entranceway | 001 [video | action for the basement]

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001 [video | action for the basement]

[While it's obvious everyone is oh so busy doing Disney on Broadway with each other, this, however, is entirely more important than whatever the hell it is you people are doing.

There's a squelch of feedback over the communicators, before you all get treated to this lovely little one-up. Everyone else is bragging? This pretty much settles the argument of the best, right?

But it's the actual Black Sabbath recording, not Tony, and for that...Well, it's up to you whether to feel grateful or not. For all you people know, he has a great voice (spoiler: he does).

And it's loud, and only fades to background noise when the video feed cuts on. In it is someone some of you might recognize from movies...Or fifty years worth of comics or...Having to deal with his pompous ass numerous times in that whole saving the world gig. Tony's leaned against a table covered in various power tools, a sledge hammer propped beside him, and there's evidence all behind him that he's been hard at work. There are gaping holes everywhere, wires and cables trailing all over the floor, blinking lights...The works. And he does look mighty proud of himself.]

So I get that we're stuck here, and there's no just demanding to go home. And I get that this is some Tim Burton-envisioned version of Alice In Wonderland. [He leans back and picks up something off the table, which is proven to be one of the pamphlets. Where'd he get it? Don't ask silly questions.] And I get the closets, the dying thing - which, for the record, is entirely messed up - the people from fictional worlds and other times and whatever else was in this thing.

So basically what you guys are saying in this thing- [He taps the corner of the pamphlet, before tossing it behind him.] Is that we're probably trapped in some kind of wormhole. If not a wormhole, some kind of extra-dimensional black hole pocket or something. Seriously, is there no one here that's considered that? Is this place pulling the best of the best from places or just grabbing you guys randomly and so no one's had this thought rattle through their head? I mean, that was my first guess, minute one.

Anyway, since we're stuck here. And since that pamphlet is just informative enough to either piss someone off or confuse the hell out of them, I got some questions to anybody that can answer them. Fill in the blanks a little better, if someone who actually knows what's going on has the time.

[He moves to cut the feed, but pauses a second, before leaning back once more.] Oh, and guys, if any of you happen to be here - highly doubtful, but worth a shot - basement.

[And then he finally cuts the feed.]

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For the record, Agent Romanoff, looking for food was the second thing I did. [Because he won't let her have the last word on that.

But he gestures around himself, at the mess everywhere, because for a guy who's been here for two hours tops, he's been very busy. Because there's need to be. If nothing else, when things spur him into action, he can get what needs done done. At his own expense, even.]

Of course I've been busy. From what I hear it's probably the smarter of the two things I could be doing.

Do I even want to ask what the other thing is?

[It's a relief to know that not even Wonderland can change some things. She picks her way through cables, then hops up to perch on the edge of his desk, because that seems the safest place to be for the moment.]

So. Wonderland's apparently a thing. Words I never really thought I'd say, but here we are.

Probably not.

[He's kidding, of course. Or is he. The world will ~~definitely~~ never know.

But in relevance to her statement about Wonderland, she's certainly not wrong. There's been plenty of absolutely crazy things that have happened the last few years, and he really, honestly thought big green rage monster and alien Vikings would take the cake on that one, but...Well. Here they are. In Wonderland.]

That's assuming, of course, this is really Wonderland. As in the true down the rabbit hole, toking Caterpillar Wonderland and less like Space Vikings. So far I've just seen a bunch of people who are more in the dark than I am and I've been here, what. A couple of hours?

I've been here a few days. Still looking for the caterpillar, much to my dismay.

[Her tone is dry to hint that she's kidding. Probably. Maybe. Okay no, not really, she actually had gone looking for the caterpillar.]

And I don't think there's a white rabbit. There's supposedly Queens though, because we totally need a few of those crazies running around. You already found the magic closets, I'm assuming by the mess down here. Did you get the warning about the mirrors? Because that's the creepiest part in my opinion, but then again, your opposite might be great, maybe we can trade you in.

[That time she's kidding, in case her eyeroll doesn't give her away.]

I try not to make assumptions in general but we're definitely somewhere we had no intention of ending up and either way, whoever's in charge seems overly fond of Lewis Carroll's imagination.

[The really sad part is that Tony wouldn't doubt that. It was next on his list of things to do.

But he gives a scoff as he climbs to his feet at the implication they'd trade him in. He knows better.]

Please, he might be a nice guy, but from what I hear, he'd be as dumb as a box of hair on top of it. Good luck with that. But you know, I've been thinking. This place.

[He points down at the floor, looking around.] This place could be like Asgard, right? Just another realm, but it's not really a realm is it. Not the way I've heard it described. It sounds like another planet.

You'd know better than I would, I'm not a scientist. Your theoretical explanations and alternate dimensions are a little over my head. If anything, it sounds like we're stuck in a giant bubble.

[She swings one foot absently against the side of the desk as she watches him, curious as to what he thinks of this place, whether or not he can actually reason a way out.]

The way they explained the boundaries of this place... we don't know what's outside of that. Or if there even is an outside of that, but our space here seems pretty contained. The world is flat after all, except something keeps us from falling off the edges.

I wonder if there's a way to find out. [He looks around again, pulling a face.] Of course there's a way to find out. If it's nothing it's nothing, but I actually kind of doubt that.

[Even if it's a pocket universe. There are boundaries in that scenario, true, but if the science of it is right, and actually works, there are ways to break those boundaries. All it would take would be to find the right leverage.]

Anyway, right now it doesn't matter. If there's anything beyond where we can apparently go, there's something making it so we can't. And I get the lightest little tickle that finding what's doing that isn't going to be as easy as pulling a guide out of the closets.

You mean besides the oh-so-popular answer of 'it's magic'?

[Her voice is dry, because that's the one she's been hearing the most, since it was apparently the easiest explanation for most things around here. Not that that made anything more understandable.]

So Stark. What's your plan?

That explanation's easy to swallow, so I'm not exactly surprised by it. It makes sense, if you think you're actually in Wonderland. I dunno! [He gives an exaggerated shrug.] I dunno, maybe we are.

[He doesn't buy it, but just because his gut tells him there's definitely more to the story, it doesn't make it true. But he'll take what it says over some pamphlet any day.]

My plan? My plan is to get set up here. I can maybe figure it out. If there's an exit, I'll find it. But I need a place to work.

Well, we're certainly not in Kansas. But if we're not in Wonderland, someone's gone to an awful lot of trouble to duplicate an impression of it.

[She nods, digesting that, her expression serious and all business.]

Good plan. Can I assist with anything?

Yeah, but the million dollar question is why.

[And isn't that the truth? Is it to disorient them? Make them submit, go with the flow, offer no resistance? If so, whoever's running this joint is starting to pick the wrong people to try to screw with.]

Eh...Keep people off my back. Let me work. And see if you can find anyone not spouting the magic theory. I got a line on a guy who might be able to prove magic is testable, anyway.

Besides the feeding on memories part? You're guess is as good as mine. Probably better. Maybe just for distraction?

I can do that, although you're pretty out of the way down here. I don't think you should have too much trouble. [There wasn't a lot down in the basement, from what she'd learned, although Tony's quickly turning this place into something interesting.]

Magic seems the prevalent theory I've encountered so far. And everyone's go-to. Maybe because it's so hard to disprove.

Well, to be fair, we're kind of in the minority, on a whole. Just like back home. I mean, I've talked to some really...Out there people in this place so far, but none that seem to be able to rub clues together.

[Which isn't actually an insult, despite how derisive it may sound. Most people have no need to dig in between the cracks for answers.

Normally, anyway.

He pauses, reaching up to rub at his face.]

And I hate to admit it, but despite the universal "it's magic"- [Finger quotes and all.] At least they're willing to spill on the details.

[Unlike certain organizations with really long names, hint hint.]

I met a Musketeer. And Robin Hood. [She manages to point this out with a relatively straight face, one eyebrow arching upwards because this, apparently, is their life now. At least for the unforseeable future.] I think 'out there' might be a slight understatement.

[She has no idea what organization you might be talking about, Tony. None at all.]

That's one thing this place has going for it, I'll admit. I've never had an easier time getting a plethora of information on a mission. They're all very helpful.

Robin Hood. [He makes a thoughtful noise, nodding to himself.] Hey, was he wearing tights? [Because either you're down with the Men In Tights train or you can get out.

But more seriously, he will admit she has a point. People are tripping over themselves to fill him in on the details, clear up the blurry bits left by that pamphlet, and make sure he knows it's something he's going to have to end up disproving.]

Well, don't get too excited about it. I get the feeling that for everything they know and share there's three more things they don't have the slightest clue on. Which is where I'm gonna come in.

I don't know, the phone didn't pan down that far, but if I run into him in person, I'll be sure to report back with an answer.

[She tilts her head to the side, studying him with faint humor.]

And you expect to find all their clues for them? That's comforting.

[In a way, it was. She could predict strategies, tactics. But magic? She wouldn't even know where to start.]

Huh. [He doesn't think he needs to point out how this place is like an acid trip to her, at least.]

Well, do you have a better idea? [He gives an exaggerated shrug.] I've been slammed with a brick wall for the most part. People deciding we're just stuck and have literally just sat back on their thumbs and spun. Being trapped here for years? Not my thing.

So yeah, I'll do what I can for that, anyway.

[Her smile is dry as she shakes her head at his question, lifting her hands in a What-can-you-do? motion.]

Not really mine either, but no one's been helpful enough to point me in the direction of 'Shoot that and we can all go home' this time around. So I've contented myself with learning what I could from the people who have been stuck here for years. Which tells me a lot about Wonderland and that there are a lot of really screwed up universes out there, but not much useful about our little conundrum.

[That's the most frustrating part of everything. They're more than happy to tell you about the events, and the other side of the mirrors, and whatever else, but bring up getting the hell out and it's like the pity switch flips.

It's getting really annoying.]

The thing is, they don't know. They dont know, because from what I can tell, everyone in this place has already given up. [He pushes a piece of the sheetrock from the walls aside with his foot, clearing another path for a cable.]

But the thing is, that's not me. I'm not gonna just roll over and take it. So. Yeah. We'll just have to do the digging ourselves.

Yeah, giving up isn't exactly one of your strong suits is it?

[Something she's grateful to have here, to be perfectly honest.]

Maybe they didn't have the resources or understanding to take it further than where they have? [Or this place really was inescapable unless it decided otherwise, but she wasn't giving much credit to the word 'impossible' here.] Or they've been here long enough they've run out of new ideas to try.

Digging again. Can't I leave the dirty work to the rest of you?

Hey, out of the two of us, which is the guy in the suit and which is a spy. [He won't say as much, of course, because it would be dinging his pride and that's just not going to happen, but she's by far better at playing the part of being nice, friendly, and open than he'll ever be.

Tony Stark is an abrasive asshole, and he doesn't necessarily see that as a bad thing.]

Besides, you do that, and I'll get with Jane Foster and...Maybe between it all is the solution. They may not have the resources, but we do.

[She just laughs at the look he gives her and slides down off the desk.]

I'm only poking fun, Stark. I'll keep interrogating everyone I come across, don't worry. Anything that keeps me out of all the science babble will make me happy, but I'll be sure to pass on everything I find, just in case it's important.

Do that. I'm thinking maybe once I get up and running, we can...I dunno, compile a little database, keep track.

[It's better than sitting around and moaning about it, anyway. Doing that might actually give them what they're looking for because he, for one, doesn't plan on making this an extended stay.]

That would be helpful. [He gets her easy agreement on that one.] A central place where we can put the facts we gather into some semblance of order. Maybe we can start figuring out where these puzzle pieces are supposed to fit together.

Well, that's the plan. Make sure you take good notes.

[Because he's pretty sure she's well aware of how things just kind of slip past him if he doesn't deem it immediately important.]

I'll let you guys know when I'm done down here. Once the walls are up, and cable's laid, it shouldn't take me too long.

001 [video | action for the basement]

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