004 ★ video

[selfrespecting]

[Somewhere around mid-morning, Martha's face shows up on the network. She's seated at the desk in her room and while she has an air of business about her, she starts off with a smile.]

Hello, everyone. I had a few things I wanted to ask you all about. [She draws a hand through her hair.]

First of all, I was wondering about memory. We all know that it's a large part of why we're here, so I wanted to know what your experience was with losing memories. I don't mean like when someone leaves and comes back and remembers nothing, but... less noticeable things. Gaps, things that don't quite make sense... [Martha's guess is that there's a more subtle kind of memory siphoning going on here, and she'd like to know more about it.]

Or if you have any experience with selling a memory to a vendor, that would count too. [She knows a certain someone who would fit into that category, but there may be others too.]

The second thing is... [She lets out a sigh and straightens in her seat.]

I know we don't have much in the way of medical professionals around here these days, but with the jabberwocky in our future, I'm going to need all the help I can get. [She had Peter for a short while, but he's gone now, which means she's essentially been running the clinic on her own.]

If you have any experience or if you're willing to learn some basic first aid, then I'll do my best to teach you. I can't exactly be choosy with who I take on as help right now, so let me know if you're interested.

[This does not mean that America should volunteer, however. Martha's hoping he's too busy feeling sorry for himself to notice this. Fingers crossed.] And that's all for now. Thank you, everyone. [She reaches forward and the feed cuts off.]

[VIDEO]

[stoptheviolence]

[The camera unfocuses for a moment before focusing back in on...Brittany. Of course. It’s her camera, so why wouldn’t it be her? But she’s not alone. There’s an adorable miniature pony at her side...with a horn on its head...and the sounds of a chirping squirrel can be heard coming from somewhere just off-screen.]

[Brittany, of course, sees nothing wrong with any of this, and is happily spinning in her chair, wearing her pajamas, despite the fact that her hair is has been expertly styled, and her makeup is impeccable. Beside her, the usual decorations of a youthful teen girl could be seen. Bright colors. Stuffed animals. And a particular picture seen hanging on the wall right over her bed.]

‘sup, Wonderland. I’m Brittany. And this is my new show, the Wonderland edition of Fondue for Two.

...well, four, if you count Lady Winny and Sir Squeakums over there.

[More chirping, as if the squirrel were responding to her. The unicorn remained silent. Content with just sitting there and looking fabulous. As she should. Santana, on the other hand, is sitting nearby but away from the furry creatures, looking...like she is doing this out of love. Being the first semi-guest was not on her to-do list, especially after her experience with the show back home. Again: for love.]

We’re here to bring you the latest and greatest of Wonderland’s cheezy news. [As she says this, she leans forward and reaches down to pick up...something speared onto a large toothpick and covered in Fondue goodness. She makes a show of eating it. Because cheezy fondue. Get it?] And, I guess, whatever else we feel like talking about at the moment.

So if you’ve got the goods, feel free to call in. After all, sharing is caring.

[And then, just before she lets it go to the phones...or Network, or whatever, Santana decides to speak up:]

Do it or Imma break some kneecaps.

[audio] fearful news

[goodnightlisteners]

[Cecil doesn't sound quite as composed today. His voice is shaking a bit, in fact.]

Hello, listeners. This isn't part of the show, no--I just thought I should share some very...unfortunate news. Carlos the scientist has returned home, it seems. At least, his room has reverted to its default and all of his strange, scientific equipment has vanished. There's only one thing to conclude from that, isn't there?

Well, I only hope that he is safe, back in Night Vale. If indeed that is where he has gone.

[There's an audible pause.] Sorry for the interruption, listeners. We'll return to our regular broadcasting after this.