entranceway | [video] once there was a way to get back homeward

Entry tags:

[video] once there was a way to get back homeward

[It wasn't enough, she thinks, to lose so much back home that she had to return here to another loss she was only just rebuilding. It wasn't enough to take away, it wasn't enough to really hurt, no, to quietly return to a familiar room, empty with its vast walls and dark corners. Slowly she filled it again, odds and ends of furniture and the trappings of a home to which she can never return.

She has a reputation to uphold even in spite of the circumstances, better to nurse the greatest wound out of the public eye, a garish scar across her stomach. Evelyn could swear the blade reached her heart.

The exhaustion nestles deep into her bones, a palpable chill that reminds her what she is.

What she isn't.]

I've been informed I was away for a little while, [she addresses the network, unable to muster more than a tired smile.] Perhaps someone might catch me up. I'll be-

[For a moment Evelyn appears distracted, hand gravitating toward her waist.]

I'll be in the library. I've also got several, erm, dogs that need homes. Please let me know if you're interested.

Private to Philip, 11:31 AM
I’m back. May I come and see you? It's important.
-E

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I really don't mind. You've got enough going on.

[ Er, that should have been "I'm sure you've got enough going on." Distinctions.

And, no, they probably aren't. ]

Oh, you know. [ ... ] The same. ... Uh, though, you missed zombies.

[Evelyn looks around herself for a moment, as if trying to determine what Sam is talking about in saying she has enough going on. Very little, it appears, save some organisation she'd gotten behind on while away, but that's no one's fault.]

So I heard,

[she supplies quickly, wholly unwilling to talk about the undead after everything that's happened. She owes it to Sam to be honest, as hard as it is to share.]

...are you busy, right now? I'd- I'd like to speak with you more privately.

I - No, I can meet. [ He hadn't expected that and is taken by surprise, and he nods, though she can't see. ] Now? Where?

[ It should be wherever she's most comfortable, after all; she's the one who's just got back from... who-knows-what. ]

I-

[She isn't certain, actually, which is part of the problem. Somewhere private.]

...I can come up to your room, if you're there?

Yeah, I am. [ Though it's a mess, as always. ] I'll leave the door open. Just... whenever you're ready.

I'll...be up soon.

[With the number of people ringing in and dropping by the library - subsequently feeding her anxiety, reminding her that she isn't like them anymore, reminding her that she shouldn't be here - Evelyn decides that sooner rather than later would suit her nicely, whether she's ready or not.

Neatly-dressed, reasonably composed, she knocks on Sam's door not long after cutting the feed.]

[ And Sam is ready, opens the door to the small room with a thin-pressed smile. ]

Hey. [ He moves aside, but only to make room for the eternal puppies that want to greet their guest. Minnie, who is especially fond of Evelyn, circles her with her whole body wagging in silent appreciation. Leo, who is especially fond of everyone, pants wildly and bounds around the room.

Sam closes the door once she's in, sticking his hands in his pockets. ]

Busy day?

[The dogs serve their role well, boundless affection when she needs it the most, and Evelyn steps into Sam's room to give them their allotted pettings. As soon as Minnie backs down enough for her to move further she turns to face the owner of the room, lacing her fingers in front of her.]

...long, thus far.

[She clears her throat.]

Just long. Do you...mind if we sit?

'Course not. [ And he hurries to clear some of the crap off of the floor, kicking away books and papers. There's one chair that he yanks a pile of clothes off of for her to sit down on while he settles on the edge of the bed, folding his hands over his knees as he leans toward her.

He tries to decide what the least offensive question might be, and starts with: ]

... Is Will gone? Or just missing?

[If that's the least offensive question, Evelyn would love to be privy to the most offensive one. She visibly bristles before taking a deep breath and clipping the spines from herself, one by one, relaxing in place. There is a certain finality in her tone when she says:]

Gone.

[Gone for good, if his barren rooms and frantic dogs meant anything. No trace left behind, the only physical reminders of Will's presence in the mansion being the animals she can't take care of all on her own. That, and the photographs of him, albums securely locked away in her room safe. Still in the process of sorting out how she feels about the loss, reconstruction in sight and cruelly dragged away from her, Evelyn clears her throat.]

Hence my attempts to find homes for the animals. [A beat, then much more quietly.] It feels as though every time I turn around, someone else has left.

[And did anyone notice her absence at all?]

[ Sorry, Evelyn; for all his intelligence, Sam is still a Winchester and is subject to the same weaknesses as the other thick-skulled men in the family. ]

... I'm sorry. [ They're friends and he knows that she and Will were more, a lot more, and that he had helped her through a lot in a way that only he could. He sets his jaw, brows knit as he casts his gaze downward. ] I knew him; I'm not sure if you knew that. Before everything with Hannibal - I guess we bonded over the dogs.

[ He laughs weakly. ]

But - I mean, you know how quickly people come and go. It can happen anytime. I'm sure he'll thank you for watching after those guys.

[ Someone noticed. At least one person remembered. ]

[Sam doesn't know and she cannot blame him for words that are intended to be kind sentiments, that should inspire some modicum of relief in her as she lifts one shoulder in a half-shrug. Listless. Noncommittal. She wasn't aware that Sam and Will had known each other, another connexion cut too short too quickly, Evelyn thinks, when both of them could use all the friends they can get.

She can't dwell on Will. She can't build little sand castles and play at indulging her feelings anymore when the high tide is inevitable, a hopeful I'm sure he'll thank you assumes guaranteed return when prior experience says otherwise.]

I died,

[she blurts suddenly, her anxiety reaching its peak and forcing itself out, water behind a splitting dam.]

I...I died, Sam.

[ His stomach turns. Slowly, like someone carefully flipping a pancake and failing, with the batter everywhere and a complete mess. He shouldn't feel this way, because she's died before, in the mansion. They all have, really. And he's died a dozen times back home, a more serious occurrence, but... most people, normal people, don't come back after they're killed.

They're lucky, he usually thinks, but not now. ]

How? [ He asks, weakly. ] ... You don't have to tell me, but - Jesus, Evie -

[ He reaches over to put his arm around her shoulders, squeezing. ]

[Evelyn has died thrice in Wonderland and still finds it difficult to process, to know that...to know that it's real, this time. That if she leaves she most certainly will not be coming back. The means isn't all that important and it's hard to say when it feels as though it quite literally happened yesterday, but Sam is asking-]

I was- stabbed. I bled out.

["It was messy" is implied, but she doesn't shake his hand away.]

[ ..... ]

The first time I died, I was a kid. Twenty... three, twenty-four. I don't know. I was stabbed in the back; cut through my spinal cord.

[ He couldn't give a damn about his own deaths and resurrection, but he's making a point. Sam's expression is a mask as he stares hard at the wall opposite, but the hand is still there. ]

Dean and I aren't special cases. I've heard more than once about people getting brought back, and not just in Wonderland. You've got people who care about you; I don't think they'll stop until you come back.

[ For better or worse. He furrows his brows deeply, then finally releases her shoulder. ]

I know there's probably nothing that'd make you feel better. I just... don't want you to feel alone on this.

[He died in his world, and he had been so young. Certainly, Evelyn very nearly died herself when she was twenty-one, chained to an altar and bearing witness to a great priest of Osiris' ritual. Only a man of the afterlife could bring another back with her spirit, but up until very recently things had not been so dangerous - archaeology is by and large a tame sort of endeavour.

This is news to Evelyn: that Dean and Sam have both died in their world, that they came back. It brings to light how long they have being working this way and who, if anyone, had pulled them away from the veil? What sacrifice was made? And how well does she really know them?]

My world isn't like yours, Sam,

[she intones quietly, a reminder that they aren't the same. Wishful thinking is an expectation of results when chances are slim to non-existent.]

I'm afr- I'm scared this place is all I have left.

[ He isn't even close to admitting the truth, that he's died one, two, three, four times, at least, has been to Hell on more than one occasion. Had lost his soul and worse-

Because it isn't about him at all, and his mind's already back on her expression, his own face a mask. ]

You don't know that. [ He says quietly. ] Most people don't come back, but not because they can't it. It- I know how this sounds, but it's not right. People aren't meant to be brought back.

[ And certainly not as many times as the apparently-dammed Winchesters. ]

More often than not, your world'll surprise you.

[Evelyn knows it is possible in her world to resurrect a person, to pull their ba and ka from the Duat and settle it back in the body from whence they came - or in another, as the case may be. It is possible because she did it entirely on accident nine years ago when the Creature clawed his way through several plagues and several Americans before attempting to slaughter her on an altar to be used as a physical vessel for his beloved.

What was Imhotep like before then, before Evelyn was coloured with the bias of an Egyptian princess and her own experiences? One wishes to give a priest of Osiris the benefit of the doubt and the reanimated mummy had no redeeming qualities, a monster with a lust for power and his own goals. In the Old Kingdom he could not have been much more than a man; perhaps the return itself altered him, perhaps it warped his sensibilities and if that is indeed the case-]

What is dead should remain dead.

[Quiet and decisive, arms folded over her chest Evelyn makes eye contact with Sam. She wants to live, truly, but at what cost? What would she lose, coming back?]

I have never known resurrection to bear blessings.

Not usually. For you, or the people who brought you back.

[ Or, "person," as it's often been. Sam shifts, sighs, pushes memories of his fruitless quest to save Dean from his mind, of the experience he'd never forget, where his brother was mauled to death and his soul taken to Hell. ]

You're smarter that most people. [ He says, weakly, but that much was obvious before. ] I mean, people think being alive is the best place you can be. So they bring back the dead, and... yeah, it doesn't end well. Been more than one hunts that started because of that.

[ And a lot of grief for everyone involved. ]

[Sam speaks from experience and she wants to ask, desperately, biting her tongue to keep from losing her temper. It isn't fair to be left in the dark, not after everything that has happened, but subjects of a clearly personal nature should be respected.

Not cracked open like a Christmas walnut.]

That's what happened to me, [she volunteers quietly, rubbing at the bridge of her nose.] I brought something back, once.

I've regretted it every day since.

You mean something - a monster. Something pretty damn dead. Right?

[ He can tell, and it isn't unusual. People revive old gods or summon demons all the time. It isn't the same as trying to return friends and loved ones, but it's... got a lot of the same consequences. ]

You can't change what happened. [ He says lightly. ] And, trust me, I know hearing that doesn't help, but it's true. Whatever you did, the way to make up for it now is to try and figure out what you can do to put the "something" back down to keep other people safe. Right?

[ Right. ]

Don't let yourself regret it. If you don't give this thing all your focus, it'll be pretty hard to get it sorted out.

It's...a little more complicated than that.

[I already put it down, she wants to scream, Someone just brought it back again.

The Creature, now a being of immense power and unprecedented rage, no longer has her son - a small mercy, knowing that Imhotep is still three steps ahead of them all, too close to bringing back the Scorpion King that he might use an army of the undead. It is too much, and she has no hope of stopping it with the way that things are.]

...but thank you for the sentiment.

Okay.

[ And he won't press, because of the way she isn't looking at him, because of the way she doesn't expand. He just nods faintly, rubbing absent-mindedly at Leo as he settles on Sam's feet. ]

It's fine. I just wish there was more I can do. You know how it is here, with... the memory loss once you leave, and all.

[ Makes it hard to give people hope when they can't carry it back with them. ]

Just know that however bad things seem? They've been worse before. Trust me. And the world didn't end, so... why should it mean that this time's different?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[video] once there was a way to get back homeward

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice; -> action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject