video } you call the shots you can do what you want to oh just imagine the freedom

[krmvgivv]

[Like everyone, Dipper looks a little different. When he speaks, it's calmly and confidently and with a certain quality that makes you want to actually sit up and listen. It is... dare I say, a speech worthy of a diplomacy 18 check.]

Hey everyone. Peridot already explained the setting, and I think I can explain the rest. Have you noticed everything feeling a little more... random than usual? Because the costumes, my new ears, the weapons I definitely shouldn't know how to use and sometimes do, and oh yeah, the part where I can do magic...

[He whirls around, sending some magic missiles at an injector drill. He grins.]

So. Cool. But yeah, besides the setting this definitely is coming straight out of a Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons game. I think it's from our world because this is exactly how I looked that time Grunkle Ford and I were transformed by [There's something weird about the wizard's name. Like he just can't quite remember what... ah. It's their missing word. Great. He forces out the only name he can think of in connection to the wizard, even though he knows it's not quite right. Definitely their world.] Probabilitizzle the Annoying.

So yeah, have fun! And if your actions start feeling weirdly more... random than usual? That's part of the fun. Never know when you're gonna crit fail or get a nat 38, right? Just try to keep all your HP and you'll be fine.

[ooc: responses will be coming from draziw!]

Comments

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[charlastan]

Wait, so this already happened to you and Ford? Is this one of those weirdo future things I haven't lived through yet? Is this gonna happen to me?

[Stan asks the important questions.]

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[draziw]

Sort of. You and Mabel are doing the playing, Ford and I were the pieces. [Dipper grimaces and tugs on his own pointy ear.] But you didn't actually get the costume change.

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[charlastan]

I dunno how that happened, but there is absolutely no way that could've possibly gone well.

[Not if Stan and Mabel were the players anyway. Not with all the math involved. Ew.]

[video]

[punful]

[The weird thing is that Sans opened up this post in a bit of a Sans-level panic, which mostly just looks like a lot of sweating to the layperson. But after that speech? Huh. He actually feels kind of better.]

[In any case, there's a sweaty, stout human on the screen, wearing robes and looking extremely uncomfortable. There's what appears to be a hotdog-shaped insignia embroidered on the front of his robes. He speaks in a lazy drawl, but there's no trace of Comic Sans.]

Uh, so Dipper, I think uh. I think I'm a Cleric. Uh. How does one be a Cleric? Because I know Bard pretty well, but...

[But heals? Seriously? Whose idea of a sick joke is this, making Sans the healer?]

[video]

[draziw]

[It's a good thing he's got a hot dog and a general... Sans shape. Dipper squints for a second, but then he makes the connection (wisdome 17).]

Sans? Uh, it's not too different. I mean, you're still mainly a support class so like, buffs and healing. It's wisdom-based instead of charisma-based, and you're generally dedicated to some deity... though it looks like you're dedicated to hotdogs. [Or a god of hotdogs? He doesn't know.] Oh, and you have to prepare spells rather than casting spontaneously. But you have access to way more! You just have to choose ahead of time which ones you're gonna cast.

[video]

[deadshapes]

[There's a bright-eyed, rambunctious-looking human grinning ear to ear on Dipper's feed now.]

Dude, you brought us a D&D event! Or whatever the thing you said! I always thought D&D was kinda nerdy, but check this out!

[She turns to the side, waves a hand, and one of the injectors gets utterly FUCKED by a fireball. Mae just starts cackling.]

I don't even mind that all my fur is gone! This is the coolest thing that's ever happened to me!

[video]

[draziw]

[Dipper figured out Sans pretty well, but apparently he's a little more thrown by these changes (wis 5). He stares at her, blinks, and shakes his head.]

Uh, sorry, who are you again? Someone who... usually has fur? [That could be a few people.]

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[mr_englishguy]

[On the camera, Newt looks fairly normal. Linen shirt and waistcoat, curious and intent. No different than he most often looks. At least from the angle of the camera.]</small. When you speak of crit fails and HP, can you explain that please, Dipper? I'm quite curious about all of the changes and, this being Wonderland, how they can be used against us.

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[draziw]

Right, right, so uh, HP are hit points. You lose some whenever you get hurt, and if you lose all of them you pass out and if you don't roll to stabilize within ten rounds, you die. Crit fail is when you roll a 1 and you fail really, really badly. It's sometimes pretty hilarious? But like, it also usually is happening to a character you're playing, not actually to you. It's probably... less funny when it's actually you.

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[powerofmabel]

[in the most adorable turn of events ever, the twins kinda match in their precious elfin attire. As Mabel digs around in her... cheeseburger backpack.]

So what do cheeseburgers have to do with elves and math and stuff? [her backpack is definitely making noises.] Come here, little guy...

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[draziw]

Maybe that's from Peridot's half? [He'll have to ask her. He's not sure what backpacks have to do with mutant gems either.] I mean, it does seem like a kindergarten thing--is yours moving?

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[determinedest]

[So he does have HP in his world. Just...not in the way they're familiar with.]

Do you have...MP too?

[CP, Zacharie called it. But he'd also given the impression that not everyone would call it that.]

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[draziw]

[Dipper looks puzzled, but (wiz 18) he can guess.]

Is that... magic points? No, though some classes might have something similar. Mostly, you just have a certain amount of spells you can cast in a day based on your level and whatever stat is your spellcasting stat. [He touches his chest, going for affected modesty but really kind of looking smug.] I'm a wizard, so for me that's intelligence. Higher intelligence means more spells.

[audio]

[agentxthirteen]

Given that I've never played Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons, I have some questions.

[ Sharon inhales enough that, if the comm picks up the sound, it may convey a slight sense of frustration. ]

What's HP?

[ In all seriousness, though, she has so little familiarity with what's going on. She knows, instinctively, how to use her bow, but she's a whole head shorter than she usually is. She hasn't been this short in a while. It's throwing her off, to say the least, which happens to add to how irritated and frustrated this event is making her. ]

Can we die here?

[ The shortness she can get a handle on eventually, though. No, what's really bothering her is the fact that she woke up with most of her clothes gone. Wood elves, apparently, do not have use for a huge amount of clothes, and she's covered in what she considers to be flimsy armor and body paint. Surrounded by people she knows. That are going to know her when she wakes up.

Whoever designed this game can die on her arrow's tip.

This is ridiculous.

Not that she's freaking out. Her clothes are too revealing for her to freak out. But she's definitely not happy. ]

How is anything random supposed to be fun?

[audio]

[draziw]

[That's a lot of questions. Dipper can try, though.]

Hit points or health, I don't know but suggest trying not to, and most games have some element of random chance? I mean, there's also a lot of strategy, math, and imagination involved, but this way you don't know what's gonna happen until you roll.

[sciencelizard]

Dipper!!

[Alphys is like, over the moon at this entire exchange. Look at her cute kitsune face in her cool new robes. She is seriously thrilled, but doesn't think much for introducing herself at first, forgetting she's not her normal brand of nonhuman.]

This is amazing! It's so much better than cosplay because the magic works I'm f-freaking out.

[draziw]

[Luckily, Dipper's seen her drawings and knows Alphys well enough that she doesn't need to introduce herself (wis 17).]

Woah, Alphys! Are you your actual character from game?

[video]

[mrsarcastic003]

Is it weird to feel excited? I'm feeling a little excited.

[Warlocks and Warriors, man.]

[video]

[draziw]

I mean, it's Wonderland, so it's probably gonna be awful, but... [He grins.] I'm a little excited too.

[mcgucket]

Pro-what now?

[Who the fuck has a name like that, wonders Fiddleford McGucket.]

[draziw]

You know! The wizard guy! On the box? [That is not the name, but it's not that far off. He thinks?] You've played, right?

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[ssmisery]

What's a fiend?

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[draziw]

Creatures from hell, mostly. Why?

[audio]

[didntknowbest]

Hm. I suppose that would explain why my magic seems to be a great deal more powerful here. And also why I appear to be some kind of humanoid dragon, now. That is why I thought it best to just communicate via voice, I did not want to alarm you.

Still- you have been very helpful and informative, young one! Thank you!

[audio]

[draziw]

Aren't you usually a giant goat lady? Like, no offense, but I think that's just as alarming as a dragonborn.

[A beat. That was... probably really rude.]

I mean, not that I find you alarming! I'm just saying, I'm not really easily... alarmed.