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[mettatonvevo]

[Today’s little network post opens with the camera pointed toward a festive little booth outside the mansion. Its purpose seems clear enough, but just in case you don’t get it, don’t fret! Because here is a handsome robot to turn the camera onto his face and explain it to you!]

Hello beauties and gentlebeauties! As you are all probably aware, today is Valentine’s day! For those who may not be in the know, it is a holiday devoted to love and the expression of love! Pink and red hearts, delicious chocolates, heartfelt confessions, secret passions; today is the day for it all!

[Here he adjusts the device so it is sitting on the booth and you can see his outfit clearly, as he props up his chin with his hands and flashes the camera a coquettish grin.]

Now, some of us have a special someone to spend this beautiful day with, and that is wonderful! For those of Wonderland who aren’t so lucky and feeling down about not getting that special Valentine’s Day kiss- never fear, for your favorite star is here! Come on down to the gardens and, if the price is right, you’ll get to experience these luscious lips for yourself~!

[He’s certainly put on a shiny red lipstick for the occasion…]

The price is, of course, anything Valetine’s day themed that you think I will like! There’s no currency here, so regular money just won’t do darlings! Impress me with something really extravagant, and your kiss may be extra special!

I look forward to seeing you here, sweethearts! Bye for now!

[He blows a kiss for the camera and it switches off.]

((ooc: Feel free to respond to this post on the network, run into Mettaton in the gardens, or do both! His default kiss is going to be a chaste kiss on the cheek or lips depending on how your character wants and the thread goes, but if you want ~something more~, feel free to pm me or hit me up on plurk and we can hash it out! Kids are 100% welcome; he’s gonna kiss the heck out of those cheeks and foreheads!! Let’s have a lovely Valentine’s day, Wonderland! ♥))

Comments

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[mcgucket]

That may be true, but I would know and I can't say if that would sit well with me.

[His marriage is already on thin ice as it is (more so than what he actually remembers right now......) and it's not like he could just... erase the memory of having done so.

... Oh wait, he could do that. Hmm. But even so--]

Surely there must be more prospective takers out there that you can try that with instead?

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[mettatonvevo]

Well if that's the case then, there's no need to be troubled! If you won't enjoy it, then no kisses will come your way.

[Mettaton has no intentions for kissing people who don't want it; there's no fun then if the other party isn't enjoying themselves!

He scoffs at Fiddleford's last comment.]

You'd think, but apparently all of Wonderland has the curiosity of an empty thimble.

[There should be people lining out the door to kiss him but APPARENTLY NOT.]

[mcgucket]

Oh, that's a shame... about the rest of Wonderland not being as curious, I mean.

[JUST TO CLARIFY, UM]

... Come to think of it, have you ever kissed anyone before?

[mettatonvevo]

[Mettaton quirks an eyebrow and smiles coyly.]

Of course, if you ever change your mind about that kiss, I'd be happy to assist~!

[At Fiddleford's second question Mettaton's smile grows just a tad wider.]

Oh yes I have. This mouth of mine was built with a complete capability to satisfy.

[Innuendo? WHAT innuendo????]

[mcgucket]

Huh... if I recall correctly, Dr. Alphys was the one who built you, right?

[alphys why did you have Mettaton's body include a feature like that???]

[mettatonvevo]

[Because this robot had a say in how he was built and he wanted to make sure he had total ~interactivity~]

Indeed she was! She had a stroke of pure brilliance to create me.

[mcgucket]

Can't say I don't agree with that: in comparison to what's already been invented back home and even some of my own creations, you're the most advanced of your kind that I've ever seen.

[mettatonvevo]

[Oh yes, please, fan his ego!!! He loves that shit.]

There's a reason that King Asgore gave her the Royal Scientist job. And me so much grant money for my first initial shows!

[He didn't rely on that forever, of course, but it was crucial in giving him his first foothold in creating an entertainment business in the Underground.]

[mcgucket]

Really? What were these shows like, if you don't mind my asking?

[mettatonvevo]

Oh, I held concerts and cooking shows and news casts and dramas and action shows- you name it, I did it! And they were spectacular! The entire Underground was in love with me and what I did.

[He made being rectangular hot, Fiddleford. It's wild.]

[mcgucket]

That sounds pretty amazin', bein' able to host so many different types of entertainment for people to see. I can see why they would have been impressed by your talents there.

[mettatonvevo]

[Goodness, just keep stroking his ego why don't'cha?]

Oh definitely! My fellow Monsters didn't know they had a Mettaton-shaped hole in their Mettaton-shaped hearts until I appeared~! They loved me when I was rectangular and they love me now. I'm just irresistible.

[mcgucket]

And modest, I see.

[... Fiddleford's being sarcastic, but honestly, he can agree that Mettaton certainly has the charisma to be considered popular and well-loved by fans, he thinks.]

[mettatonvevo]

Modesty is all well and good, but it's deceitful to say that I am anything less than the best. It's simple fact.

[Mettaton, this ego of yours could reach through the video and hit Fiddleford in the face with how big it is.]

[mcgucket]

Sounds like somethin' a friend of mine would say, honestly.

[A friend that both of us know, in fact.]

[mettatonvevo]

[Mettaton laughs.]

Do you mean Stanford? Yes I suppose he'd say something like that!

[mcgucket]

There's no supposin' about it, he would say somethin' like that if the thought occurred to him to do so.

[... He says this out of love Ford, really.]

[mettatonvevo]

[Mettaton lets out a loud laugh. Fiddleford sounds like Alphys whenever she talks about Mettaton to other people. It's endearing.]

It's surprising that it doesn't occur to him more often, then. It seems despite his ego however you're still good friends with him. He's lucky to have you.

[mcgucket]

[Before things started going downhill back home, Fiddleford would have instantly said "Of course he is" or something otherwise snarky to that effect. But instead...]

Really? You think so?

[mettatonvevo]

Absolutely! People like us need people like you to keep our heads on straight. We run the risk of floating away on our egos, but friends help hold us down and remind us of who we love.

[He says this with the smallest pangs in his soul. He misses Alphys so, so much. ...Maybe he should talk to her sometime soon. They do have a lot to speak about.]