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were the closets playing pranks on anyone else yesterday?

[ faith's morning had started with a rather ... rural wake up call. she'd really hoped the little bastard would just disappear overnight. instead, he woke her up at the crack of dawn to a room full of feathers and pecked drywall.

eventually she'll have to just ... accept her new fowl-ler. into the diner for breakfast, where he's actually quite patient (and fond of toast). on to the gym for her morning workout, where apparently he needs a nap after all that strenuous crowing.

his cocky attitude returns in the library, where faith had planned hanging out for about an hour, learning about the supernatural elements of other worlds. she would've been better served looking up ways to keep him quiet, once it's clear he's going to continue hollering. amid glares and shushing, she scoops him up and tries apologizing over the noise before giving one particular patron the bird.

she practically books it out, rooster tucked under her arm. and as she makes her way, she doesn't notice the mess he leaves behind along the hallways. a trail of feathers and excrement leading to angel investigations, where the closet still refuses to cooperate and give her a cage. at least the cock is having fun with the pile of bic ballpoints beside her. ]

do leashes work on chickens?

[ by the end of the night, she's given up. the stupid thing even follows her to the bar where at least the corn nuts seem to satisfy him. she can nap at one of the tables, right...? ]

( ooc | feel free to catch her anywhere / make up somewhere else to find faith wrangling a mother clucking rooster as she goes about her day :3 )

Comments

[intelligently]

It's a chicken. They only fend for themselves so much.

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jesus
not trying to send it off to die

[accelero]

hens make noise, too. did it crow at all>

[ hi, you're the one who fooled him into thinking a chicken's life is at stake, some fries are a small price for alla that. ]

[beatupgrass]

it ain't like it gave you its life story in the ten minutes since it came from the flarkin' closet.

...wait. did it?

[that's a thing that could happen here.]

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Woke me up at the ass-crack of dawn.

[ which she sounds just sooooo elated about. not.

...also ok fine she will allow the thieving. can't be all that mad about someone with persistence. ]

[accelero]

[ he may be snorting over here. sorry, faith. ]

you know, you could try to simply find him a room and have your sleep back. if it's a rooster, you'll get the crows pretty often.

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no
just saying i'm not trying to eat something that was just walking around an hour ago

[thesamurai]

If it makes any difference, chickens are filthy. Pigs are cleaner than chickens. But that being said, it’s too cold to just...toss it outside.

[She’s not a monster.]

You’re gonna be up every day at the ass crack of dawn, you know.

[actualwizard]

knee deep in cocks...that would be a sight.

[beatupgrass]

hey, you gotta make sure in a joint like this. there's talkin' birds everywhere.

[said the talking raccoon.]

[fatherlesskind]

Alistair.

[He turns to face her properly, doing his best to appear serious and concerned. It's only half-way successful, his eyes sparkling with amusement despite himself.]

I did.... I came looking for help in solving the mystery of the bird droppings mysteriously appearing inside. Do you think you can help me figure out the answer? [So yeah, he's just nosy. He grins again, giving up on the act entirely.] Is that what you do here? Solve problems for people?

[intelligently]

Maybe it'll run into the woods never to be found.
They're not exactly a great pet. Unless you want eggs.

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He scared the balls off of me this morning already.

[ siiiiigh. hey wait-- ]

You keep pigs at home?

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[ she considers that while she chews, eyebrows lifting as the corners of her mouth turn downward. ]

For real? What, like-- have a rooster room?

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seriously?
how did i miss talking animals?

[ ...oh faith ]

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[ a laugh bursts out of her at that, and faith starts shaking her head, vigorously. ]

Yeah but no bird poop, sorry. You got a demon or a curse to take down? No problem.

[ faith does move to the door though, to get a look at the mess she trailed in here. wow. yeah. that's ... pretty bad. the mansion cleans itself up right...? ]

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i'd have everything i need to supply this place with nonstop cock pics at least.

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not even getting eggs. this bastard woke me up about an hour after i crashed

[ maybe you shouldn't go to bed at 4am faith ]

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[ she nods, but her head bobbles a little as she considers it. she kind of agrees... ]

Can't help but figure lot of people here are champion types. Big on the protection.

[ is that her? who knows. probably no one ever. ]

Don't know if it's on purpose, but they don't like it when they come up against stuff you can't win against. Actually like to run their mouths more, when that happens.

[radiopalkiller]

Don't give up on him so easily; contrary to the popular saying it's never too late to teach an old rooster new tricks.

[ And teaching a piece of poultry petrification like others teach a dog to go fetch? Wouldn't even be the strangest thing he's seen here. Philip brushes aside a few loose notes, and flips through the pages. ]

Let's see, here's the thing I was thinking of: Cockatrice, half dragon, half rooster, or just about. Basilisks, apparently, in a few worlds they've got that trick too. I'm collecting from the books and people's accounts, you never know what Wonderland might want to drag up one day, but currently... currently we're fairly low on the monster front, as best as I can tell. Fresh out of werewolves, too.

[ He shakes his head like an apologetic vendor low on the good stuff. ]

Definitely no petrifying bird-hybrids of any immediate concern, but-- [ Philip taps his lips. ] Zombies. Zombies are in season. So don't leave home without a fashionable hatchet to take the head off.

[rosswood]

["Champion types." He can see it, sure. Alex operates under a lot of illusions, but he sure as hell knows that he doesn't fall in that category, not by a long shot. He's just a normal, artistically talented college kid who got too deep into things he doesn't want to think about.

He can't imagine why someone like him would end up here, except that he can't help but be grateful that he's not where he was.

But anything would be better than that.

He nods in slow agreement.]

Fighting a losing battle. And then you start rackin' up a death count...

[intelligently]

Then you have no reason to keep it.

[thesamurai]

[She shrugs a little.]

Used to. We lived in a prison for a while, had pigs and horses. We were trying to start over again. Could have been safe, too.

[If not for the Governor.]

They got sick though, we couldn’t risk eating them.

[fatherlesskind]

[Her answer has the exact opposite affect on Alistair, all traces of humour vanishing as he looks around warily, half-expecting a demon to appear on cue. Today would have to be the day he left his sword behind for once. Why had that seemed like a good idea again?]

Funny, when I arrived everyone was telling me there's no demons here. Now you're saying there are?

[He can handle a demon or two on his own - if he's not unarmed. So he'd rather have some warning if it turns out all those people reassuring him were wrong.]

[accelero]

Well, we could ask the closet for a coop but that seems kinda cruel when this one can just be a free-range rooster.

[ is this the weirdest conversation barry has had in a while? definitely. ever? not even. ]