entranceway | 2 🐻 VIDEO.

( BACKDATED TO DEC. 1 )

[ it's evident barry's at the bar — or a bar, given how his phone's sort of sitting on the top of a tipped over bowl that had held peanuts — with a few empty bottles around him. his efforts to get drunk have proven fruitless, but barry allen is determined. ]

So, uh … [ barry looks a little tired, hair a slight mess, but he's not slurring his words. he wishes he was. ] What are you supposed to do when someone leaves? Does time kind of stop? Do rabbit holes appear out of nowhere for people to fall upwards out of?

[ it wasn't really covered in the pamphlet how you're supposed to react when someone just up and disappears. barry's never been good at that. he's tried running and he's almost going to catch a cold with how wet he always is. (his clothes are a little damp from running so fast and him winding up spluttering in the pool.) ]

Iris — Iris West, she went home. [ without him, but that's implied by how his tone drops and then picks up quickly, almost like barry doesn't need to take a breath. ] Can someone bring me a brownie? I kind of ate all the ones I brought with me and all I've got is peanuts. [ he flicks a shell a little too fast, a very brief flash of gold sparking. ] And maybe a broom. I kind of made a mess. Sorry ...

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[ he thinks to tell billy he knows, but if he does so, it may require explanation. he doesn't know how earth-2 would sound like as a story that isn't quite as fantastical as a tale one would tell a child to lull him to sleep. he knows an alternate universe doesn't exist in a vacuum; his presence had caused joe west's death, and he suspects wonderland is very much the same: a real living beast anyone and everyone can touch. ]

Do those kinds of things happen a lot here? Forgetting who you are, or some part of you that's really important. We always come back remembering, right? I was talking to Alice and she seemed ... [ he shrugs his shoulders, unsure how to even explain it. ] Not what I imagined.

[ Alternate universes are old hat for him. He wouldn't even bat an eye. ]

Not every event messes with out memories. Some don't, some only mess with certain people. Sometimes we think our lives are completely different. Once I forgot everything, who I was and the person I love. Though that was not an event, that was the jabberwocky... [ that was an entirely different nightmare. ]

But afterwards I remembered everything....or well- I guess if there is something I forgot I wouldn't know, right? I hear that only happens when the event is from your world. [ And there was an event from his world. Don't ask him what he is because he won't remember the word. ]

[ sorry, billy, but barry will zoom right back to the fact that when he forgets something, he needs to remember this one tidbit of information: wonderland is fucked if it takes anything from his world. ]

[ instead, he's a little focused on what he's learning of wonderland. everything he knows from the books? it can be tipped on its head, leading to a big spiral of a clusterfuck if he's not careful in his navigation of it. his brain's processing everything billy's told him, and he focuses on one sole thing. ]

[ his brows shoot up into his hairline. ] Jabber — seriously? How close does this place run to the actual Wonderland in the books?

[ Billy just nods and kind of shrugs. ] Jabberywocky, vorpal sword, crazy queens. Pretty close I would guess. No mad hatter though, I wonder what happened to him. It does make you think- was Carroll here and wrote the book? But then again he wouldn't remember when he went back, but if most worlds have the book then they all had a version of Carroll and then it starts getting complicated with how almost every possible version of him across worlds wrote the same book and what are the chances of that?

Alternate universes are too confusing if you think too hard. [ And now his brain hurts. ]

[ the mad hatter isn't here? ]

[ barry will have to revisit that later. billy's talking to him about the multiverse, and he knows he has to sit back and listen. he can't afford to become lost on a tangent that inevitably doesn't quite matter in the grand scheme of things. ]

[ lewis carroll was the same in every universe. barry allen was the flash in one, a csi and normal human in the other. he's only begun to investigate the very tip of the iceberg that comes with the multiverse. ]

Have you been to an alternate universe? Outside of this one.

[ He nods. The multiverse isn't a new concept to him, it's on that's been around for as long as he can remember. Plus spending six months universe hopping kind of makes it lose something of it's mystery. ]

Yeah. I've been to a few. I don't recommend a lot of them. There are also people here from an alternate of my world.

[ he should be a little spooked or at least confused, right? but barry finds himself nodding. ]

An ... alternate of your world? [ even though he sounds like he's trying to grasp the concept, it shouldn't be all that difficult for him. wells is, after all, not from earth-1, even though barry often forgets. ] Do they know you? Their you, like your doppelgänger

[ Well that's a harder question- well not hard just sorta confusing. ] uh. No. I'm not born yet in their world...if I ever will be. They are younger versions...kinda. It starts to get confusing with alternate worlds. Sometimes not everything is the same across them. So they don't know me, but I know who they are.

[ it kind of sounds like the situation he has with kara. he has never heard of catco, despite it being a big company. he's never heard of supergirl, despite her being absolutely cool. perhaps each earth has its own bubbles; maybe a barry allen exists in kara's, but he's not within her circle of influence. ]

[ billy's right, this is sort of confusing. hence: ] Dude. That's confusing. And kind of sucks? They exist back home for you, right? As friends or people in the news?

[ It totally sucks. ] Yeah, sucking is definitely the term I would use. [ It took years and a civil war and a few invasions before the Avengers trusted them enough to call them Avengers, and Billy got here and he had to do it all over again. ] Friends...well colleagues I guess. Uh. One of them is my mother. [ Kind of but he's not about to get into soul children. She's his mother. ]

[ barry opens his mouth, and lets that surprised expression on his face do the talking for him. though he's a quick thinker, nothing comes to mind at billy's answer. ]

Your mother? [ that's the person he'd kill himself to see. nora allen is the centre of his entire world, the foundation of his own values. he doesn't know what he'd do if his mother was here, and if she didn't remember him. ] Is she here?

[ Yeah. It's really complicated. Billy isn't surprised at all by Barry's reaction. ]

She was here, then she was gone and now she's back and doesn't remember anything. It was different the first time. I told her right away, seeing her again after two years here I had to. Now...I don't know if I could take it if she left again after we got close again.

[ He doesn't know why he's pouring his heart out about this, but he really hasn't had anyone to tell. ]

So she's come here before she's your mom?

[ that can be the only explanation, unless she's his mother's doppelganger and in her timeline she hasn't had her son yet. or isn't meant to. barry doesn't want to think along those lines. ]

That's tough. And it sucks that she won't remember you if she comes back again, but ... wouldn't it suck more to not get to know her all over again? Have her know you? I'd do anything to see my mom again, even if it was just for a minute.

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