003 [video]

[sexandoutrage]

[Are you sick of his face yet, Wonderland? Well, you might as well get used to it, because you're far more likely to catch him here than in person. But at least this time there's more of a point to this than piglets or sassing the crowd. It's something he's been mulling over for a few days, and Sam's post about classes (and other things) has finally spurred him into action.]

Okay, so I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I've dug around and haven't found what I'm looking for, so I'm looking to you guys to kind of...Help me compile a few things.

[He leans back in his chair, lacing his fingers together over his middle.]

Now I'm sure by now, we've all heard the story of how the Jabberwocky is supposed to show up at some point in the relatively near future - because let's be honest with each other, folks, five years isn't that long, and I can't give you an ETA on when I can get us out of here, just that I can - and that doesn't leave us a whole lot of time. Now, I know I wasn't here when the message was delivered, but you guys have been pretty great at giving me an idea of what we can expect. And I know there's some dissent among the crowd here about whether that's still going to happen or not, but just. Let me run this by you.

Thanks to all of that, I've put together a few ideas, and I'm curious about who might be on board. Because ultimately, it's going to take every last one of us to make it work. So consider this me putting out my feelers for how you guys feel about it.

One, we should probably start weaning ourselves off the closets of this place. Stockpile what we can't make ourselves at first, use those greenhouses for more than just a landmark, maybe. I know there's stuff out there now, but it might be good to start looking into things that go beyond being pretty decorations. Start looking into food crops, medicinal plants, that kind of thing. I know cold turkey's not an option, but on the whole, whether this Jabberwocky really shows up or not, it might be better as a whole if we stop relying on "magic" - [He uses finger quotes.] To do everything. And we should probably think about giving this place a different power source. I don't know what's running the electricity and everything now, but I've got some better ideas for that.

Two, there's a list of classes - which is highly informative, actually, I didn't think you guys had anything like that - but no kind of guide for who can do what here. Basic things, because while we don't age, we can get sick, we can die, we need haircuts...You get the idea. So what I'm asking is, if you have a basic skill like that, no matter what it is, let me know. I'm gonna be putting it together, so it can be in that updated pamphlet you've heard Pepper talk about working on. I know people drift in and out of here, and that's fine, because editing isn't that big of a deal. That way people don't have to take a blind stab in the dark for what they're looking for, and have a list right there ready.

And...I guess that's it. Everything I had on my list for now, anyway. If you have anything you wanna add, let me know, because I fully admit I've still got the new car smell here, and this was just stuff that happened to occur to me talking to you guys.

[ADDENDUM TO THE ORIGINAL BROADCAST:]
By the way. My birthday's tomorrow. Feel free to direct all gifts you plan to shower me with to Miss Pepper Potts. She knows what to do with them.

[Because clearly Tony's birthday is the most important part of anything ever. Stark parties are legendary.]

Comments

[justrunsasaloon]

[This is why she likes you.]

You want the nitty gritty or the basics?

What I mean is, I ran a bar, but there's a whole lot involved in that. Wanna know details or just that I did that while raising my daughter?

[sexandoutrage]

Give me everything. No detail's too small for this, I'm thinking. Because it'll be a good way to see where we need to shore up what we don't have.

But now I have a name to stick to the face; you're Ellen, right? What kind of lore or whatever are you sharing.

Action

[heirtotheshield]

[ James is playing a frustrating game of checkers with Dummy. Somehow, the robot keeps winning. James is pretty sure he's cheating. ]

People don't die here? And what's a Jabberwocky?

Action

[sexandoutrage]

[Silly James, Dummy was programmed by the best.

But he glances over at the questions, because really, he hasn't seen the need to share that with the kid yet, but it might be better if he does, in the long run.]

We can die, yeah. But apparently we don't stay that way. They say the limit's five, before something awful happens, but...I haven't really felt the need to test that, you know?

[The rest he's still not completely clear on.]

It's supposed to be some unkillable dragon or something. Apparently it's show up, like, twice, I don't really know, but it's supposed to come back for round three fairly soon.

Video;

[impalementarts]

[Clint recently had an encounter relevant to this]

Do you mean to tell me there are classes here, and schools, and people with children who could be watching children?!

[He tones the volume down a hair, runs his hand across his forehead before letting lose about fifty different military swears] ...Why isn't there a billboard fifteen feet high that says School. Deposit children here!?

Video;

[sexandoutrage]

[And that right there earns a raised eyebrow.]

Apparently, but it's not just for kids, looks like. More like school for everybody. And I don't know, but here, I'll send you the file I got. Some of these kinda look...Special.

Attachment: wonderschool.txt

video;

[hypercompetent]

Like I was telling Rachel--I've got a couple notes from the Jabberwocky thing if you want them. A lot of it is straight up looney bin levels of crazy [ and oh would he know about it ] but my future self left me some stuff about what happened. It's kind of a timeline, I think. There's this thing called the Core I think you'll be pretty interested in, cause I think it powers the mansion.

[ that face and voice belongs to a teenager, who is totally 100% not sparkly eyed over the fact that tony stark is on the network right now. he keeps his fanboy glee in for the sake of business for now. ] Half of the problem was that they were starving, so I think you've got a good point. I'll put my gardening cap on. [ finger guns and a wink at the camera. ]

video;

[sexandoutrage]

[Oh God, it's another one. But hey, he can be kind of professional about this. Kind of.]

Yeah, that'd actually be pretty great, honestly. You're one of the ones that had a future version show up? [He's been curious about that since he first heard the story.]

I'd rather keep us from starving, if I can, anyway. Another thing we could probably do is start getting together non-perishables. No one wants beenie weenies out of a can, but beggers can't be choosers, and if it comes down to that, it'd be nice to have.

aaand video;

[climbed]

[ there's a little clumsy fumbling over on this end of the video, before it pops up and shows a kid, maybe twelve years old, eyebrows knitted together. what caught bran's attention wasn't the first part--really, he hasn't a clue how the "magic" works here, and is only just now getting comfortable with the mansion as a whole, let alone the idea that there's "electricity", as lady rachel had called it, but it's the second part that interests him.

he's pretty much stuck--though jojen had gotten him some form of a cart from the closets, he is still too weak to pull it, and there's not much to be done when you can't walk and neither of your forms of transportation can be utilized. although maester luwin's lessons were often boring, they gave the young lord something to occupy his time, way back in winterfell, and since he clearly is unable to chase the three eyed raven here, and only spends his time trying to feasibly have greendreams and wish that he could warg, he's left, well. quite bored. ]

Ser, did you say there are lessons taught here? [ it's not learning to shoot a bow, or ride a horse, or, anything bran would want to do but... it's just as important, as maester luwin has always told him. ]

video;

[sexandoutrage]

[Oh, look. A kid version of Medieval Village. Okay, yeah, sure, he can work with that.]

Name's Tony. And yeah, there's a whole list here. [He almost offers to send the file, but...Well. Given, he's 99% sure that will do zero amount of good. So, back up, retrace. Start over.]

I can print out a copy, so you can look over it, if you want. There's some pretty interesting stuff, from math to cooking, so something for everybody, I guess.

{ video ; private }

[thehobbsgirl]

[ Abigail hesitates before she sends her answer. Part of her thinks it is safest to stay as far under the radar as she can, and offer no information about herself. But it sounds important, and she decides that ultimately, not answering will probably seem more shady ]

My dad taught me how to hunt. So, you know... shooting, gutting, skinning, that kind of thing. [ He'd been talking about planting gardens, after all, but if they're going to be doing some sort of survivalist living-off-the-land thing, hers might actually be a useful skill-set. Abigail doesn't want that to be the only skill she lists, though, so she adds ] I can help with gardening, too.

{ video ; private }

[sexandoutrage]

[On the whole, he's not really looking to judge too terribly hard. It's at least apparent to him that there are so many different backgrounds in the mansion that it would be hard to assume anything beyond the surface details.]

I actually hadn't thought about that. Admittedly, I haven't spent any time in the forest yet, but I didn't know if there was any game out there or not. I was thinking, too, cows and chickens and whatever it is you keep on a farm might be good to look into, too.

But yeah, definitely maybe a garden. And probably a rough headcount of how many people are actually here, so we have a good idea at volume.

[video]

[handing]

Wow. I'm impressed.

[And she actually means it. Pepper's watched the video, hardly able to believe that it's Tony broadcasting it. The speech honestly sounds more like one she would prepare than him, based on the fact that it sounds prepared at all. But it's focused, to the point, and very unlikely to anger anyone. So she's also rather pleased, a grin on her face as she replies.]

Did you come up with that on your own?

[video]

[sexandoutrage]

I might have run it by JARVIS before I did it. [For two solid hours. While JARVIS stripped it of anything inflammatory. Until it sounded somewhat professional and not like the half-assed and half-formed explanations Tony usually gives.]

[seekingbrother]

I'm on board! And you already know what I can do. [Smug? Alphonse? He would never.] I'm also a pretty good fighter, and I'm willing to help teach others if we wind up forming a class for basic self-defense.

[sexandoutrage]

There's a couple of those already running, looks like. I can't vouch for quality, but something's better than nothing. You know a Shannon Beiste? It looks like she's running the main one.

[enchangement]

[ someone is sitting on the floor, legs crossed, device in her lap. ]

`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

When did a warning come, and how long is five years?

[sexandoutrage]

[And he's tried to parse that at least ten times, before he replies.]

What.

video;

[eatsyourscience]

[Souji listens to Tony's proposition and, with three years of perspective, decides to weigh in.]

I don't think ignoring the magic here is going to get us anywhere. We've survived well enough when the closets and everything did stop working.

Besides-- [He gestures vaguely with one hand.] The kind of thing you're suggesting would take a lot of time--more time than most people will even be here. There's no reason for us to turn it into a post-apocalyptic video game setting.

video;

[sexandoutrage]

Of course it'll take time. I mean, I could build bots until they're running everything in this place and it'll still take time. But has anybody considered maybe relying so heavily on this is what causes it? That maybe we're feeding it?

I'm not asking for post-apocalyptic here, just some measure of self-sufficiency. Right now we're using them for everything. Which is probably what whoever is running this joint wants. And really, what else are we gonna do while we sit here.

[video]

[thepointisdolphins]

[Crowley doesn't know this guy, but he raises some very good points. These are all things that Crowley has been thinking about, though he's been distracted lately with hunting murderers and dying and all that.]

...I can see my way to growing veg in the greenhouses. I haven't grown anything in large quantities in a time, but it shouldn't be too hard.

[He's managed to put the fear of Crowley into all of his closet-gotten houseplants, as well as some of the local flora, so.]

As to that second part...I'm not too sure that having a list of our names and abilities and weaknesses is a particularly good idea. Some of us have enemies here, you know.

[video]

[sexandoutrage]

I think if enough people are willing to pitch in, it won't be that bad. I can work up a system to make it easier, too. Build a few irrigation systems, maybe. Once I get out there, see what kind of space we're working with.

[But to the second, he just shakes his head.]

I don't care if you're allergic to kryptonite or whatever. You keep your weaknesses to yourself. [He will be.] I'm looking at practical skills. I realized there's a whole list of classes here, but not one for who to go ask if you need a haircut.

Video

[pottershotter]

[James lets out a low, sort of impressed whistle.]

Not too shabby, considering there's no way you've been here very long.

[If he had, James would have noticed by now. He's been fairly active in all the efforts to get out of Wonderland so far, and he's been around for three years. He would have seen this bloke along the way if he had been around.]

It's definitely good to stock up, but we need that sword back. I dunno how much anyone from the future said about it since I got swapped, but I was here the last time the Jabberwocky was around. I saw it for myself. Nothing else could even touch it.

[No spells, no weapons, nothing so much as scratched the Jabberwocky. But, James raises an eyebrow as he remembers something else.]

You don't sound like you've got a very high opinion of "magic" though. [And he uses the finger quotes too, mockingly.] Shame, that.

Video

[sexandoutrage]

[He's not been here very long, no, but Tony's not the kind to sit idle. This is a guy, after all, who swallowed entire files and theories on thermonuclear astrophysics in one night, when his specialty is engineering. That genius tag isn't just for show. He catches on quick.]

I keep hearing that, but no ideas on how to make it magically appear. Besides, what makes it so special. I mean, there's the idea that if it exists, it can be replicated, if anyone has an idea how it actually works. I'd willing to at least try, if the real one's gone for good.

[But to the second, he just sighs and gives a little eye roll.]

I've got nothing against magic, in and of itself. I know it's a thing. I also know it can probably be studied, like any science. What I do have a problem with is people using it as a crutch to do nothing.

[video]

[assembles]

[Steve will admit, he's impressed.

It's not that he doesn't consider Stark capable, because that's not true. It's more the fact that he's reaching out to entirety of Wonderland with a speech that doesn't have unneeded comments tossed in every other sentence.

Granted, it's sinking in for all of them that they're going to be trapped here for a while, and with the threat of the jabberwocky and everything that comes with it, they need to be on top of things. Good thing they're all on the same page there.]

Pretty sure you know my whole skill set by now. I'll pitch in where I can.

[And Steve isn't able to ignore that additional comment, either.]

So, what kind of gift does one get for a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist, anyway?

[video]

[sexandoutrage]

[To be fair, while the original impulse almost had exactly the kind of rambling, jargon-filled hot mess he usually delivers, JARVIS had commented with something snide, and then he and JARVIS had spent the next two hours fixing and refining it, all because Tony had snapped back, asking JARVIS well, what did he think Pepper'd do.

But for all that, it is what Tony had wanted to get out there, just in a more concise, less-Tony-ramble-bloated form. Because really, he hasn't been here long, but he's seen enough - especially with that last event - that just sitting back and waiting it out is not really an option anymore.]

Never doubted you for a minute, Cap.

[Not this. Everything else? He's still side-eyeing the hell out of him. He's got the EXO pack now, though, and he's not necessarily keen on letting it go; not without a few answers. But for now, that can wait.]

You know, that is a very good question. One I'm sure you'll contemplate completely before tomorrow.

[Video]

[evilhandissues]

[Lindsey looks well. In fact he looks awesome, oozing charisma and charm]

Attorney by trade and profession, some skill in the magical arts -

That's your problem you're not considering people who know how to use magic. Or at least your speech doesn't seem to.

[Video]

[sexandoutrage]

What are you gonna do, slap me with a lawsuit?

[It's a joke. Mostly.]

Yeah, that's not what I'm talking about. What I'm talking about is the people here - multiple ones, in fact - who simply throw up their hands and say magic because something's hard. I'm fine with magic, to a degree. I'd love to be able to see what makes it tick. But it's not a good reason to just roll over and take it.

video;

[kirachu]

[ waitwaitwait ]

Did you say you can get us out of here? Like, home?

video;

[sexandoutrage]

[All of that he just rambled about and that's what she took away from it?]

Yeah, I did. I also said it's gonna take time. Maybe more than we have.

[imperfect_science]

I’m assuming the Jabberwocky is one of the Wonderland natives I keep hearing about? [ Only hearing about, because he hasn’t been able to track one down for himself yet. He’d love to interview one of the less murderous ones, if they exist. ]

I’m not sure what I can contribute, since I just got here, but… I’ve been told that I’ve been here before. [ And he’s still unnerved by Wonderland’s selective memory wiping abilities, a fact that is unlikely to change despite Carlos’s ability to adapt to the weird and strange. ] Apparently, I started a journal on the scientific study of Wonderland the last time I was here. And if I know myself- which I like to think I do, at least partially- I think what keeps this place running would have been central to my studies. There might not be anything useful in those notes, but if I can manage to find them I’ll pass them along.

[sexandoutrage]

You don't know the poem about the Jabberwocky? No, rewind that. You don't know the Alice In Wonderland story? Check the library, the books are probably there.

[Reality is weird enough right now, and he'd rather keep storytime to a minimum, if he can help it.]

Long story short, the Jabberwocky is some dragon that's supposed to show up and trash our stuff. Understandably, some of us aren't too keen on that idea.

[But moving right along.]

What's with this place pulling in the eggheads-

Yeah, if you find 'em, I'd like to look over them. I've got my AI running to compile everything I've gotten so far in this place, and if I can augment it with other people's notes, that'd be great.

[video]

[selfrespecting]

[More and more people have been speaking of the oncoming threat of the jabberwocky, it seems, and Martha's relieved that the word's been getting out even to new arrivals.

This man here seems particularly driven, and that's a quality that Martha can always appreciate. She can only hope that a lot of people will volunteer their skills.

Which, of course, is her reason for replying.]

First of all, thank you for this. The more people working on our little monster problem, the better.

Secondly, I think we have less than five years, actually. Those who came from the future to tell us about the jabberwocky were from five years ahead of us, but they said the jabberwocky had showed up two or three years ago for them. Which means we probably only have one or two years before it's here. [Assuming that the timeline runs the same as it did in that time stream, but Martha's not going to get too technical with it right now.]

Thirdly! Dr. Martha Jones, nice to have your acquaintance, I run the clinic here. The last thing I want is to run out of medical supplies when the closets break down. I've been stockpiling, but if you come across any other methods for self-sustaining a medical clinic, let me know.

[That... was a lot of talking. She pauses for a breath.]

[video]

[sexandoutrage]

[Things Tony Stark does not want to hear: That the time he had thought he had to work with is possibly reduced to less than half. Really, really doesn't want to hear that. But okay, sure, he can...He can work with that, he hopes.]

Oh, good, I was worried we'd be working under pressure or something. No big deal. [Pressure like that might just turn Iron Man into Diamond Man: Not technically accurate, but the imagery is good.] At least you sound like you know what's going on, thank you. Has anything else already been set up? Or are we pretty much building a plan from the ground up.

[He figures it's definitely the latter, given the naysayers in the crowd.] What is you need. Back home we were dabbling our toes into the medical market, I might be able to work something up-

You're the one that was wanting something solar powered, right? Ellen mentioned you a while back, when I first got here. Sterilization equipment or something?

[tryit]

...Avengers assemble?

[Though, all smirking aside, Tony's got some good points here.] Seriously though, are you planning on pointing together a team?

[sexandoutrage]

Ugh, are we still using that? I thought we'd get rid of that, that's so...Saturday morning cartoon.

[But really, despite the joking, this is a lot more serious than he personally had thought.]

Less...Leadership gig, more trying to see what we've got to put something together. We're starting with a lot of naysayers and a lot less time than I thought.

[video] sorry for the late tag-in, been a crazy weekend!

[nascensibility]

[Someone mentioned compiling things on the network, and that happens to be Evelyn's speciality. Now that she's seen the poster, though...

Tony Stark she remembers. She went to a dance with him once in Wonderland - he's an amusing fellow, but since it's been so long between his last being here she assumes he's forgotten.

A pity, really, but it can't be helped. It happens.]

I've been collecting information on this place and keeping a- [(mostly accurate)] -census for about three years,

[Evelyn volunteers, interested in the prospect of throwing herself headlong into some new work.]

[video] it's ok bb, have some Tony from beyond the grave

[sexandoutrage]

Oh. [Well that's...Amazingly helpful. Or might be. It depends one what's in it, he supposes.]

Well, alright, then. What kind of census are we talking about here. What have you got.

[tom_hanniger]

My family business is mining. I can tell you anything you need to know about it if that is ever remotely helpful.

[sexandoutrage]

[Wait, didn't he have a conversation with you a while back about getting the hell out of here?]

I dunno, that actually might be a good idea. I can stockpile the specific alloys I need but let's be real here, we don't know what's going to come up.

video; the latest tag in ever.

[avoirfaim]

[ Hannibal considers not responding. He considers letting this potentially pointless endeavor run its course, but the potential isn't so sound. It would be better, in his case, to be upfront, rather than stay in the shadows. Human nature hardly ever suspects what is illuminated. ]

I'm a Doctor, Mr. Stark, and a psychiatrist. I also have experience in forensic psychiatry, as I have consulted with the FBI. I'm also an artist and a chef in my free time.

As for the closets, while your idea works in theory, I don't expect the majority, myself included, will ever choose sewing our own clothes and growing our own scraps of food over fine meat products and whatever it is we choose to wear normally. We've evolved far past that stage of human development. A Weening process only counts as weening if there's a total self-sufficiency end result. What you're suggesting is a diet.

Not that I'm against home-grown fruits and vegetables, mind you.

video; so rude

[sexandoutrage]

That is quite the resume. [And, in the scheme of things, it's a good thing they're not playing I'll show you mine if you show me yours. Because his is better.] Seriously, I'm sure with everything that goes on here with the dying, a shrink isn't a bad thing to have around.

[Hey, Tony literally has nothing against that at all. He has one back home. Sometimes.]

Yeah, I know. I'm used to five star hotels and houses all over the world. Crunchy hippie is definitely not my style, and I can build armor better than I can sew on a button. But my point in this whole thing is...What if the closets and the kitchen and whatever really do stop. I know there's some stuff out in the greenhouse now, but not enough to support...Well, however many people are here. Part of this mess in the future is that everyone is starving. I'd...Really rather not have to pull a Miracle of the Andes to keep fighting. I just think maybe not accepting everything given to us by the closets or whatever like it's a gift - because I know everyone might not see it that way, but it feels a little like a bribe to me - might not be such a bad idea, long term. We're going to have to keep using them for now, anyway, but taking a page out of some prepper's super secret notebook might be something we want to look at, as a whole.

Video

[itisourfight]

I have not heard this story, but I should very much like to.

[ Because if they have a big monster attack in their future that sort of seems like the kind of thing she should be aware of. ]

The skills I can offer are primarily those of a fighter and hunter, though I have some knowledge of the healing arts as well.

Video

[sexandoutrage]

Just that in a couple of years, some unkillable monster is supposed to roll up on all of us and a bunch of us are going to die. On top of that, the closets are going to stop with the freebies, and the kitchen will be closed permanently. In short, a lot of us are going to die and go off the rails because we'll cross that fifth death marker. And some of us will die for good.

Healing...Yeah, okay, we can work with that. I've talked to- [There's a pause there, as he actually stops talking long enough to get a good look at her. Mostly those ears. Which he gestures to his own.] This is going to be the dumbest question ever, but please tell me you're an elf.

video; ALSO LATE LOL

[digophelia]

[ There should be something hilarious about a whole damn army coming to get the Jabberwocky again, but it's not. It's been a year, she's slain the thing in her Wonderland. That doesn't make it any less stranger and a bit upsetting. She keeps herself composed, almost coyly smiling. ]

Why, an army to slay the Jabberwocky? I do hope the lot of you do better than the gryphon.

video; jfc you guys. B(

[sexandoutrage]

[Oh. It's you again. Sigh.]

No. To be honest, I'd rather the majority stay out of that fight. Best case scenario, all of us won't make it. But what I do want is to at least we don't starve while it's happening.