✫ 001 [video]

[sciencelizard]

[The camera turns on upside-down seems to be shaking quite a bit, focusing in on a scaly yellow face heavily biting her lip. It seems to be rapidly moving or otherwise broken until it gets placed on a nearby table and stabilizes, though still… upside down. Thankfully, the device isn’t broken- Alphys’ hands can be seen in-view, shaking. She appears to be outside, but the camera is only showing her torso to her eyes.]

Uh, h-hello! Is anyone there? U-Uhm, t-this is, this is Dr. Alphys! I don’t, uh, I don’t know where I am. And, if this is s-some sort of joke, I don’t appreciate…

[She trails off, getting close to the camera again and finally turning it right side up, lifting it off the table and back to a close-up of her face.] I’ve never even s-seen a device like this before… I think it’s broadcasting somewhere? I bet t-thats what that light does. What h-happens when I do—

[The feed cuts out. She hit the power.]

Comments

video

[determinedest]

Alphys!

[Frisk hastened to reply the moment they saw the lizardlike monster pop up on the feed, scrambling to answer back.]

It's - there's a network here and it's kind of like, um, like UnderNet.

video

[sciencelizard]

[The feed turns back on, pointing at her nose for a second before showing her face in-focus.]

Frisk! Y-You're here too? Do you know where this place is? [She looks over her shoulder just in case she somehow recognized the atmosphere, all of a sudden. It doesn't work, so she turns her attention back to the camera.]

So uhm, where is this p-place, anyway? Is everyone here?

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[doods]

[ A reptile doctor... sometimes this dimension is truly amazing. ]

Heheh. I guess when you do that it turns off? Don't worry, dude, you'll get the hang of it in no time. But being here's definitely not a joke, either. Sorry.

video

[sciencelizard]

[The feed sputters back on, this time more clearly showing Alphys' face.]

I-I guess so! Good to know t-there's a button for that...

[She still seems a little crestfallen knowing this isn't some kind of prank, though.] So uhm... this isn't really home, then.

video

[brainmeme]

Whoa, you're a lizard! [That's so cool! Amethyst decides she wants in on this action and, after a brief show of light, turns into a purple-tongued skink.]

Hiss hiss. Wait, that's snakes. What sound does a lizard make? --Besides just talking.

video

[sciencelizard]

[She turns the feed back on, sees this, and screams, dropping the device to the ground. You can see her little feeties for a moment before she grabs it back up.]

H-how did you do that?? I mean, I'm a m-monster, really, but I k-kind of look like w-what you-- how did you do that

[She's fascinated but also oh god]

[video]

[punful]

[Oh man, look who it is! Does this mean the Meme Squad is complete? Or is this a timeline where she doesn't know him/barely knows him/who even knows anymore? Better to be careful. Sans is always careful. Sorta.]

well, even by my standards, if this is a joke it's not all that funny.

[video]

[sciencelizard]

[Well, luckily for Sans, she does in fact know who he is! It'll be party time when she stops freaking out about where she's located.]

Sans! I-It's so good to see you. [She pauses for a second, suppressing a little grin.] Well, I guess you w-would be the authority on jokes. So, uh, good to know this isn't one. Though... I t-thought I had just seen you, recently... h-how were you here, and there?

video (I'M SORRYYYYYYY)

[liloldme]

A doctor?

You're a...lizard doctor? Oh my goodness. I musta hit my head harder than I thought.


[ staring at you is a giant fluff of hair attached to a small child. what in the diddly poop, man! You're a lizard in a lab coat! We just needs a second. ]

video (IM SO FUCKING GLAD HONESTLY)

[sciencelizard]

And you're, uhm... a h-human, right? I mean, I've seen s-some humans. You look like them! But you've got, uh, a l-lot more hair, than the humans I know.

[Alphys you sound ridiculous. Then again, so does Gideon, a little bit.]

video;

[monosaccharide]

[Aww it sounds like Bubblegum's people. She's wearing her lab coat when she answers, giving Dr. Alphys a smile.] What sort of doctor are you?

video;

[sciencelizard]

[She blushes a little nervously.] W-Well, uhm, it's a d-doctorate, actually, so not that kind of doctor... but, uhm, I am a scientist! I mean, I-I do science. Mostly mechanical engineering, but, uh, I've also done some... [She pauses for a second like she's searching for a way to say this.] Organic c-chemistry? Biology. I've, uh, dabbled. In some other s-science.

But, uh, not a d-doctor, like, healing doctor. A-are you?

video;

[onetruemorty]

Oh, jeez. Uh. I-I hope you figure out turning it back on? It's basically just a-- just a broadcaster, like you thought. You know, a phone and all. People can answer a lot of questions on these once you, when you get it up and running. Boy, that crazy technology, huh?

video;

[sciencelizard]

[Sure enough, she gets it back on! It's even focused on her face a little better this time.]

W-Well, that's useful! Better than just b-being stranded. Usually I work w-with a lot of phones, but I've never, uh, seen anything like this, exactly... m-most phones also don't, uhm, let you make video calls. But i-it sounds like a, uhm, well, it was a social media site, I used to s-spend a lot of time on it...

But, uh, y-you seem to know a lot about it! T-thank you.

[video forever]

[goodwoofjames]

[Ooh, this is new. He'd wonder if she was a relative of Bill's if it weren't for her obvious confusion.]

I think you shut it off, but this should be there when you turn it back on. Has anybody given you the pamphlet yet?

[sciencelizard]

[She does, finally, get it back on, albiet looking worried at his response.]

P-Pamphlet? P-people get k-kidnapped so often you h-have a pamphlet??

Video

[naughty_nurse]

[....well she's friends with skeletons, and there's bill the lizard, so, this isn't too weird. right? More importantly, a DOCTOR!!!!]

Um, excuse me, doctor! M-May I ask what kind of doctor you are...?

Video

[sciencelizard]

O-Oh, well, it's uhm... it's a d-doctorate, so, uh, like a degree... n-not the uh, h-healing doctor. I-I'm a scientist! Uhm, mostly in, mechanical engineering. But, uh, I-I've done a lot of other stuff!

But, uh, not. H-Healing stuff. I'm sorry.

voice;

[beatupgrass]

Welcome to Wonderland, sweetheart. You just figured out how to turn that thing off and then on again. Pretty handy skill. It'll probably save you some grief some day.

voice;

[sciencelizard]

U-Uh, well... p-probably! At least it, uhm, also turns it o-on again. Which is p-pretty useful, too!

Who, uhm, w-who is this?

video

[ngah]

[It's been a little while since the post went up, Undyne's fought children and... lost(???), and she's got a better idea of what the place is like by now. And so does Alphys, probably. But she'd like to talk to the scientist without a weird child hanging around, too, so she finds Alphys's post on the network like Frisk told her about.

Apparently Frisk talked to both of them separately, but Frisk also told Alphys about Chara, which means Alphys knows more than her about what's going on, probably.]

Hey.

[Should she just leave it at that? Probably not. She racks her brain for a follow-up.]

...If we're stuck here, at least... [Wait no that's too embarrassing. Noooo. Backtrack, backtrack. How do we salvage this.]

Uhh, you know, people die if they try to leave? That's pretty messed up, right? [Wow. Smooth. Undyne really knows how to talk to her girlfriend. With something Alphys probably already knows. God. THIS IS WHY SHE DOESN'T HAVE A PHONE. Or didn't.]

video

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys manages a crooked smile, though it's more genuine than she shows to anyone else. Undyne is trying, but even when she's not perfect, her presence is comforting, and in such a weird place it's more than welcome.]

T-They do??? That's pretty, uhm, messed up. Like, m-more messed up than anything else I've h-heard. But, uh... I-I mean, I wouldn't wish this on you, or anything, but, uh, I'm glad... I'm glad you're here. W-With me. But also just, uh, here, you know! N-Not that it's good to be, uhm, kidnapped. But, well, uh...

[She's exactly as smooth, honestly.]

Are you, uh, f-free? Or, uhm, not d-doing anything? I mean, uh, what I'm s-saying is, w-we could uh, s-see each other. N-Not that you have to! Or uh, anything.

Video

[singloversing]

[Oh geez, there's a lot happening here. There's-- is she a dinosaur? Can you just ask people if they're dinosaurs? That seems kind of...yeah, no. No, Wirt figures she's nervous enough.]

U-Um...I'm really sorry, but-- it's not a joke. And like, i-it would probably be a pretty bad joke anyway?

[Kidnapping is definitely not funny. Nope.]

But, uh. It's...sometimes people call them phones? [He's still kind of shaky on that, since it doesn't fit his late eighties ideas of what a phone is.] Y-You use them to like. Send messages to the other people here. So...you're already doing that?

[A pause, and then he sighs. He's pretty sure this isn't helpful.] Sorry, I-- y-you've probably heard all this by now.

Video

[sciencelizard]

N-No, it's fine! Uhm, a-anything helps, h-honestly. Just, uh, knowing other people are around is n-nice.

[She looks a little away from the camera, but obviously around the device.] It does, uh, look like it c-could be a phone. It does, uh, s-seem to call people! Though not, uh, quite in the w-way I'm used to. Phones don't, uh, usually s-show people's faces.

[video]

[assembles]

[ If it weren't for the fact that this scaly newcomer gave her name, Steve probably wouldn't have thought much of the announcement. It's similar to so many others made by those who are brand new to this place and still getting used to the technology.

But Sans had mentioned a Dr. Alphys as someone who might be able to understand the link between magic and science in this place. It turns out she's some sort of lizard person, to go along with the monstrous theme that defined Sans' underground. Steve knows better than to immediately bombard her with questions about her credentials, though. ]

Yeah, it broadcasts to everyone else here. [ Steve smiles at her, disarming. ] Has anyone explained...? You're pretty far from home.

[video]

[sciencelizard]

[Honestly, it's comforting he didn't. Having a big community is harrowing- I mean this is more people than she's spoken to in a long time, having spent a lot of her more recent time shut up in her lab. But Steve's face is gentle, and admittedly, Alphys has a weakness for kind men with nice arm muscles, so she's certainly not going to ignore him. Besides, she can't help but smile back when he smiles; she can tell he's trying to be friendly.]

W-Well, I've heard a lot of t-things. But, uh, n-not a ton about, h-how this place works, i-if you know anything about that. I-I mean, a-anything you know would, uhm, b-be helpful! I-I want to, uh, f-figure out as much as I can.

video

[krmvgivv]

So you're a scientist, but from somewhere without smartphones?

[Also she's a yellow lizard person. But that's.... just not that weird anymore.]

video

[sciencelizard]

[Hey, at least he's asking the real questions here.]

W-Well, a lot of the s-stuff I've used is, u-uh, outdated. [Whispered, slightly] I d-did get a bit of it from the, uh, trash I mean, I've seen p-phones with s-screens, but, n-never one that, uh, d-does video smoothly l-like this. Usually, it's, y-you know, a bad signal. I-I didn't expect it to be, uh, s-standard issue, I guess.

video;

[littlestreetcat]

There're people here, all right. Lots of 'em. But I'm guessing you're probably getting that idea by now.

[ Selina tilts her head slightly; she noticed there had been some responses to this already. She's a little late getting here. ]

Unfortunately, this is definitely no joke. And even if it was? It'd be a terrible one. You're in Wonderland, in case no one's already told you that. Basically? Some messed up dimension that likes to mess with the people it brings here.

[ Hm. She's making it sound bad though. Amazingly, Selina is one of the few who actually likes it here, despite everything, so she's quick to bring in some of the positives. ]

But, you get a rent-free place to live, unlimited food, whatever supplies you want, and magic is an actual thing here. So really, it's not a terrible thing.

video;

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys is getting the gist of it by now, but hearing someone actually describe positives is refreshing. She's not incredible at drawing on stuff like that on her own.]

W-Well, that's, uh, a g-good way to look at it! It'd, uhm, r-really be bad if we w-were somewhere t-trying to k-kill us.

Do you, u-uhm, k-know anything else a-about this place? It s-seems like everyone d-doesn't know w-what's going on very m-much.