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[Cissie takes her time to get her bearings before she makes her first video post to the network. She appears on screen, looking like any other ordinary blonde haired, blue eyed American teenager. It's an image she intends to maintain, just like she does at home. She holds a hand up in a small wave, offering a tiny smile.]

Hello, Wonderland. Can I call you Wonderland? That's what I hear this place is, and can I just say that I'm kind of seriously regretting never reading those books before? I mean, I'm not the best student in the world, but I do like to know what I'm getting myself into. Not that reading would ever prepare me for getting kidnapped into a children's book, but I don't remember anything about kidnapping anyway, so clearly this is a case of the movie not following the book. ...Where this is the movie, if that wasn't obvious.

[Oh my god stop rambling, Cissie. She looks a litle abashed, blushing faintly. Great, her shot at introducing herself and she's sounding like a complete dork. She clears her throat and continues. Here comes the awkward part.]

Anyway, my name is Cissie King-Jones. I'm from Pennsylvania. You... may have seen me on a Wheaties box? If you're from where I'm from, that is. And if you are, I'd really like to know. And if you're not... it's nice to meet you?

If anyone wants to be kind enough to give me the Cliff Notes version of things, that would be awesome. I guess these kind of 'hey I'm new, what's up with this place' kind of questions probably get old after a while, so if you just want to introduce yourself, that's fine, too.

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...Wheaties box?

Tim?! Oh, thank god you're here. How long have you been here? What is going on?

Cissie! [Not a superhero anymore, but still one of his best friends. Who... probably shouldn't be kidnapped here because of not being a superhero.

In any case, first matter to warn her about:]

Tim's gonna be weird about you knowing his name. There's time travel stuff going on. Unless you don't know his name either in which case disregard this message, I don't know any Tims.

Wait, seriously?? As if snatching us up and kidnapping us in the middle of midterms isn't bad enough, they don't even make sure we're all from the same point in the timeline? Who runs this place?!

[...Wait. Pause. Back things up, Cissie.]

...I mean. I'm really glad to see you both here, don't get me wrong. But. When is Tim from? When are you from?

[Paaaaaaaaause. It's a good thing he's experienced this with Kon, or he woul dbe freaking out a lot more visibly right now.]

I've been here a little over a month. As far as I can tell, this is what it appears to be, though I wasn't very convinced about that at first. I'm taking things at face value until evidence points otherwise.

When were you on a Wheaties box?

[Asking the important questions.]

[What's up it's a tiny nerd.]

Well, I have two pieces of good news for you. One, the book is in the library. So you can read it now, though it's only so helpful for navigating this place. I haven't changed size once. Not... because of Wonderland anyway.

[His home life is weird.]

The other good news is that we have a cliffnotes version. Here...

[Attachment: brochure.png]

...I'm Dipper Pines. If you have any other questions, I probably know the answer if anyone does. [A beat.] Why were you on a Wheaties box?

[...None of this is making Cissie very happy. At all. And she is less experienced at hiding her feelings than Tim is. HOW DO YOU NOT REMEMBER THE WHEATIES BOX, TIM.]

...I'm thinking the Summer Games in Sydney don't ring any bells for you, huh? Is this a case of amnesia, or timeline shenanigans? Although with our luck, it could be both.

Book's in the library, along with every other version of the story. They're not really helpful.

[She shrugs.]

All I knew before here was pretty much the Disney movie too, so don't feel bad. Maybe the Johnny Depp one might be useful, but I didn't see that one either.

[She'd meant to, but then life happened. Repeatedly.]

How'd you get on a Wheaties box anyway?

Um! Well! Y-You can leave, but it's at random? Like people coming in as at random? So you kind of just wait it out but sometimes that can take years. But you never really 100% die!

Hello there, and welcome. Though you can call me Newt, if you like.

I highly recommend the novels, and I found them in the library and can pass on my copy if you like. I took in both Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass. I admit, it doesn't make me all secure about this place, and I've already seen the Cheshire Cat here. Which was right before the flooding.

[Newt realized he wasn't entirely being helpful, tidbits of this and that with a hint of gloom thrown in.]

I'm rather new here myself, though I can try and offer a few things. People here seem to be very helpful, kind even so far in my experience, and they were there for one another when things went bad. Which leads to learning that apparently things go bad often, and it's in the hands of those that brought us here from what I can fathom.

[sigh]

I won't rule it out, but there aren't any obvious gaps in my memory to explain amnesia. And since Kon is a Teen Titan of all things, and the Sydney games haven't happened yet, I'm going with timeline issues.

[.....shiiiiiiiiiiit. This is worse than she thought.]

Um. Yeah, the Titans thing is... a thing. That happened. ...I'm sorry. How old are you? I'm not supposed to know your name yet, am I. Have I even seen your face yet?

No, and no. I'm fifteen. How old are you?

[Sorry, Ciss, this is actually not the first time he's been asked that question in Wonderland.]

...Seventeen.

[And Cissie... wants to throw up and cry at the same time. Your life is going to suck so much, and she is not prepared for this shit. Also she's missed you. This version of you. Even if you're pissed off right now. But she didn't realize how much until this very second.]

That's... pretty impressive. The handout. Also that you know so much about this place. Have you been here a long time?

[There's a beat, a pause, and then she remembers he asked a question.] Oh! I was in the Olympics and medaled in Archery. So I got a bunch of endorsements, and stuff.

[What, like it's a big deal?]

I'm starting to get that impression. I mean, that any version is going to be kind of different than this place. I did not know about a Johnny Depp movie though, and that is a shame.

[Cissie grins a little, because come on. Johnny Depp.]

As for the Wheaties, I won a gold medal in the Olympics, for archery. So, you know, if anyone needs an archer...

[AWKWARD LAUGH, how useful is archery anyway. When you're not wearing a mask and saving people.]

...That's a lot of kind of important information, actually. Thanks. You're saying people have been here for years? And you can't die? ...People have tested that??

Hi Newt. It's nice to meet you. [Even though she's going to take a moment to absorb everything you just said, because whoa. What is this place.]

People do seem very helpful so far, which is pretty great. It helps, I think--I mean, it would make adjusting to being here a lot harder. Not that I've been here long enough to really adjust, but. Uh... When you say things "go bad"... What do you mean? You said something about flooding?

[She's being helpful? Yaaay! She relaxes a bit.]

Well, technically you do die, but you come back to life later.

I'm not sure if anyone's running this place. Seems pretty random.

[He's still very confused. And he knows more than Tim about some things which is weird.]

Um, we just started up the Teen Titans. Tim's from way back. Man, he might not even know you stopped being Arrowette.

[She mentioned being on a Wheaties box and clearly she means as herself, not as Arrowette, so that's gotta be post-Olympics, right? And she knows who Tim is. Definitely post-Arrowette. Maybe post Teen Titans. They'll find out.]

You?

Oh, man. I read the books and I have no idea what's going on here have the time. I think you're okay.

[ More importantly: ] why are you on a wheaties box? Are you famous?

I wouldn't take the story as too much of a guide. Stories can be true, but they're very rarely the facts.

[He's sat down, elbows on the table his device is set on, chin on the back of his hands.]

As a relative newcomer myself, I can't tell you terribly much, although I can probably tell you where most things are inside this mansion. Outside- I haven't been out all that much, although I'm assured it's usually safe to a point.

[Pardon her, Cissie's just. Going to take a second to wrap her head around this.]

That's... I mean, okay, sometimes that happens where I'm from, but it's not the norm, it's generally just people like Superman... But that happens to everyone here?

[Nod-nod.]

Yes, everyone. So, you don't have to be too scared when it comes?

[... why is she saying that like it's inevitable]

Yeah, two years. Evelyn O'Connell wrote the handout. She's the librarian and the other person to ask if you have any hard questions. She's really smart.

[And cool and awesome and definitely has raised the dead by reading from a book but hey, who hasn't made that mistake before?]

The olympics? Seriously? That's awesome.

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