LOG DATE 7 16 2 [AUDIO]

[slapfight]

[when this message begins broadcasting, it’s very clear the person responsible has NO IDEA this is actually transmitting to a large population. in fact, the shrill voice just sounds like she’s calmly- possibly too calmly- talking to herself.]

Log Date Seven-One-Six-Two.

I seem to have found myself- inexplicably- in some sort of bizarre, unstable dimension. The primary population appears to be Earth humans, though they refer to themselves by specifications rather than the traditional names that humans identify themselves by. What’s more is these humans do not find rain to be…. pleasant, and would prefer to stand in awful, cramped conditions, rather than be out in it.

Earlier I drew the conclusion that these may not be humans at all, but rather some sort of strange herd creature that greatly resembles a standard Earth human. However, before I could test this hypothesis, something happened and I found myself in this strange, and thankfully, much more sizable Earth dwelling, which I am having trouble rationalizing, beyond that clearly the reality of this place is in some sort of state of flux. However, this is purely speculation and that suggests it’s more a fault in my perception of reality, than the reality itself.

As to why I am here, rather than back at the temple, or why this dimension exists, or if any of it is, in fact, real, and I am not so given to my current madness that my vision spheres cannot be trusted…. [a small, pained gulp] I have no idea. I can only continue to document my findings and hope that if the Crystal Gems discover this after I’ve well and truly gone far beyond being helped, they’ll remember that my destruction was entirely their fault.

This is Peridot, further tilting towards madness, signing off for now.

[and the feed clicks, so she can… curl up on the floor in a fetal position and cry for a moment, not realizing that PEOPLE HAVE HEARD THIS.]

Comments

[slapfight]

[Peridot looks mildly taken aback by the PINK PERSON who has found her and stares at her for a moment, despite being... a tiny green thing herself. she squints inquisitively and steps closer, taking in her appearance at all angles.]

What are you? You're not a Gem... And you're clearly not a human.

[monosaccharide]

I'm Princess Bubblegum of the Candy Kingdom in the Land of Ooo. [Because that answers all of the questions.] Gem. [She tilts her head and frowns slightly, studying Peridot intently.]

Ah, so you aren't simply named for the rock, you are the rock. [It is in her forehead. She'd have to test to be sure that's actually what it is, but she suspects Peridot wouldn't consent to having her do that. It's fine. It's a pretty safe guess.] Is the rest of your body organic, or some sort of solidified light deal?

[slapfight]

The Land of Ooo? [she frowns. what planet is that even on. she wants to know. deeply wants to know, but she clearly recognizes what she is and any excuse to be prideful is enough for her. she crosses her arms over her chest.] Solidified light. It's merely a manifestation produced by my gem that allows me to perform my intended function on Homeworld.

[or you know betray her Homeworld and say fuck it to all intended functions. she's still getting used to that.] But if you know about Gems, then how come I've never heard of your planet? Our archives on the colonized planets in the universe are near perfect.

[monosaccharide]

The planet is Earth. But the year is over a thousand past when anyone here is from.

[Fascinating. Solidified light. Oh, the tests she would run on Peridot if.... that weren't extremely unethical.]

Does "Homeworld" have another name? For people who aren't from it.

[slapfight]

It's just the Gem Homeworld. We colonize other planets beyond our galaxy, so it's simpler to refer to our original home as such. [we're conquerers, peebs. that's what we do.

give her a second. wait for it. wait for it.] If you're from the Earth's future... does that mean we successfully stopped the cluster? The Earth is still there?

[GARNET'S STUPID FUTURE VISION HASN'T BEEN ABLE TO HELP ANYONE ABOUT THIS. THANK YOU, STRANGE PINK CREATURE WHO SMELLS LIKE STEVEN'S TOOTHPASTE.]

[monosaccharide]

Well... perhaps. Unfortunately, there are many different versions of Earth represented here, and it's impossible to tell which if any is the past of my Earth. All records from that long ago have been lost.

What's the cluster?

[slapfight]

A geo-weapon made from the forced fusion of millions of gem shards currently incubating in the Earth's mantle that, when fully manifested, will rip apart the Earth and destroy all life on the planet.

[so matter of fact. now that she's no longer... standing on soon to be destroyed earth.]

[monosaccharide]

Well, that certainly hasn't happened in my timeline. Certainly, the planet has gone through many disasters but there is still life on it.

[slapfight]

Good. Then there may actually be some hope for the Earth after all.

[besides the disasters, but well... They're probably not Gem-related.

...Probably.]

[monosaccharide]

There is always hope. Unfortunately, that's not always enough.

[slapfight]

Of course it's not. Hope is an abstract concept- good for morale, but utterly useless at solving problems- something my, erm... [why is friends so hard to say] fellow Crystal Gems [wow that was even harder to say wtf] have a hard time grasping without me.

[monosaccharide]

More solid light rock peeps? [She doesn't know what a Crystal Gem is... in the non-obvious sense, at least.]

It's true, hope is mostly just good for getting people moving. Doesn't replace actual effort and thinking at all.

[slapfight]

Rebel "solid light rock.... peeps." [she squints as she speaks the word, uncertain of the term.] And due to my Diamond not thinking practically, I've become one of them.

[a choked laugh escapes her. she's still... dealing with that.] Oh my stars, I deserve this place for being a traitorous clod.

[monosaccharide]

[This is already fascinating. Why is the diamond in charge?]

Look, if your leader isn't behaving rationally, you're entirely within your right to stage a rebellion. [Not something that Bubblegum's in much danger of. She's always rational.] I mean, obviously, it's dangerous, but necessary sometimes. Leaders need to be intelligent, or they're not worthy of the throne.

[slapfight]

[she sinks to the floor, laughing a little in a way that is not, altogether, sane.] Exactly! That's my point! She's supposed to be the most rational, logical, efficient ruler in all the galaxy, and I realize I'm just a lowly peridot and she's Yellow Diamond, but my reports were thorough. T-to just write me off like that! She deserved everything I told her and...

[worthy of the throne? her laugh becomes hoarse.] But to say she's not worthy of her throne when she's the only reason I even exist in the first place... Who else would rule if not the Diamonds? I haven't thought this through- and I know they haven't, so caught up in their singing and friendship and beliefs that have no basis in actual fact.

[monosaccharide]

Singing and friendship is important too. [She knows this, even if she's been pushing away her friends as of late and certainly hasn't had time for singing.]

Look, I'm a princess. I rule over the Candy Kingdom. I built it from the ground up and created all my subjects out of sugar and science. They are all very loyal to me. But I am loyal to them as well. I have a responsibility to protect and guide them, and I take it very seriously. Any good ruler knows that she can only expect as much loyalty from her subjects as she is willing to give.

[slapfight]

[well, yes, it is, but not as important. it was part of the sum of the equation that made Earth worth protecting, but it certainly wasn't the whole of everything. it just... made her feel good. in a way that transcended her programming.

Peridot's mulling all that over a Bubblegum speaks, uncovering her face to look her over, taking in a few things from all that. she's equivelent to a Diamond on her Earth then. that's... strange.]

But you're so..... [she blinks steadily.] small.

[taller than her, but there are large cats taller than she is.]

[monosaccharide]

[She raises an eyebrow.]

...if size determines leadership, that explains a great deal about the shortcomings of your planet's hierarchy.

[A beat.]

Pun not intended. But pretty funny.

[slapfight]

[HUMOR. HUMOR SHE GETS. her hands fall away from her face as she breaks into an easy (if not extremely loud) laugh at the joke. it's easier to just laugh at that than to explain complicated gemetics, which she could do. in extreme detail.]

Shortcomings. That's great.

[monosaccharide]

[Bubblegum smiles. People don't... always laugh at her jokes since she is not great at them.]

Anyway, yes, I am in charge, height notwithstanding. We aren't gems. We're candy people. It's a different system entirely.

[slapfight]

Well, if you weren't a logical and [she presses her mouth in a firm line and then grits her teeth] compassionate leader, I doubt you could honestly expect your subjects to be able to rebel against you and succeed.

[you, uh, see her point here, peebs.]

[monosaccharide]

That's... true. [The candy people are many things, but competent at..... anything is not one of them.] But if I weren't logical and compassionate, most of my subjects would never have been made, so the point is a bit moot.

[slapfight]

Not really. [her expression is clouded.] Yellow Diamond made me, and it didn't take much to get me to turn on her.

[Not "much." just a lot of well-thought out research on Earth that got overridden by her Diamond's pettiness.] After doing nothing else but obeying her my entire life. [she slouches a bit.] And I just... threw that away for one planet.

[monosaccharide]

One planet's a pretty big thing. [She tilts her head, looking sympathetic.] What happened?

[slapfight]

[Peridot still isn't used to sympathy of any kind and she immediately tries to brush it off, her cheeks turning bluish in what... seems to be her approximation of blushing. despite not having capillaries. idk what you want here. #science] It's... not relevant to the current situation. I shouldn't have brought it up.