[Sounds like someone misunderstood the metaphor.]

Well, I should get the bad news out of the way first- Somehow, you were literally plucked from your own home world and dropped off here with no way out.

[There's a light sigh, like he's actually disturbed by this.]

But it's not all bad, though. Time doesn't quite work like it should, so when you finally go back home you'll end up right where you left off in your life. Memories and all.

Oh, and I hope you didn't want to grow up, for nobody ages here either.