[ Mondo hasn't gotten the chance to look away when Ishimaru caught him in the eyes. He can't now, and it's not that he planned to ー after all, he doesn't want to run away anymore. Still, it's been a while since he last felt the intensity of those red eyes, and he definitely has underestimated it, or at least forgotten how powerful they are.
Definitely looking a little awkward here, but he's not looking away. ]
Y... Yeah.
[ Even after everything, Ishimaru still worries for Mondo with such straightforward, genuine emotions overflowing. ]
......
[ Words are hard. Mondo has always conversed with fists all his life, having to just sit down and let everything out in the open isn't as simple as making your mind up about it and forcing it out. It's only a few beats later he finally blurts out something raw and unpolished. What is intelligent conversation. ]
I'm sorry. [ His eyes finally swim away, but just for a moment, before quickly refocusing back to Ishimaru. He's sorry for worrying him, among many other things. No matter how many apology he utters, it won't be enough. ] No words could make up for what I did, both to you and to Fujisaki.
[ He's still reeling in the brief encounter he had with 'Fujisaki' in Tartarus. Even if it turned out to be something else that's not Fujisaki ー a dangerous being that could easily shift shapes into whatever they want ー he still wonders if Fujisaki too felt what that creature said. Snatching away the future from him, wrecking the potential of a world-changing program in-progress... maybe if Fujisaki didn't die, he could've saved everyone out of that terror of school.
Taking a deep breath, Mondo shakes off those thoughts.
Right now, Ishimaru's the one who's here, right in front of him. Ishimaru's the one who's still present and still very much alive. He's here, waiting for him, and Mondo's been preparing himself for when this chance comes. The past can never be changed no matter what, but the future is in their hands. ]
I thought it was for the best, keeping a distance from you. But I realised I was just being a coward. I was just running away.
[ This is what he needs to address, what he needs to focus on. ]
I made zero progress since that day. Pathetic, huh?
[ He hasn't noticed the sweats beading across his forehead and temples, across his shoulders, not until he says all those that the back of his hand subconsciously wipes them off. It's supposed to be hot here, and yet he feels colder than ever. His determination slowly weakens, together with the glint in his eyes. They slowly move further, further from Ishimaru's fiery ones. ]
Even now, I'm still... [ Like biting a piece of metal, he struggles. This isn't the first time he admits to this, and yet it's still so hard. ] ...scared. That I might do the same thing to you.
( night of the living naked )
Definitely looking a little awkward here, but he's not looking away. ]
Y... Yeah.
[ Even after everything, Ishimaru still worries for Mondo with such straightforward, genuine emotions overflowing. ]
......
[ Words are hard. Mondo has always conversed with fists all his life, having to just sit down and let everything out in the open isn't as simple as making your mind up about it and forcing it out. It's only a few beats later he finally blurts out something raw and unpolished. What is intelligent conversation. ]
I'm sorry. [ His eyes finally swim away, but just for a moment, before quickly refocusing back to Ishimaru. He's sorry for worrying him, among many other things. No matter how many apology he utters, it won't be enough. ] No words could make up for what I did, both to you and to Fujisaki.
[ He's still reeling in the brief encounter he had with 'Fujisaki' in Tartarus. Even if it turned out to be something else that's not Fujisaki ー a dangerous being that could easily shift shapes into whatever they want ー he still wonders if Fujisaki too felt what that creature said. Snatching away the future from him, wrecking the potential of a world-changing program in-progress... maybe if Fujisaki didn't die, he could've saved everyone out of that terror of school.
Taking a deep breath, Mondo shakes off those thoughts.
Right now, Ishimaru's the one who's here, right in front of him. Ishimaru's the one who's still present and still very much alive. He's here, waiting for him, and Mondo's been preparing himself for when this chance comes. The past can never be changed no matter what, but the future is in their hands. ]
I thought it was for the best, keeping a distance from you. But I realised I was just being a coward. I was just running away.
[ This is what he needs to address, what he needs to focus on. ]
I made zero progress since that day. Pathetic, huh?
[ He hasn't noticed the sweats beading across his forehead and temples, across his shoulders, not until he says all those that the back of his hand subconsciously wipes them off. It's supposed to be hot here, and yet he feels colder than ever. His determination slowly weakens, together with the glint in his eyes. They slowly move further, further from Ishimaru's fiery ones. ]
Even now, I'm still... [ Like biting a piece of metal, he struggles. This isn't the first time he admits to this, and yet it's still so hard. ] ...scared. That I might do the same thing to you.