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[ When Sarah comes into view, she's sitting with her elbows on a table, fingers steepled, and she actually looks Very Serious™ while contemplating how best to phrase her question. The conversation has come up privately, and she needs to have a full understanding of one of the parts of Wonderland she's never bothered with - the Vendors. ]

Hey. I know everyone's kind of consumed with what the dormouse had to say or...didn't say. But I really want to see where everyone falls regarding opinions on the Vendors.

Since we can't pick the memory they want, that means somehow they can rifle through our minds to pick the thing they want to take. And it'd probably have to be something meaningful or impactful. If I ever, for whatever reason, had no option but to use the Vendors, I could lose something like the birth of my son. I'd have no choice or say in the matter.

[ Her reason for using the Vendors would have to be extraordinary. Something involving Kurt or Ray and dire circumstances. ]

Anyway, my actual question is...how do we know, if the Vendors can access our minds and memories, that they or someone or something else doesn't do that all the time, on a constant basis? If Wonderland does actually use our memories to fuel the things that happen here, does that mean our brains are constantly being...I don't know. Monitored???

I'd really like some opinions on this.

[ Sarah isn't paranoid at all usually, and she'd say this is more concerned than paranoid, but it feels like such a violation of privacy that she can't help asking the community at large. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Since they're private here, she'll spill. ]

What was it like, though? The experience itself? Do they...talk? Was it worth it?

[ Sarah takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. ]

Ray's thinking about it.

They didn't talk to me, and I didn't try to talk to them either. The stuff was laying out there like they just knew what I'd take from it. I feel like my answer to whether or not it's worth it, won't be accurate since a mirror stole what I picked up anyway.

( And it was a complicated item, driven solely by his own heart, his own complicated emotions about his mother who died, but wasn't actually dead, who abandoned him, who took everything from him before trying again, who died again. )

...for what?

[ Sarah takes a deep breath and lets it out, rubbing a hand over her face. ]

Someone came back from going home and it's...not a great situation. But Ray thinks he can get what he needs to help from the vendors.

[ She's not thrilled about it, but she'll be as supportive as she can while learning as much as she can. ]

If the situation's that dire, it's not a bad idea.

But there's no way to know what they take from you, and once it's gone, it's gone. It's not some fuzzy darkness in your mind so you get some idea of what was taken either.

[ Sarah lets out a breath; she'd do it, she knows she would. It would just suck. And she knows if Ray doesn't think he has any other choice, he will, too. She just doesn't want him to lose something that means a lot to him. Which will happen because the Vendors apparently aren't dicking around with this. ]

And it just...it never comes back? Do you know if that still holds up even if you leave and return to Wonderland?

It never comes back.

If you leave and come back, you'll still have forgotten the thing you sold off to them, because it's their currency. If they took money instead then you'd still come back without that money, because they own it now. It's just like that. The difference is you'd at least remember just how much money you gave away.

Well. This has all been highly informative and slightly terrifying. But at least I have a better understanding of it now, thanks to you.

Helps to know what you're getting into before you get into it. Hopefully, he's sure about this thing he wants.

Elena's gotten something from the vendors too before she realized the cost, before I showed up. She lost a memory, a memory of her and I. ( one that was important to him, them. it pissed him off at the time that she didn't remember it, that she'd give away a memory even though she didn't know that was what was happening. )

Oh, shit.

[ Damn. She obviously didn't know, but knowing someone who knows what the consequences look like helps in some way. ]

You know what she lost, then.

[ It's a statement, not a question because it's none of her business. ]

Yeah. I do. I mentioned it, and she had no idea what I was talking about.

( To be fair, it was the moment she forgave him for something he shouldn't have been forgiven for at least not that quickly, not because he was dying. )

I was a much bigger dick back then so I didn't respond well.

I can't imagine in any circumstance reacting well would be an option. So I don't blame you. Dick or not.

That's nice of you, but you didn't see how much of a dick I was. ( he's smirking though. it's all water under the bridge now. ) Point is it ends up working out. If we all stay in Wonderland long enough, we'll end up forgetting most of what we knew anyway.

[ True, he could have been King Dick and she'd never know, but she likes giving people the benefit of the doubt. Though she'll follow his lead on this one. ]

I mean, good point. I don't know if that should be the ultimate goal, but...fair point.

Definitely not a goal. Just an inevitability of living here too long.

( he's smirking despite the weight of it, the truth of it. they'll forget. might as well use it to their advantage when they need to. ) At least it sounds like he's losing one for a good reason instead of whatever the hell Wonderland's reasons are.

Yeah. I mean, I don't want this to be the route he feels like he has to take. Especially when there's no promise it'll work. But I guess a lot about this place is...try your best and hope Wonderland doesn't screw you over.

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