video } from Ace of Spades, the Wonderland Blog of Georgia Mason, entry #17

[choosetruth]

[Georgia’s been scarce lately. Between her office getting a giant hole in it thanks to Entrapta and Peridot’s experiments and both Shaun and herself dying in a recent event… she’s not in a great place. But she can’t allow herself to sulk for too long. She doesn’t like it, and it won’t get them anywhere.

Fortunately, there’s one mystery she has an actual way to answer. Hopefully. She’s standing on the far side of the lake, holding a white rose. It looks very delicate next to the extreme amounts of body armor she’s wearing. Leather jacket with armored joints, jeans woven with kevlar, a freaking helmet... she’s ready for war.

Shaun, who usually has to be argued and ordered and bribed into body armor, is similarly attired. Armored jacket, jeans, helmet, guns in holsters on each of his hips… and a rocket launcher aimed at the rose in George's hand.

Georgia adjusts her sunglasses before she speaks.]

As many of you know, I’ve been investigating the White Queen’s initial death for a very long time. She gave me a way to contact her in case of emergencies. I haven’t had cause to use it, but in light of recent events…. [She grimaces.] It seems prudent to try.

Have I ever mentioned that I love your interview style, George? You just have a way of putting your subjects a ease. [Shaun gives her a sunny smile as he shifts the rocket launcher on his shoulder. He's real glad not to be dead anymore.]

[She shoots him a glare, then continues.] As you’ll notice, we’re taking every precaution. We’re as far from the Mansion as we can get. We’re armed. I think Shaun’s actually hoping for the worst case scenario so he can test out his new girlfriend. I can’t guarantee it’ll be enough, but if the Jabberwock is back we’re fucked anyway so… [She shrugs.] Better to know now.

I'm ready when you are.

[Georgia nods sharply. Then, very carefully, she tugs off one of the petals and lets it float to the ground.

For a moment, nothing happens. Then something falls on Georgia’s head, almost imperceptible through the helmet. She frowns and looks up.]

That’s weird. Is it… raining?

[The next one falls directly on her face. At this point? It’s clearly not water. It’s a small and very cranky looking lizard. And it’s not alone. Falling from the sky in the area directly surrounding her and Georgia are hundreds of tiny lizards. Georgia ducks, covering her face.]

What the fuck?

WHY ARE THERE LIZARDS EVERYWHERE? [The rocket launcher will not be helpful in this situation. Shaun sets it down but then… he's at a loss. What the fuck are they supposed to do about all these lizards?

Georgia charges forward towards the camera, shielding her face with her hand.]

Safe to say things are not fine and dandy with the White Queen. Also safe to say I have even less idea what the fuck is going on than earlier. [She glances behind at Shaun, then back to the camera.] ...stand by for more information.

[End feed. But not quite end of the lizard rain, which lasts a little longer before petering out. Wonderful.]

Comments

Video

[teamfun]

[Louis opens his mouth to say something, then closes it again. He stares a little more at the weird fucking lizard rain. ]

Sure. Why not. Magical rose petal cell phone creates raining lizards. Sure. Makes perfect sense. Of course dropping rose petals would make it rain lizards. Of course it would.

Video

[choosetruth]

It wasn't supposed to.

[Georgia has her helmet off now. The danger, such as it was, seems to have passed.]

But I guess this place has never been much for "supposed to," has it?

Video

[teamfun]

Well, no. If it was supposed to, I'd be deeply questioning your sanity by now.

[He gives a soft snort.]

Tch, yeah. The day this place stops pulling random bullshit out of a hat is the day we know it's probably imploding on itself or something. Anyway- you think this white queen is even reachable? It sounds like she completely peaced out on us.

Video

[singloversing]

[Wirt's blood runs cold when he sees the lizards fall out of the sky. They don't look the same, not really, but it's too much of a coincidence for him to just ignore it.]

Oh my God. Y-You need to get away from them! They're dangerous!

[Or at least he assumes they are. Why would the mansion flood with lizards again, immediately after a Jabberwocky sighting, and have them not be dangerous?]

Video

[choosetruth]

Well, I’m certainly not planning on snuggling them.

[Georgia has her helmet off by now, and she’s sitting a little ways away out of the lizard blast zone.]

But they don’t seem to be doing much dangerous. Or at all.

Video

[adaptiveimmunities]

[Shaun is standing nearby, holding one of the lizards. Now that the shock has worn off, and they don't seem about to rain immediate fire and death down on Wonderland, he's a lot less concerned about them than he had initially been.]

I don't know, George. They're kind of cute.

[He holds it toward her.]

Look at its little face.

[audio]

[shslliar]

[... You can hear him checking his notes for a second.]

... Whelp. That totally just happened. I probably wouldn't take the lizards home if I were you.

[audio]

[choosetruth]

Why the fuck would I want to take them home? [Georgia sounds mystified.]

[audio]

[adaptiveimmunities]

The real question is, why wouldn't you?

[Shaun probably isn't about to adopt one, but he's not above messing with George when the opportunity presents.]

[video forever]

[howsitgoindude]

Um. There's a lizard in the movie, isn't there? Like, doesn't he go down the chimney or something?

[And of course the big ol' monster lizard they saw in the video that is probably more relevant, but. Soos is being optimistic.]

[choosetruth]

Uh. [Georgia doesn’t exactly speak Soos, so it takes her a moment.]

Are you referring to Bill?

[video]

[waitin]

( Georgia and Shaun were two more people she couldn't find at the end of the Event when she was trying to figure out who was left alive and who was dead. There were more dead than alive. The emptiness still makes her feel sick when she thinks back to it.

Clementine holds her breath as they summon, holds her breath like maybe she'll see them die right there on screen, and then... lizards. From the sky. )

What the fuck.

[video]

[adaptiveimmunities]

That is a really good question.

[Shaun has taken a few steps back from the lizard problem, even though the rain is slowing down. He's not really afraid of them, but... they're kind of little. And easily squished. And he's not really interested in stepping on the things when they don't seem to be anything other than a nuisance.]

[video]

[choosetruth]

Out of all the potential outcomes of this venture, this... didn’t even make the list.

[Georgia shakes her head.]

I hate this place.

video;

[beatupgrass]

[Awww look his handiwork is onscreen. He's ignoring the lizards for now, because yikes.]

If you're gonna product place me, at least tell the people at home who built Shaun's girlfriend.

video;

[adaptiveimmunities]

Sorry--my mistake. [He picks up the rocket launcher again and displays it for the camera with pride.]

All rocket launchers for this program provided by Rocket. This is not a paid promotion, I just really like his work.

video;

[choosetruth]

That would imply I think more people here should have rocket launchers, which I absolutely do not.

[...and too late. Well, it's a pretty obvious source.]

video;

[powerofmabel]

What if they're baby Jabberwockies???

[It's hard to tell if she's horrified or delighted.]

video;

[adaptiveimmunities]

They don't look like baby Jabberwockies. Probably. I'm not sure what a baby Jabberwocky looks like, to be honest. But none of them is raining death and fire down on us, so that seems like an improvement on the older model.

video;

[choosetruth]

They aren't eating more than the usual lizard would, from what I can tell. They all seem very... normal.

[Besides the part where they fell out of the sky onto her head.]

[angewiesen]

Can you tell me what you know about the Jabberwock? I'm guessing you've been here long enough to actually see it in action, right?

[choosetruth]

Wrong, actually. The Red Queen had shut it in the Core before I got here. But I've done my reading.

[angewiesen]

Alright, it'll do. What do you know?

video;

[thereporter]

[ So, this is a thing that is actually happening. Julia is sitting in the office, Horace perched by her side in the chair, and he seems just as interested in the lizards on the screen as Julia is. ]

What the fuck, guys.

video;

[adaptiveimmunities]

[Shaun just... gestures and shakes his head.]

Lizards, apparently.