entranceway | Δ [1st Cipher] SVOOL WZIPMVHH NB LOW UIRVMW

[Static crackles and pops over the feed.

It is a combination of a radio tuner whining listlessly between stations with decent service, the familiar whirring grumble of the dial-up tone ad infinitum, the hoarse screech of a car trying to start on a lonely highway in the middle of the night, where it has broken down for seemingly no reason at all.

Images flicker: an illustration of Lincoln's assassination, a room draped with red curtains, the Teletubbies, President Nixon, video footage of a piglet slowly decaying into loam. And then- A V O I C E.]

I GӨƬƬΛ ƧΛY. ƬΉΣƧΣ DIGƧ ΛЯΣП'Ƭ ΉΛᄂF-BΛD. I MΣΛП, IƬ'Ƨ ПӨ IПƬΣЯGΛᄂΛᄃƬIᄃ ƬIMΣ PΛLΛᄃΣ ΛПD IƬ'Ƨ ПӨƬ ƬЯЦMP ƬӨЩΣЯ, BЦƬ I GΣƬ ƬΉΣ ΛPPΣΛL.

[On occasion, between the odd frequencies scrambling the frame with black and white noise, a single eye will appear.]

VΛMPIЯΣƧ. ΛПGΣᄂƧ. ᄃΛППIBΛᄂƧ. GӨDƧ. ΛΉΛΉΛΉΛΉΛ ӨΉ BӨY, IƧ ƬΉIƧ GӨППΛ BΣ FЦП. I'ᄂᄂ BΣ ЩΛƬᄃΉIПG YӨЦ, ЩӨПDΣЯᄂΛПD.

I ' ᄂᄂ B Σ Щ Λ Ƭ ᄃ Ή I П G Y Ө Ц.

[The transmission cuts, leaving a fuzzy screen and a garbled message:]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yeah, you were speaking gibberish. [now he's just being contrary]

What's the point of all this, anyway?

ЩΉΛƬ'Ƨ ƬΉΣ PӨIПƬ ӨF ΛПYƬΉIПG?

ƬΉΛƬ'Ƨ ᄂIKΣ ΛƧKIПG ЩΉΛƬ ƬΉΣ PӨIПƬ ӨF "GЯΣΣП" IƧ, ӨЯ ЩΉΛƬ'Ƨ ƬΉΣ ƧQЦΛЯΣ ЯӨӨƬ ӨF Λ ᄃΛЯЯӨƬ?

It's . . . really not.

I just want to know why you assaulted my eyes with that shit. But I guess you're just a troll.

ƬЯӨᄂᄂƧ ᄂIVΣ ЦПDΣЯ BЯIDGΣƧ ΛПD ΉΛVΣ ƬΉӨƧΣ ᄂIƬƬᄂΣ ƧPΛЯKᄂY GΣMƧ ƧƬЦᄃK IП ƬΉΣIЯ BΣᄂᄂY-BЦƬƬӨПƧ

IƬ'Ƨ ΛП IПƬΣЯΣƧƬIПG DIƧPᄂΛY ӨF ЩΣΛᄂƬΉ BЦƬ IMPЯΛᄃƬIᄃΛᄂ FӨЯ ᄂЦЯIПG PΣӨPᄂΣ ƬӨ ƬΉΣIЯ DΣΛƬΉƧ

I ᄂIVΣ IП ƬΉΣ IПFIПIƬЦM ӨF ƧPΛᄃΣƬIMΣ

DӨП'Ƭ YӨЦ KПӨЩ ΛПYƬΉIПG

Right of course, I should've paid more attention to troll biology in class.

If you live in the infinitum of spacetime, then why're you stuck here?

[he says it mockingly because ANTAGONIZING CREEPY VOICE IS A GOOD IDEA]

[Shut up shut up he is not stuck-]

ΉΛΉΛΉΛΉ. I'M JЦƧƬ ƬΉΣ DΣᄂIVΣЯY GЦY, PЯӨPPIПG ΉIƧ FΣΣƬ ЦP ΛFƬΣЯ ΛПӨƬΉΣЯ DΛY ΛƬ ЩӨЯK. ΉӨЩ DӨ YӨЦ ƬΉIПK ƬΉΣ ЯΣƧƬ ӨF YӨЦ ΣVΣП GӨƬ ΉΣЯΣ?

What, you're claiming you did this? Right.

[a pause as if to accentuate how very much he believes you. which is not at all]

Then tell me, Chuckles, what was I doing before I ended up here?

[This is the part that Bill doesn't like.

There's a firewall here, buzzing with too much noise (...Noise?), letting out flickers of recent memories in the cracks. He can't delve deeper than the most genuine truth (that Neku is dead), and whatever recollections float on top of the wall. Whatever he immediately projects.

It might be simpler, Bill thinks, to investigate when the kid is asleep and unable to hold up the barrier, but he's on call to impress and is luckily able to scrape enough mind-phlegm off the top to find something satisfactory.]

ƬЯYIПG ƬӨ ЯΣMΣMBΣЯ ΛПYƬΉIПG ΛBӨЦƬ YӨЦЯ ᄂIFΣ BΣƧIDΣƧ YӨЦЯ ПΛMΣ, PЯӨBΛBᄂY. ᄂӨӨKIПG FӨЯ BᄂӨПDIΣ.

[Vagueries, all of them are fucking vagueries.]

PЯΣƬƬY DΣƧӨᄂΛƬΣ IП ƬΉΛƬ BЯΛIП ӨF YӨЦЯƧ, YӨЦ ƧΉӨЦᄂD ƬΉIПK ΛBӨЦƬ ЯΣDΣᄃӨЯΛƬIПG.

Wait-- What? You can scan me?

[that rattles him, and he thinks rather loudly:] (I thought I was off-limits! The Player Pin--) [he starts to glance around, but then he realizes what's right in front of his friggin face]

No, hold up. I lost my memories weeks ago. And I posted about Beat. [you can just hear Neku calm down marginally] You can't scan me. Not enough, anyway.

[he's still obviously freaked; you don't have to be a (semi ;>) omniscient being of pure energy to tell that. but Neku has an advantage. and ohhhh, that's so rare, the slight tilt in his voice at the end there tells he's going to enjoy using that]

[The Player Pin.

That's what that piece of shit is. One of Bill's many eyes (in many places) hones in on the object in question, no doubt the most sinister-looking of the accoutrement stuck on Neku's hideous shirt. The thought gives him flickers of its capabilities and they aren't promising ones: a line of defense, but something that can similarly reach out. Feeling around the sharp edges of Neku's passing fancy Bill allows a shrug into his voice.

Even if he is internally screaming.]

ΉΣY, I'VΣ BΣΣП ЯЦППIПG ΣЯЯΛПDƧ FӨЯ ΉΣЯ MΛJΣƧƬY, I ᄃΛП'Ƭ BΣ ΣXPΣᄃƬΣD ƬӨ ƧΣΣ ΣVΣЯY ЩΉIПY PӨƧƬ YӨЦ KIDƧ MΛKΣ.

[TLW UFXPRMT WZNM RG GSRH ORGGOV KRHH-ZMG DRGS SRH NLGSVIUFXPRMT HKVXRZO KRM RH TLMMZ YV GSV XLMHRHGVMXB LU TZINLMYLARZ YB GSV GRNV YROO RH WLMV DRGS SRN]

I'ᄂᄂ ƧΣΣ IF I ᄃΛП'Ƭ PЦƬ IП Λ GӨӨD ЩӨЯD FӨЯ YΛ.

[ABORT ABORT ABORT]

[TLLW UFXRMT OFXP YROO, MVPF SZH Z WVRGB-ORPV YVRMT LM SRH HRWV GLL. NZBYV YROO ZMW QLHS XZM SZEV ZM ZHHSLOV GVZ KZIGB ZMW QLHS XZM NZPV YROO'H NVZG KFKKVG VZG MVPF KFPK]

That'd be nice of you. Thanks, Private Eye. Tell the Queen you totally work for I'd love to have a chat. Oh, and that she should probably fine-tune your abilities a bit.

[Neku's tone is nothing but the casual sass between friends, even as he is internally laughing]

[He'll get his grubby little dimension-hopping hands on that extra pin you've got sitting in your pocket, though, kid.

QFHG BLF UFXPRMT DZRG.]

ᄃΉΛПGΣ YӨЦЯ ƧΉIЯƬ BΣFӨЯΣΉΛПD, PЦЯPᄂΣ ЩΣПƬ ӨЦƬ ӨF ƧƬYᄂΣ ЩIƬΉ ΣMPΣЯӨЯ ПΣЯӨ.

[/ollies out]