entranceway | [01] Video

[Cissie takes her time to get her bearings before she makes her first video post to the network. She appears on screen, looking like any other ordinary blonde haired, blue eyed American teenager. It's an image she intends to maintain, just like she does at home. She holds a hand up in a small wave, offering a tiny smile.]

Hello, Wonderland. Can I call you Wonderland? That's what I hear this place is, and can I just say that I'm kind of seriously regretting never reading those books before? I mean, I'm not the best student in the world, but I do like to know what I'm getting myself into. Not that reading would ever prepare me for getting kidnapped into a children's book, but I don't remember anything about kidnapping anyway, so clearly this is a case of the movie not following the book. ...Where this is the movie, if that wasn't obvious.

[Oh my god stop rambling, Cissie. She looks a litle abashed, blushing faintly. Great, her shot at introducing herself and she's sounding like a complete dork. She clears her throat and continues. Here comes the awkward part.]

Anyway, my name is Cissie King-Jones. I'm from Pennsylvania. You... may have seen me on a Wheaties box? If you're from where I'm from, that is. And if you are, I'd really like to know. And if you're not... it's nice to meet you?

If anyone wants to be kind enough to give me the Cliff Notes version of things, that would be awesome. I guess these kind of 'hey I'm new, what's up with this place' kind of questions probably get old after a while, so if you just want to introduce yourself, that's fine, too.

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[What's up it's a tiny nerd.]

Well, I have two pieces of good news for you. One, the book is in the library. So you can read it now, though it's only so helpful for navigating this place. I haven't changed size once. Not... because of Wonderland anyway.

[His home life is weird.]

The other good news is that we have a cliffnotes version. Here...

[Attachment: brochure.png]

...I'm Dipper Pines. If you have any other questions, I probably know the answer if anyone does. [A beat.] Why were you on a Wheaties box?

That's... pretty impressive. The handout. Also that you know so much about this place. Have you been here a long time?

[There's a beat, a pause, and then she remembers he asked a question.] Oh! I was in the Olympics and medaled in Archery. So I got a bunch of endorsements, and stuff.

[What, like it's a big deal?]

Yeah, two years. Evelyn O'Connell wrote the handout. She's the librarian and the other person to ask if you have any hard questions. She's really smart.

[And cool and awesome and definitely has raised the dead by reading from a book but hey, who hasn't made that mistake before?]

The olympics? Seriously? That's awesome.

[Dipper, your enthusiasm for the librarian is adorable. You're making Cissie smile.] Most librarians are smart. I think it's in the job description. That, or exposure to all of those books.

[Her smile widens a bit. This is one thing she's okay with being proud about.] Thanks. It was pretty stressful at the time, but after I won? Kind of really cool.

She's also a total badass. [Evie is who Dipper wants to be when he grows up.] So you're good at archery? I know there's a range somewhere here. I think there are more people who use guns but there are a few archers.

Really? [Cissie perks up immediately. You have just made her day, Dipper.] Do you think these magic closets could get me my bow and equipment? I was so not prepared to go an unknown amount of time without any practice. I was starting to hear my mother yelling through time and space at the very thought.

[She is grinning, but we all know SHE IS NOT JOKING.]

I'm looking forward to meeting your librarian, then. Who else should I make sure to meet?

Definitely. [A beat.] Well… sort of. If there's a specific special bow you use, you won't be able to get it without going through the vendors, and they'll take a memory from you. But you can definitely get a bow and everything else.

Aaand that depends on what you're looking for. I know most of the other kids and teens, if you want to meet them, and I can tell you who's been here forever if you want more information. It's hard to say who to be sure to meet cause there are so many different people.

...Hmm. Well, as long as it's a bow that works, I guess. I'll have to check it out.

I guess I'm not looking for anything in particular. It does sound like there are a lot of kids and teenagers, which seems... kind of weird? But anyway, you could start with your favorite people, and why they're awesome. Like your librarian.

That's... a very long list. [And not one Dipper totally feels comfortable giving. What if he doesn't say someone and they find out and they're offended? What if he does say someone and they figure out he definitely like likes them and doesn't just like them? What if someone disagrees? And then there's the question of will she agree with his definition of awesome? Wirt is definitely not awesome, but he's one of Dipper's best friends.]

We... have some superheroes? I guess they're awesome. And my sister and great uncles are here, but saying they're awesome might be biased.

[Dipper, she's not asking for a lot. You're overthinking this a lot. But luckily for you, you mentioned the magic word and have distracted her.]

You might be biased, but it doesn't make you wrong. Superheroes? Like who?

There's Spider-Man! He's a total nerd. And Faith, who's my friend and doesn't wear a costume or anything, but she's a vampire slayer, so she definitely counts. There was this event where a bunch of us had mutant powers so someone's a mutant, but I'm not sure who.

[Dipper frowns, thinking back, then nods his head.]

Oh, and some guy just showed up calling himself Superboy? But I'm not sure if he's a superhero or just really full of himself. Or both. You'd kind of... have to be to call yourself Superboy.

[Cissie's expression is a pretty even lineface.]

...I'm going to take a wild guess and say you don't have Superman where you're from, huh? Why would you call yourself Spiderman?

No. We have no superheroes. Except on TV and in comics, and our media is... different from everyone else's. There's Slightly-Better-Than-Average-Man and Flag Lady and Impractical-Arrow-Warrior and a bunch of others. And if you could crawl up walls and shoot webs like him, you'd call yourself Spider-Man too. ....or woman. Or whatever gender you identify as! Sorry, I shouldn't assume.

[01] Video

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