swift hardhearted stone ღ anon text/action/one not so anon text at the end

[endingpoint]

t e x t
[ Jane doesn't want to potentially upset anyone, not when she knows there are so many people in Wonderland who are eager to go home, or don't want to be stuck here while slowly losing their memories. She's one of them. That's why she's anonymous. But she still wonders something, and it's been coming up a lot more. The only way to know if other people wonder the same things is to ask, right? ]

I've been wondering: people get upset about being here for a long time and losing all of their memories of home, eventually. Does anyone know exactly how long that takes?

Also, is there a specific reason why it matters?

(Other than the big thing, losing yourself, which I get is a huge deal.) But, in theory, even if you forget everything while you're here, as soon as you're home, you remember again. Who you are, where you're from. It all comes back and then it's Wonderland and all the people here you've connected with that you forget.

Right?

I guess I was just wondering if people are as passionate about the ones who would be stuck here in their wake, as they are about the people they miss at home that don't even know they're gone. I can tell you I don't know where I fall half the time.

[ No one's particularly missing her at home, so. ]

a c t i o n

[ It never feels like there's a specific place Jane wants to go in Wonderland when she's restless. Most of the time she finds herself wandering if she has no tattoo appointments, or tucked away somewhere sketching. For today, there's a little bit of browsing in the library (she picks up classic novels this time around plus two cookbooks) before she tucks herself in the main entrance of the mansion with her sketchbook after finding a comfortable, oversized chair. She'd thought to sketch the grand doors and the view from the windows, but instead, her mind has something else in store. The memory she has is fuzzy, but she's sure the person she's sketching is her brother. He has a scar, the same as the boy she remembered months and months ago, and the same as the man in the photo she received in her stocking. It gives her hope that she has a family out there somewhere, even if she doesn't know his name.

When she's done, she goes to the dining room and pulls out one of the cookbooks, flipping to random pages with food that seems worth trying. As she notes what looks good, the dishes appear in front of her until she has a full meal with ample portion sizes. Which prompts a (non-anon this time) text once again, hours apart from her original message with an image attached: ]

Anyone wanna come help me eat this food? Dining room. BYO fork.

Comments

[circlejerked]

Still getting used to the perks of the dining room and all that instant food?

_{[Could be Miss Anon is recently arrived and ruminating about what it all means, hence the post. Wouldn't be the first time. Anders has been there.]}

I guess so. Having advance notice and being unable to do anything is worse. Are you worried you might be the one to go, or the one to stay?

[endingpoint]

Something like that. It never occurred to me I could ask for literally anything I wanted.

[ His question makes her pause a little, unsure of a yes or no answer. ]

...Both? I think it's both, if that can be my answer.

[circlejerked]

Nature-defying wish-fulfillment does take some getting used to.

_{[Items spontaneously appear in closets. Really, what's with that? The kitten debacle of 2016 is still fresh in Anders' mind.]}

I think it'd be stranger if you didn't have reservations. I'm not giving up on the hope there's a way to keep both sets of memories and make a choice when the time comes.

_{[He doesn't see staying here as a solution, but other people have other reasons. They all deserve the freedom to choose.}

[endingpoint]

You mean a choice to stay or a choice to leave? What if once you make that choice you can never change your mind? If you leave, there's never any coming back, and if you stay, you can never go back home?

[circlejerked]

I try not to think in absolutes, it gives me headaches.

I know a girl who can rip open the fabric of reality and create holes to other dimensions. I have to think travel like that is an ability or a technology. It can be learned. Used for what we want it to do.

[endingpoint]

That's an intense thing to be able to do.

So the hope is we can learn, maybe. How to get to other dimensions away from here ourselves?

[circlejerked]

It's just as intense to see it, I can promise you. I nearly wet myself the first time.

_{[Elizabeth creating a hole into Puppy Land had taken some of the sting of an impending existential crisis out of it, he'll say that much. But he feels his point stands--that a door swings both ways.]}

Seems within the realm of possibility. If we could cross into Wonderland, we could theoretically cross into other places.

_{[Some residents already make it look easy--why not think they could do the same?]}

[endingpoint]

I'd be afraid of accidentally going someplace other than where I wanted to be, and not being able to get out.

[ She's a non-practicing realm-hopper, okay? No experience other than Wonderland, would not know how to cope. Still doesn't know how to cope with this, almost a year later. ]

[circlejerked]

I'm not too keen on a repeat of Wonderland myself. I have business back home to take care of, but it's an option for those who can't go back and don't want to stay here.

How about you? Has talking about all of this helped set your mind more at ease?

_{[They're pretty hefty ideas to grapple with--whether to stay or go, whether they'll remember one thing or another.}

[endingpoint]

I don't think my mind's at ease necessarily, but I do feel better knowing this is something a lot of people seem to struggle with. It helps to not feel alone.

[circlejerked]

It's a big, big universe out there--bigger than most knew. Lots to think about.

_{[She's definitely not alone in that.]}

A little talk therapy can go a long way to keeping you ripping your hair out. If it's helping with that, I'd consider your message a success.

[endingpoint]

The therapist I was going to for all of this disappeared, so. I guess this is better than nothing? We're all in this together or something.

[circlejerked]

Well, you've got an entire mansion to make conversation with. You have options!

We're agreed on that last part. We're stuck together, might as well make the most of it.

[endingpoint]

I really appreciate the conversation. It did calm me down. I think I can even try and sleep now. Maybe.

Thank you.

[circlejerked]

Anytime. Happy to hear it helped in some way.

If you can't, the network's only a button away and I like to talk. Probably too much.