Video - Backdated to 10/27

[charlastan]

[Stan thinks he's so clever. He's cocky enough that he comes on the network and laughs.]

Ha! This place thinks it can trip me up with some truth-telling nonsense. These things ain't that hard to get around - all you gotta do is say something that's technically true and you can get away with whatever you want! Like that time my great niece shoved truth teeth in my mouth while I was sleeping and I purposefully blurted out uncomfortable and disgusting things to make sure my niblings wouldn't want to actually ask me any questions!

[You could hear a pin drop in the moment after that sentence.]

...Wait. That's not what I wanted to-- oh, goddamn it!

[He didn't really want to cuss either, but the event is making him say exactly what he means, so he scrambles to shut the camera off immediately.]

Comments

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[mviw]

[He's just laughing his ass off.]

BOTH, PROBABLY

[charlastan]

CAN IT!

[mviw]

[LAUGHS HARDER]

Hey--hey Stan. Watch your damn language!

[Ford snickers again.]

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[onetruemorty]

Yeah, getting the time to stop and think around it is what really gets you. I've, I've been just trying to do a lot through texting if I can't avoid someone, you know? It's extra time to get that leg up on telling the whole truth about something all at once.

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[charlastan]

That's not a bad idea! And if you do send something that you're gonna regret, you can pitch your little phone thing as far out into the ocean as you can and it won't be your problem anymore! That's what I'd do!

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[onetruemorty]

Wh-- you know it still sent even if you throw the phone in the ocean, right? Someone's still gonna get the message. I feel like I really need to know that you know that, 'cause there's... still gonna be a problem.

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[seasonforpeaches]

[look. this is urgent. a text is just a lot more simple to connect to, and she needs answers. even though she's... a talker.]

So THAT'S what's going on! Is it something in the air? Have you tried texting? There's gotta be a loophole of sorts. Let's find one!

Oh—not that I have anything to hide! I mean, naturally I am a bit nervous that I might just blurt something out,
but it's not so bad to imagine seeing as how my entire existence is kind of embarrassing at times.

[that's not something she'd ever admit out loud. taylor is proud and has accepted her strangeness. it isn't a front! not... always, anyway?]

text [2/2]

[seasonforpeaches]

[seconds later]

...texting isn't a loophole btw

text

[charlastan]

GOOD TO KNOW. ALSO YOU SOUND LIKE A TEENAGER.

[Something about the optimism and the whole being embarrassed about her existence. At some point, Stan just got too old for any of the shame he had left.]

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[naughty_nurse]

... I'm confused now.

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[charlastan]

About what? The event or my great niece and nephew forcing magic dentures on me? To be fair that second one ain't exactly the most normal thing to happen to somebody.

[He doesn't really want to ask but oh well. Cat's out of the bag now.]

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[naughty_nurse]

Both, I think... M-Maybe I shouldn't ask, this is none of my business!

[scoutsniper]

The 'truth teeth'?

[Frank is going to get to the important stuff.]

[charlastan]

Yep! They're these weirdo dentures and when you put 'em in your mouth you can only tell the truth, but it's kinda "pick your own truth" - as long as you say something that's true you could prolly get away with anything!

[He laughs a bit, like this is a funny thing that happened.]

She wanted me to stop lyin' so much so I went on and on about gross old person things and the inevitability of death until she got sick of it. I even almost got myself arrested just to prove a point!

[A pause.]

...Actually, the arresting was really because I tried to teach a bear how to drive. But I could've gotten away with it if I hadn't wanted her to admit the whole truth teeth thing was a bad idea.

[scoutsniper]

Sounds fucked up.

[In so many ways. So, so many ways. ]

You tried to teach. A bear. How to drive. [Uh, last time they talked he'd thought this guy was sensible. Now, he's not so sure.]

Are you supposed to be taking meds or something?

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[krmvgivv]

[There's a stunned silence before Dipper replies.]

...okay, in hindsight I probably should have guessed that.

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[charlastan]

[Stan shrugs. No point in hiding it now even if he could.]

Probably. You two had been around me long enough to know better by then.

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[krmvgivv]

I mean, we did think you didn't believe in magic at the time. Cause that was another thing you were lying about constantly. Even though it would have been nice to have an adult actually believe me about this stuff before the zombies tried to eat us.

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[powerofmabel]

I KNEW IT!

[Deep down. But she didn't want to believe Stan would intentionally be such a jerk. But because she wanted to believe it wasn't true and self-delusion doesn't matter to this event, she has to admit that part of her knows her Grunkle Stan is that much of a jerk.]

I DIDN'T WANNA KNOW IT, BUT I DID!

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[charlastan]

Yeah, I mean. I was never gonna say it, but it ain't exactly a shocker, Pumpkin. The sky's blue. The grass is green. Your Grunkle Stan's gonna lie when given the chance even if he can only do it via half-truths because you put gross forest dentures in his mouth.

[He shrugs kind of helplessly, though to his credit he does look like he actually feels a little bad that she's upset.]

[powerofmabel]

I'd feel more betrayed, but, honestly, you telling any kind of truth is terrifying, so this is gonna be a long weekend.

[video forever]

[mydude]

Ha! Guess it ain't as easy as you thought, huh? Of course, I'm no stranger to saying stupid shit.

[Taako makes a face. Clearly that last bit was unintentional.

Welp. Case in point.]

[video forever]

[charlastan]

Ha! Looks like it's got you too, smartass!

[That isn't even Stan being forced into honesty. It's exactly how he would say it if he wasn't cursed to tell the truth.]

[fancylad]

[Okay, Angus can't help but giggle a little at that. Even though normally he'd politely hold it back, or save it for when the video isn't recording...]

It sounds like you have an extremely serious problem with lying, sir! I'd say I'm a very honest boy, but that would be a lie! Lying to adults is the only way to survive a conversation with them!

[Oh. Right. The event affects him, too. Well, guess that's what Angus gets for laughing at the old man.]

[charlastan]

[If it helps, Stan doesn't think twice about it. That was the case when he was a kid and his opinion has only grown stronger since then.]

Pfft. Lying's the only way to survive a conversation with anyone. Also yep, I sure do! I've been lying to every single person I've ever met since I was younger than you, Pipsqueak. I'm the least trustworthy person you'll ever meet!

[To be fair, while he wouldn't outright say this, he does feel like it's particularly obvious to anyone with even half a brain, so it isn't quite as bad as some of the other things he's blurted out.]