[video] the most punderful time of the year

[punful]

[Sans is out at his hotdog stand, apparently oblivious to the growing cold. His black cat, 4, is a lot less oblivious, considering he's curled up in Sans's hood. He's peering dubiously at the camera while Sans fiddles with condiments. This is the first time Sans has really been out in public since the last event.]

probably only a couple more days till wonderland throws the holidays at us, huh? gonna be my third one, personally. wonder how bad it's gonna be this time. last year we didn't sleep and kept waking up in a wonderland where everyone was brainwashed. year before that, i almost froze to death. despite, yanno, bein' a skeleton.

[Sans sets about toasting a few hotdog buns on the grill behind him.]

hey, so...indulge me. if you could have any one thing for gyftmas, or christmas, or whatever you celebrate--what would it be? no limits. could be purely conceptual or intangible. just any one thing.

...and hey, if you wanna give a sarcastic answer, feel free. think we've all had enough truth or dare where you can't pick dare lately, after all. i'm just curious.

Comments

[nomorules]

Not a story with a happy ending?

_{[He can only guess as much, given Sans' short and sweet responses on the subject. And he could understand that--he'd exchanged a shitty father for friends that are like his family now, an undeniable trade up.]}

I can get that. You can't choose your family, but you can choose who's worth surrounding yourself with.

_{[Ryuji cocks his head in inquisitive concern. Is Sans like Akechi--had he died in a timeline of someone from his world? Ryuji is a believer in "choose your own" adventure over a tale with a concrete beginning and end; even if something like that had happened, Sans can't--couldn't--just roll over and accept it.]}

Whaddya mean? I say break it anyways. Nothing's set in stone.

_{[Not fate--and not even dying, as Wonderland's so helpfully proven.]}

[punful]

[He shrugs again.] got papyrus out of it, so it's not all bad.

[The best thing they ever did was have Papyrus.]

yeah. exactly. the people you choose to connect with, that's what really counts.

[The people you decide are your family.]

[He looks away again and gives a quiet, resigned sigh.]

heh. just not that simple.

[nomorules]

Why not?

_{[He's not one to take "complicated" at face value. Pluck from it what he doesn't need, and redefine it as "simple," more like. Sans is better off shutting the line of inquiry down if he doesn't want Ryuji making achievable goals out of Sans' absolutes.]}

I don't believe we gotta go back to the exact moment we left without rememberin' anythin' like everyone says. Wonderland decided on the rules, I sure as hell didn't agree to follow 'em. It's just a matter of figurin' out how it screws with time and makin' it do what we want instead, right? Like maybe send us back to whatever time we want instead.

If you know somethin' bad's gonna happen, you could take what you know and change things.

[punful]

...some rules it don't matter if you don't want to follow them. like gravity. you can't just decide not to obey gravity.

[Even flying isn't quite the same as disobeying gravity. You have to come back to earth eventually.]

[If you know something bad's gonna happen... He gives a quiet sigh.]

some things just can't be changed, no matter how much--foresight you have.

[nomorules]

Dude. You're a talkin' skeleton in a world that don't believe up is down half the time and dead people don't stay dead. Rules are just rules until somebody breaks 'em.

_{[Was Sans always a prophet of doom type or did he just not notice until now?]}

If you really need this thing to change, you'll find a way. There's always a way.

[punful]

[He's not built for this. He's never been good at optimism. He's jokes and memes and distractions from how shitty everything is, because that's more fun than thinking about how literally nothing can ever change.]

[Not unless he retains all these memories when he goes home, and actually talks to Frisk, asks them the right questions. But it just doesn't work like that.]

[He grins, and it looks genuine.]

you're a real hopeful type, huh? world needs more like that.

[More like Ryuji, more like Papyrus. Less Sans. No one needs more Sans.]

[nomorules]

_{[He's seen pessimists try to grin through the pain before and it's never pretty...]}

It ain't just hope--there's some hella hard work in there, too!

_{[You have to be willing to give a lot to get a lot. Anyone can say they want things to change, but to mean it, really mean it, and go out and do it, it takes a lot to break the chains that bind people to the status quo.]}

What do you need to change? Maybe it'd help to brainstorm if I knew more.

[punful]

nah, yeah. i know. hard work.

[That's the thing, isn't it? It's not just optimism. It's hard work. Lots of hard work, every single day, every single moment, and god, it's hard enough just surviving. And half the time back home, he doesn't.]

i appreciate it, but i'm good. don't worry about me, yeah?

[nomorules]

Yeah! Hard work!

_{[They're agreeing, right? So why does it seem like they're still talking apples and oranges? Ryuji's onto you, Sans.]}

No deal! Of course I'm gonna worry.

[punful]

guess i can't stop you.

[His loss. He'll learn sooner or later that Sans isn't worth this kind of effort.]

anyway. i got hotdogs to sell.

[nomorules]

_{[Points to eyes, points to you. He's giving you a break because you've had a rough go of it, skull bro, but don't think Ryuji's satisfied for a minute with that passive Kanye shrugging.]}

This ain't over! And I don't say that lightly 'cause I like hotdogs. Chin up, pal, the ain't as scary as it seems. Promise!

[punful]

see you around, ryuji.