entranceway | ( video/action ) sure, i know just like me you have your doubts

( video )

[Kanji hadn't hung around what would probably end up serving as a 'safe zone' for long when he'd woken up to find that Wonderland had changed. All of it was intensely familiar-- the architecture, the steam, the tense feeling that had always come over him any time he and the rest of the team had to revisit the bathhouse inside the TV for any reason. None of them were ever too thrilled to go back to the dungeons that had been created by their own hearts.

He heads up a couple of floors, just to see how extensive the change is. Just like he thought, the corridors are still winding, and they seem to shift after leaving a floor and then returning to it. That means there's plenty of ways for people to get lost, and once he confirms that there are definitely shadows on the loose, he decides it's safest to assume the worst. If there are shadows, then there could be capital 'S' Shadows too.

When he does address the network, he's still a few floors up, and the scenery behind him is hard to make out through all the steam. The bathhouse corridors seem to go on forever, and he grimaces as he uses his thumb to wipe a little bit of fog away from the camera to get a better picture.]

Uh... so this one's on me.

[No question about it.]

If you can't fight, you're probably better off stayin' near the bottom floor-- this place is crawlin' with shadows. Even then, find a friend and stay close. Can't guarantee that any place will stay safe, but I've checked out the first couple of floors so far, and the shadows-- uh, monsters there ain't too aggressive. If you guys remember that tower we were all climbin' a few weeks back, it's a little like that, but... not?

[He's helpful. Full of helpful information.]

But I gotta warn you. Last time I was here... there was this shadow that looked a lot like me. Said he was me, except he was sayin' all this shit I'd never say. I dunno if that's gonna happen this time, but in case it does? If you run into someone who looks like you, no matter what they say, you gotta accept it-- even if it's real shitty. It's a part of you, an' that's okay. We all got shitty parts. If you refuse 'em, though, things get real bad. Like, people dyin' kinda bad. I don't want anyone here gettin' hurt.

[He exhales. This is getting long-winded, but it kind of has to be, doesn't it?]

Whatever happens while we're here, I'm gonna do whatever I can to help keep people safe. Just don't run off on your own, okay? Nobody gets through this kinda thing without their friends.

( action )

[Kanji returns to the first floor not long after he sends out his message. First things first; he needs to gear up. He uses one of the lockers there to try to get his hands on some basic supplies-- food and water are important if they're going to be here for any length of time. A weapon is easy to come by: he grabs hold of one of the folding chairs near the showers and tucks it under his arm before he goes in search of people he knows, just to get a good idea of where his friends are at to make sure they're being safe. He'll check in on people he doesn't know, too: making sure that they're armed and ready to protect themselves, and that they're using some sort of buddy system.

It's not long before he decides to head up again. Back home, the shadows never came down to invade the first floor, but that was because the team was working their way up and fighting them off-- they didn't give the shadows the chance to spread beyond the bathhouse, and he's not taking any chances now. While he's fighting his way through, he'll be keeping an eye out for anyone else who might be exploring, prepared to jump in and help where he's needed.

He remembers what it was like. Even knowing he'd had something like his Shadow inside of him, it had still been almost impossible to face it head-on, because he hadn't wanted to admit to what it had twisted his feelings into. Even if they've been warned of what's ahead, he knows not everyone is going to be able to accept what they see and hear. Luckily, that's what's friends are for.]

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[Like Kanji, Souji is just thrilled to be visiting the bathhouse again. Except he can't quite think of what the building is actually called. That's a clear giveaway of what was lost. He'll have to ask someone--probably Minato--afterward and get it written down with the other words.

And like Kanji, Souji's wandering around fighting shadows and taking names. It's hard to see through the steam at times, but he recognizes Kanji when he sees him and heads on over to meet up.]

Didn't think I'd see this place again.

[Kanji grimaces-- Souji had managed to find him in-between dispatching shadows, and he looks like the heat is starting to get to him, though he's determined not to let it slow him down.]

Me neither. I can't think of anywhere from home I'd wanna see less.

[Understandably so, he figures.]

I can think of at least one place.

[But the bathhouse is definitely in the top ten.]

...Do you remember what this place is called?

Sure, it's a--

[He cuts himself off, frowning. There it is, on the tip of his tongue, and yet...]

... huh. What is this place? I mean, it's inside the TV, and it's mine, but beyond that, I got nothin'.

So that's what we lost.

[Glad it's not just him, but not really happy about it all the same.]

Let's ask someone about it when this is over.

That mean whatever this place is gonna go all... static for me?

[He hasn't had the opportunity to experience a whole lot of forgotten words.]

Well. At least if I have to forget anything... I don't mind forgettin' this, even if it's just the name for it.

It's part of you.

[But Souji thinks he can understand.]

Are you looking for anything in particular?

[He starts to shake his head, then pauses to exhale.]

If my Shadow is here, too, I wanna find it and get it taken care of so I can focus on helpin' other people, that's all.

[Souji wonders if Kanji's Shadow will appear after he's already accepted it at home. But it's an event, so it was possible.

He also can't help wondering if his own Shadow is lurking somewhere. He secretly hopes not. There are some things he just doesn't want to face--but then, if he feels that way, it might be a good indication that he does have a Shadow somewhere around. It's interesting to him, in a more or less objective sense, that he hadn't had a Shadow at home, but that he might have one now, after so long in Wonderland.]

Do you want help?

[With the Shadow. He doubts Kanji will need it, but offers all the same.]

[Kanji smiles at the offer. He figures it almost always goes without saying, but:]

Like I'd ever turn you down.

[They're always better as a team, or so he likes to think. Here, it's just the two of them and Minato, but he still feels like his odds are better when he and Souji work together, even if the rest of their team is still back home.]

You don't mind spendin' more time in this place?

[He puts a hand on his hip, his sword in his other hand.]

It'll be more practice, like at home.

[They certainly spent a lot of time ~~dungeon crawling~~ re-exploring different parts of the TV world and the bathhouse wasn't an exception to that.]

At least we know what to expect. There aren't monsters we've never heard of.

[Like there had been in Tartarus.]

That's true. Didn't think I'd ever be happy to see shadows, but after the stuff we ran into in Tartarus? I'll take these guys any day.

[They know how to handle these. There's no surprises.]

Shadows make sense.

[They aren't invisible horrible dogs. Or things that try to eat a guy's brains.]

Let's keep moving.

[He doesn't want to find out if the Reaper will come if they stay put.]

Yeah. They're predictable.

[At least for them. They're practically experts at this point. Kanji nods, beginning to move forward through the steam, keeping on the alert for any signs that someone else might be nearby, in need of their help.]

Hey, senpai? I know you never a had to deal with a Shadow of your own in a place like this. Is that-- is it just because you're special? Or is there really nothin' you don't like about yourself?

[Souji considers the question for a moment before answering.]

I'm not sure. I've always thought it was because I have so many Personas.

[It would be hard, he thinks, to manifest a single Shadow when there are so many facets to his soul. He's not sure he'd call that special, though.]

It's not that there aren't things about myself I dislike.

[Or at least, there are things he has hangups about.]

You ever think it's maybe the other way around? Like, not that you didn't get a Shadow 'cause you have so many Personas, but... you have all those Personas because even the parts you don't like, you've always accepted?

[He's spitballing, honestly, trying to find a theory that sticks, but his curiosity is nothing short of earnest.]

You always accept everyone else without question. You take the time to understand everyone, so maybe... even if there's stuff you don't like about yourself, you've always been able to accept that they're part of you anyway, an' that's what makes you special? You didn't need help because you'd already figured it out.

[Maybe.]

[For a few steps, Souji's quiet. Then he nods slowly.]

That might be one way to look at it.

[His friends really think a lot of him, don't they? He thinks he must take that for granted sometimes.]

Remember the links Minato and I told you about? I have those with all of you. So all of you are part of me through my Personas. I couldn't be myself if I didn't accept you.

[On a fundamental level, he has to have people around him to define him as a person. Like water changes its shape to conform to the container around it, he changes his "mask" to match the people around him. He's still not totally sure what's behind that mask when he's alone. But like Kanji said, he's come to accept that about himself.]

That's--

[It takes Kanji a moment to chew on that, to really wrap his head around it. He thinks he gets it, at least.]

It's pretty heavy, but it makes sense. Those bonds you have with us-- all your friendships. That's what helps you awaken to new parts of yourself, right?

Right. [Souji offers a brief smile.] All of my Personas except for Izanagi were born because of my bonds with other people.

( video/action ) sure, i know just like me you have your doubts

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