[video forever]

[shrimpheavennow]

[Eleanor isn't...great about being vulnerable as it is. But it's even worse knowing how many people she's about to open up to. So she takes a deep breath before she actually speaks, letting it out in a slow sigh. And gives the most forced smile ever.]

So...hi. I uh. I was gone, for a bit. Went back to my world and stuff happened and now I'm here again. And it kind of means my memory is all over the place, because, surprise, Michael reset my memory again while I was back there. And I'm kind of...having a hard time. I can't even remember which room was mine.

[Eugh, that was so honest and sincere. She closes her eyes, as if it doesn't count if she isn't looking. Honestly it doesn't work at all, and she stares into the camera again, expression tight.]

Just. What do you guys do to like...ignore how fucked up the inside of your head is? Fuck, nobody else is probably dealing with this. My point is I need a distraction, or maybe a head injury. Suggestions welcome. So. Bye, I guess.

[She scowls, annoyed at how that fell apart at the end, but. Fuck, she tried, right?]

Comments

private.

[waitin]

The inside of my head is pretty fucked up. Usually I try to spend time with people I care about who care about me. Or I destroy everything in the destruction room to get some feelings out. ...or I have a drink even though I'm sixteen.

( her arms fold loosely across her chest. )

...but I'm grateful to say I haven't had my memories messed with like that. Yet.

I'm sorry.

[private forever]

[shrimpheavennow]

After the last time I was here, I'm done with trying to drink shit away, I think.

[She...isn't sure she has anyone here who cares about her, actually. She can't find Michael, and honestly she isn't sure how she feels about the guy right now. Her head's a mess, and while she knows he was trying to help, right now she's just annoyed about it.]

...We have a destruction room?

[waitin]

Yeah, it doesn't really seem to help. Just makes it easier to turn things off for a little bit.

( But eventually, it wears off, and that's that. Clementine nods at the second question. She thought about making a post more recently since it's been awhile since they originally made the room, but- )

I made it with a friend here awhile ago. It's a room we made with a lot of shit that's really breakable and lots of weapons to break all of it. It's pretty...cathartic.

[shrimpheavennow]

Sounds like it. I guess real destruction is better than self destruction. Although sometimes they're probably the same.

[Like when she set an ex-boyfriend's Xbox on fire. Not that she understood at all that that was self destructive at the time.]</ small>

It sounds like a nice distraction, though. Thanks for mentioning it.

And, um, if you ever want to talk. It turns out I'm kind of a great person to talk things out with, despite my whole...everything. It really sucks that you're feeling fucked up already. But I've been there. Probably not the same exact there, but you know. Definitely didn't have an ideal childhood.

[twirlier]

You too, huh? I just barely woke up to find myself back here. It's... The world's ending back home.

[Which makes her sad but she sees no reason to hide the truth of her world.]

I'm hoping to find an idea of how myself. I had a whole year to get Hell out of my head before, but now I've had so many more years there that it seems part of me.

[She admits in a low voice, shrugging as if there's nothing to do about it.]

[shrimpheavennow]

Wait, you went to Hell too?

[Except, like, the real one. As opposed to the experiment Michael was running.]

Uh, we should probably talk about that sometime. But if you just got back here too, it'd probably be healthier to take a break. Maybe. Hopefully there's no events anytime soon.

[twirlier]

[Misty stares at Eleanor, stunned.] You've been there too? I'm so sorry. But yes. I would, actually, sometime. I mean, everyone feels bad but they don't all know what it's like. Especially since I have questions for you about someone that came for me there. [Because talks of Michaels, this should go well.]

Video

[oneagainstall]

Welcome back.

[And he means that gruff as he says it. He likes Eleanor and he's been worried about her.]

The fuck is with all the memory resting, Jesus. He's gonna fry your fuckin' brain or something. Anyhow. I usually get fuckin' hammered. That's always a good workaround for shit like that.

Re: Video

[shrimpheavennow]

It was part of a plan to convince someone we deserved to go to the good place. I'd probably be fine if I didn't get my memories back from being here, because that means I remember shit from before the reset and then a life where I didn't know anything at all until recently. Turns out remembering alternate timelines is much more of a headache than having them described to you. Kinda not surprised he got tripped up so many times.

[She winces.]

Yeah uh. Part of the reason I sorta disappeared before I actually disappeared was an alcohol related mistake so. Not so sure I'm ready for that again. As very tempting as it is.

Video

[oneagainstall]

[Gren listens, brow furrowed. That sounds completely and utterly batshit, even to him where the batshit was ordinary. ]

Fuckin' hell, Eleanor, that's fucked up. I mean...shit I get that it was in your best interests, but Wonderland's gone and made it a fuckin' mess. Jesus.

[He wishes he could help her, but Gren has a limited amount of help to give.]

Well. If it ain't alcohol all I got otherwise is beating the shit outta something or someone. Does that work for you? ...Guess we can talk to. Or...I dunno. You talk, I listen, or whatever.

° video

[beautifullies]

Welcome back, Eleanor, I suppose. It's confusing, I do agree with you. Talking it out helps, so you've taken a good first step.

[ Claire pauses, then backtracks just a little. ]

You and I met during an event. I took you to the clinic to recuperate, do you remember?

[shrimpheavennow]

Uh, yeah. I do. You were...way nicer than I deserved.

[She sighs, running a hand through her hair.]

I uh, do think talking might help, yeah. I'm not sure I'll get it straight if I don't.

[beautifullies]

Everyone deserves basic decency.

[ Claire's always lived by that. Or she's tried to, anyway. ]

I realize we don't know one another that well, but sometimes those are the best people to speak to. If you'd ever like to, I would be more than happy, anytime you'd like. It isn't as if there's much happening day to day that would keep me from it.

Video

[breakthecurse]

U-Um! Please don't injure yourself! A head injury probably won't help very much...

[There's something about this woman's rough nature that strikes a nostalgic chord for Tohru. She's known many people like that, and most of them have been kind underneath it.]

I think I can understand a little bit though. I just arrived in Wonderland, but I was told that I used to be here once before. Only...I don't remember any of it. The whole thing is a little confusing and very strange, especially when meeting people who used to know me the last time I was here. But from what I've noticed, people will be very kind about helping, even if someone's memories are a little mixed up.

[shrimpheavennow]

Yeah, people are like, really good about coming together when they're stuck together, surprisingly. That's, uh, one thing I definitely remember.

[Eleanor frowns at her. She doesn't seem familiar.]

How long ago were you here?

[breakthecurse]

I think Souji said it's been about four years? It's really strange to think about. After all, four years ago from my perspective would have been elementary school! But someone remembers me exactly the age I am now, and hasn't seen me in four years...time works so oddly here.

[She really does wish she could remember it herself. She's been hoping that it will jsut come back to her, but so far nothing like that has happened.]

[choosetruth]

Do you really think you're the only one with a fucked up head?

[Georgia raises an eyebrow behind her sunglasses.]

I have 97% of my memories, so that's not quite the same. Only I'm also extremely aware that technically speaking, they aren't my memories. They're the memories of the woman I think I am.

[Are you following so far?]

You're not alone.

[shrimpheavennow]

I mean, I wasn't trying to compete with anybody, but. Uh.

[Cough.]

You win?

[She follows, she thinks, but isn't sure what one part means.]

You think you're a woman you're not?

[choosetruth]

Oh, no I am her. [Her lip twitches, the only hint she knows how frustrating she's being.] But she was never me.

video;

[thevulnerability]

[ That bit about having her memory reset was weird but... Not the priority right now so Chloe is putting a pin in that. ]

I was pretty mixed up when I came back. A lot had happened. [ She can at least relate that much, although she didn't have any memory problems. ] It'll get better. [ Probably. ] You're more than welcome at Lux, if you want a drink or some music. I can't play the piano for you, though, unless you want your ears to bleed.

[shrimpheavennow]

Music. No drinks. Main thing I remember from last time I was here was how drinking was a bad idea.

[It only took her hundreds of years to figure that out.]

But, uh, I remember you being cool, so. If you're cool with hanging out with me while I stare off into space trying to get my head straightened out, y'know. That'd be cool.

[thevulnerability]

[ Eleanor is a weird one, that's for sure, but Chloe is used to Weird by now and she's not about to make her struggle through anything on her own. At least she learned a lesson about drinking, though. ]

I've got Coke. I'll even throw some cherries in if that will help. [ She smiles. If nothing else, she can Mom her for a little while. ] Come on over.

a late tag in so i hope you don't mind!

[madehervows]

[One part of this definitely catches her attention and she'll get to it in a moment, but first.]

Wine, usually. Though, last time Wonderland sent me home, I returned with all the knowledge that comes with owning a bar, so that gave some variety.

[She certainly doesn't look like the kind who would own a crappy bar, so.]

all tags are good tags

[shrimpheavennow]

Man, it's kind of depressing how many of us default to booze.

[And yet she was supposedly in the Bad Place before?]

I'm kind of avoiding drinking for now, I think. For one, I think it'll just make my brain more confusing. For another I did stupid shit the last time I drank here.

[madehervows]

Five years will do that to a person.

[Regina nods, though.]

Fair enough. It works better when you aren't recovering from a memory curse.