entranceway | e x p e r i m e n t #05 (accidental video)

e x p e r i m e n t #05 (accidental video)

[When the broadcast starts, it goes from silence to the immediate noise of two people screaming, punctuated by the sound of laser gunshots and mechanical whirring. It seems the device is on a side-table, giving a flat view of Ford and Alphys… perched on another table. Alphys is curled up, hands over her head, looking incredibly distressed, while Ford seems to be shooting at something off-camera.]

Oh m-my god, oh my god, we’re going to d-die here, I’m so s-sorry, I didn’t know they were all going to start...

Don’t worry! I happen to have excellent aim.

[All of a sudden, something takes a flying leap up onto the table, and Alphys yells as Ford shoots it down. The ensuing shot causes the device to fall over, revealing the floor is absolutely covered in knife wielding box tentacles, some with multiple arms, some with multiple knives, all running over each other and stabbing the floor, themselves, and the table. Alphys is still yelling. Ford is still shooting. It looks like an absolute catastrophe.]

Maybe we shouldn’t have prototyped them with the basic ability to learn--

Well it w-would have been fine if it was just, y-you know, one of them! They weren’t all supposed to turn on at the same time!

[Suddenly, Alphys turns her head and seems to notice the device, turning herself around and reaching out to grab it, bringing it in close to her and Ford.]

Uh, t-this is totally under control! No need to panic! I d-don’t, uhm, know how long this has been broadcasting, but, it’s f-fine! … And m-maybe don’t come to Ford’s room for, uhm, a little bit, for uh. Reasons.

Is that thing on? Uh, I mean-- Yes! Everything is absolutely, 100% under control. There is no need to worry about anythi-- [Ford cuts himself off and hisses.] Watch out, Alphys! I think it just tasted my blood!!

Oh g-god please don’t let that do anything new.

[And the device blinks off, cutting out the mechanical whirring sounds with it.]

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[Peter's been just hanging out on a ceiling in the Spider-man suit, looking out for trouble and scanning the device when suddenly-- Well, that's not exactly the trouble he was expecting. Knife wielding tentacle boxes running amok. It'd be totally cool if not for the danger of stabbings. Is that Alphys from the Hogwarts event? Huh.] Gonna join the broken record and ask: Do you need help? Cause obviously, you were waiting to accept help until a guy in red and blue spandex offered.

Seriously though, I have webs for trapping or slowing down all your tentacled, knife-wielding problems.

It's, uhm, l-likely handled? Sort of. The more we deactivate, the better it--

[WAIT A FUCKING SECOND. She stops mid-sentence and suddenly looks dumbstruck.]

A-Are you Spider-Man??? When did you get here?

[Peter has now become more accustomed to people looking at him and knowing who he is from comics, movies, even their own universes. It's pretty neat and also, it makes him a little embarrassed, because he's pretty sure all other Spider-mans have done way more saving than he has.]

That's what they call me. Hi. [He waves.] I haven't been doing a great job at being in touch with my Spider-side lately, but [He places a hand over his heart.] I promise to be a better Spider-man from here on out, starting with the robots or starting with cheering you on while you take out the robots.

[THIS IS SO COOL. First she's friends with Captain America, and Bucky, and now Spider-Man??? Wonderland sometimes does not suck. This is one of those times.]

I think, uhm, w-we have the robots handled, but wow, that's s-so cool! I mean, t-that you exist and also you'd offer help and ohhh m-my gosh you're Spider-Man.

[She's starstruck please forgive her]

[Peter smiles a little, unused to the attention, but he knows it's part of it. When he was first being Spider-man in the city, people had lots to say about him (some good, some bad). He never really saw himself as a hero. Just someone trying to do good, someone who was ultimately being a vigilante until he realized the lizard man was his responsibility (and not just cause he created it).] Hey, I put my suit on one web at a time like everybody else.

[Peter leans back against the ceiling]

You're the one that made the super cool, potentially very dangerous knife wielding tentacle robots.

Well, it's, uh, u-usually not the good guys making anything that wields knives. Sorry, uhm, a-about that. They shouldn't be a danger to, uh, anybody else! Or us, really, as l-long as we deal with it fast enough, and everything. I promise we won't, uh, ever build a-anything to intentionally hinder you or trap you or stuff like that.

[GOSH SPIDER-MAN IS HERE IT'S LIKE SHE'S LIVING IN HUMAN NEW YORK CITY AND THERE'S DANGER AND EVERYTHING!!!!! AHHHHHHH]

Isn't it like a scientist thing to make potentially dangerous creations. Try not to because then it can explode and be bad for everyone and then I've got to tie people up in webs, but. I've been there. [Done that. He wasn't even instrumental in actually coming up with that answer, but he is the one who found his father's work and didn't keep it secret like it was supposed to be.] But thank you for the promise. Honestly, I'd be pretty impressed if you ever did build something like that. Might be a good way to train, y'know? Can Spider-man get out of the high tech trap built by two scientists?

Y'never know what Wonderland could throw our way.

[She looks like he's just presented her with like, the nobel prize.]

I c-could build some training bots or something, if you want! Or uh, t-trap rooms or, something, I mean, anything you w-want! I usually work in the lab in the basement or uh, if you w-want some privacy to see designs I have a personal workspace on the s-second floor and yes, ohmygosh yes a-anything you want Mr. Spider-Man sir.

[There's a bit of a laugh] Woah, hey now. No Mr.'s or Sirs. I'm sure a guy whose not running around in spandex might ask that of you, but not me, okay? I'm just a regular guy. And we've already met in an alternate universe even if I was out of costume so you could consider us friendly by now. Call me Spidey.

Training bots and rooms sound like fun. I'd like to help.

Okay, I w-- wait, w-we did?

[She immediately looks like she's thinking over every word she's ever said to literally anyone. It looks like it's stressing her out a little, honestly. But she snaps back, trying to recover.]

Well, uhm, as I said, uh, r-room 18 on the second floor is my personal lab! And uh, I have a p-permanent desk in the lab in the basement, so uh, we can draw up plans or any specifics you'd like!

Yeah. Peter Parker. We were some of the only two people to talk about Science in a castle full of magic.

[He sounds a bit amused. Sometimes it's nice not doing the whole secret identity thing in Wonderland. He's really terrible at living a double life.]

I'll be there, and I'd want to help. And learn. I'm all about learning. [There's a long, long pause then.] Probably will show up without the spandex.

P-Peter--

[SHE NEVER GOT HIS LAST NAME. Did he tell her?? Did she forget?? How could she be so sloppy. Every part of her nerd brain is screaming internally and for a second she doesn't even hear him respond. God. She talked science with Peter Parker. She's going to fucking explode.]

Ohmygod that w-was you oh jeez. I'm so sorry if I sounded, uhm, r-ridiculous or, uh, anything, but if you still want anime recs, I can s-still give those, and uh, y-yeah, the invitation's still open and! Uhm! Yeah! Whenever y-you want!

[Just let her die. Right here. Throw her to the tentaclebots.]

[He hangs by one hand from the ceiling before he drops down on his feet, walking along the hallway as he talks to her. The excitement is kind of cool and kind of overwhelming and totally undeserved on his part, but he knows he liked talking to her at Hogwarts and clearly she is skilled at building awesome things if the tentaclebots are any indication.]

Hey, don't be sorry for something that was magical. [Yes, he used that term on purpose to be funny. They were magic people talking about nonmagic stuff.] Still want those recs so send them my way, and sounds good. I'll web by soon, and we can talk details.

Thanks again! [Spider-man sends her a salute before he cuts the feed.]

--Holy cow! I thought she said Spiderman! I heard Captain America was here, but I didn't know you were here too! [He was born in '48. Comic books were a way of life.]

Hello! And thank you, but I think we'll be alright. This is just a minor inconvenience, really.

[Woah, two cool scientist people know who he is??? This is unexpected. He waves. Make it a cool wave. These people think you're cool, Peter. Also, stop talking to yourself.]

Hey, yeah. Just your friendly Wonderland spider guy. Checking in.

A minor inconvenience? If tentacle wielding robots are a minor inconvenience, I don't know if I want to see what a major inconvenience is like for you.

[It's okay Pete. Ford talks to himself too.]

To be honest, you really, really wouldn't. Anyway, nice to meet you! I'm Dr. Stanford Pines.

Nice to meet you too, Doc. I appreciate the creativity behind knife wielding tentacled bots.

Wait, Pines like Dipper? [Peter's given up pretenses of keeping his secret identity secret here especially when people have read comic books or seen movies with him anyway. Dipper's a really good friend.]

Yes! Pines exactly like Dipper. I'm his great uncle. And thank you-- I've been more creative in my time though, so I wouldn't use that as a standard for my usual work.

I'm glad you know Dipper though. He and his sister are great kids.

[ooc: SORRY THIS IS SO LATE]

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e x p e r i m e n t #05 (accidental video)

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