entranceway | text; 'tis better to have loved and lost...

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text; 'tis better to have loved and lost...

[ It's late and, rather than lay awake in bed, Caitlin's curled up in a tearoom and messing with her device. The questions she pose aren't pressing, not really, just idle curiosity finally given words. ]

I think it's amazing how someone can develop feelings for someone else here, especially if you both come from different worlds. Wouldn't you be worried that Wonderland would suddenly decide to send you home the moment you found actually happiness? Or plagued by the fear that the person you've fallen for isn't who they actually are? Just who they present themselves to be here.

[ She knows something of that, herself. The danger of falling in love with the idea instead of the actual person. ]

If you found yourself in that situation, would you hold back, keep your feelings to yourself? Or would you jump without thinking twice?

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[ el is dealing with a personal problem re: someone going home right now, and makes a somewhat naive assumption that this is also what caitlin is talking about. she's like, thirteen ok. give her a break. ]

Dustin went home because he was happy?

[ It's still a valid assumption. Happiness is happiness, no matter the source.

El isn't alone in being sad about Dustin going home. ]

I don't know that that's the exact reason. It's just a theory. Just me trying to make sense of Wonderland, I guess.

ok. you think if being here makes us happy, we go home? what if we're happy because it's not home?

[ Oh. Oh. That hits her right in the heart. ]

Then maybe the rules are a bit different. For that situation, I mean.

[ el is here to murder ur heart tbh. ]

oh. i hope so. i don't want dustin to be unhappy, but i miss him.

Edited 2017-03-26 22:12 (UTC)

I miss him, too. He's a good friend.

you knew him?

I did. During an event where I was made into a much younger version of myself, we were close.

i knew him from home. when i came here, he helped me. he never made me feel bad.

[It's not often that Mettaton responds to a network post with something other than a video, but for once he doesn't want his face seen. This kind of question is a bit more pertinent to him than he'd like.]

Well, I'd say for the more romantically inclined it would be best to throw yourself into it, Wonderland's cruelty be damned. But in a practical sense it would be best to keep it to yourself because of how mercurial this world is.

That said... I'd like to think that confessing your feelings might be better than keeping it to yourself.

[That didn't go so great for him but at least it's out now.]

Both options hold appeal. And what's good for one person isn't necessarily good for the next.

I think, sometimes, emotions have a way of coming out, whether you want them to or not.

That is true. Sometimes you feel so passionately that despite your best efforts something still slips out.

But it should be better all around to not go into these things. That way only one person is hurt rather than two. It's less damage, I think.

( the one sucre is interested in comes from her own home, and is here in wonderland with her. so she's never had to think about it, apart from what it would mean when they both went home and sucre was still dead there— but she tries to avoid that thought, because it hurts as much as it did when she actually died.

but she considers the question seriously before she replies. )

Some people have been in Wonderland for a long time. Why not make the most of it while you're here? Falling in love could just be part of the experience. And it's a beautiful thing, to love someone. Why bother denying yourself that beauty? :-)

Edited 2017-03-24 00:38 (UTC)

I agree, love is a beautiful thing. But it isn't without its own ugliness and pain.

I'd jump in. My circumstances are different from most but I wouldn't hold myself back from present happiness because of a potential for future pain. You're always going to lose someone, there's just a question of how good the memories are before you do.

Is there a certain point where, metaphorically speaking, you stop touching the stove after getting burned again and again?

Arguably the same risks exist even in our original worlds. Perhaps there is a higher certainty of loss to face here, but that risk exists regardless. As for falling for who someone pretends to be rather than who they are--

Certainly that's nothing unique to Wonderland.

Not unique, sure. But here, there's less avenues to finding out who they really are.

Do you truly believe so? I'd think that such a ruse could only be maintained for so long regardless. Certainly we're put in a variety of stressful situations here; a person's true personality is bound to surface at some point.

More importantly--is there someone in particular that's causing you to have these concerns?

I do. I think people will continue to be surprising, in good and terrible ways.

And no, there isn't anyone here who's given me cause for concern.

Well certainly. But the surprise comes from the revelation of the truth, as said. Even if one were to attempt to fool those around them, we’re in close quarters and subjected to events with any number of effects. It takes effort to put on a front even in what one might deem normal circumstances, which hardly exist here.

I doubt anyone can hide themselves for long—but whether they can or not, the end result is the same, isn’t it? The realization, the shock—and the pain of betrayal from someone you truly believed in.

[Which is what one would assume Caitlyn truly dreads in this scenario.]

I've been rather fortunate in that the person I love also happens to be someone from my world, but I've been here a long while and I've seen others fall in love here. I think it's rather admirable! Courageous even, to fall in love when Wonderland could separate you at any moment.

[He's watched so may people come and go, and dealt with that sort of loss. He can't even imagine himself losing Lily, even knowing she would be at home. The thought is heartbreaking on many levels.]

I think jumping in's the best choice - why be consistently miserable because you can't be with someone when you could be happy with them, eve for a little while?

It's absolutely admirable. And brave. Love itself takes a certain amount of courage.

Being here just presents the terrible possibility of being reunited after that separation, except they don't remember you or remember what you had.

That's true...but, it can happen with friendships her as well. The only way to truly avoid that is to ever talk to anyone, and that's just a terrible way to live.

I guess the bigger question is, which one would you regret more, you know?

Unless you're the type of person who doesn't feel regret.

I don't know anyone like that, but they supposedly exist.

Oh yeah, I guess. But you know, I think they still feel it to an extent, even if they do exist, you know?

It's going to go wrong - that's a question of 'when', not 'if'. You can still kill time with it, everyone needs a hobby, but it will go wrong.

I don't know that I would consider this type of thing a 'hobby.' Or something to kill time with.

You'd genuinely be better off if you did. Not 'if' but 'when', remember? Though I can give you the 'better to have loved and lost' schtik too, if you'd rather.

Seriously though, don't get too attached.

idk sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith.
some people are worth the risk and you may never get the chance to again.

What if you've already used up your chances?

is this someone you've already been involved with?

yno what when i first got here i wouldve agreed with you. and this is weird to put into words so bear with me.

back home i aint ever had anything like that because of how much i move around. no guarantee ill ever go back a way i went once and it aint fair to drag someone around with me that dont want a part of that life.

then i met someone here and i held back at first until i couldnt anymore. i wouldnt trade what ive had with her for anything. if she was gone tomorrow it would still be worth it. sure i worry. i worry she might leave or i might leave her even for all that i dont want to.

but im a big fan of taking chances where you get them. you never know where theyre gonna lead and living a life not taking chances even if you might get hurt sounds like a life not lived to me. risk is part of living. sometimes you just gotta jump and hope the ground is soft when you land.

That's actually very well-said.

heh. thanks. people tell me i got a way with words.

Why talk to anybody and make friends at all then?

I mean, I'm just eleven years old. I don't expect to find my soulmate or whoever I wanna marry here or anything.

But keeping to yourself is dumb. You'll be so lonely if you try not to care about anybody because tomorrow you or them might be gone. It's just like normal life- people move away, accidents happen, people you love could suddenly disappear and if they matter that much to you, then you promise yourself that you'll try to find them again.

If Wonderland connects worlds, then maybe there's other places that connect worlds too. Whenever you go home someday, you could always try to find your way back to them?

Anyway. I'm just a kid. I'm bad at love advice.

Not bad, actually. Not at all. Age isn't a reason to discount someone's thoughts.

Well, I wouldn't know anything about crushes and boyfriends and stuff.

But when I like somebody a lot, I try to do something nice for them. That's just the nice thing to do, for a person you care about.

I haven't been here long enough for something like that to be an issue, but what's to keep someone from having those worries back where they come from? Other than just suddenly going home and being separated with no real way to contact each other (which I can speak to from a situation back in my universe) the idea that someone you're interested in is pretending to be someone they're not could be universal, couldn't it?

Oh, it's definitely universal. It just feels like there would be less opportunity to find the truth here. There's a good number of people who are the only ones here from their world.

I don't know, most people can't lie about themselves entirely to someone they care (or 'care') about for too long without slipping up in one way or another.

I don't think we have control over how we feel, especially with stuff like that.

But I told the person how I felt. They didn't feel the same way. But I'm still glad I said it. Holding it back felt like lying.

Lying to them or lying to yourself?

Both, I guess. But that person had been so kind to me, that I couldn't stand the thought of "lying" to them for so long.

Not just about romance, plenty of ways to make connections here that would hurt to lose.

Goes even further, you get people here who're not around any more where they come from, you could get this thing happening with people who are from the same world.

But they always say it's better to have loved and lost. So, go for it, I guess. You need something to keep you going, here and there.

I suppose my situation with Fitz doesn't fit your quandry perfectly, but I have thought about it. We talked about it. I suppose I live with the knowledge if one of us is left and the other is gone, that leaving while the other remains is not a choice we would have made willingly. I worry about it, sometimes.

I can't speak for others, but I know we'd spent so long finding reasons we couldn't, or shouldn't, and letting things be in the way.

[ This... This is something that's been weighing on her for a long time. Darcy has a tendency to care about people unconditionally, giving more of herself than she should. It always hurts to lose someone you'd grown to care about and trust, cutting a little more deeply when you know it could've been something more in another life. She sits on responding for a long time, keeping herself busy around the coffee shop and avoiding her device while she toyed with how much she wanted to share. Of course, secrets aren't exactly a strong point. When she finally composes a response, it's pretty well thought out - even in complete sentences, unlike most of her texts which are fired off almost as quickly as she can type them - mostly following her word vomit style stream of consciousness. ]

I kept my feelings to myself mostly. We skirted around the topic without ever actually talking about full on feelings, but I think we both knew they were there and just like the other time I think I felt it, we knew it couldn't ever be pursued.

Then, they were gone. Wonderland sent them back home and I'll never get the chance to be honest about how I felt. I'm apparently the opposite of everyone else here, though, considering how many weddings I've seen.

[Feelings are tricky when you don't have a life-threatening situation to chuck yourself and the other person into to earn a confession. ]

In other news, this place has a weird way out outing fakers eventually with all the events that go on and the fact that we all live so closely even though the mansion's huge.

Edited 2017-03-28 15:31 (UTC)

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