e x p e r i m e n t #05 (accidental video)

[mviw]

[When the broadcast starts, it goes from silence to the immediate noise of two people screaming, punctuated by the sound of laser gunshots and mechanical whirring. It seems the device is on a side-table, giving a flat view of Ford and Alphys… perched on another table. Alphys is curled up, hands over her head, looking incredibly distressed, while Ford seems to be shooting at something off-camera.]

Oh m-my god, oh my god, we’re going to d-die here, I’m so s-sorry, I didn’t know they were all going to start...

Don’t worry! I happen to have excellent aim.

[All of a sudden, something takes a flying leap up onto the table, and Alphys yells as Ford shoots it down. The ensuing shot causes the device to fall over, revealing the floor is absolutely covered in knife wielding box tentacles, some with multiple arms, some with multiple knives, all running over each other and stabbing the floor, themselves, and the table. Alphys is still yelling. Ford is still shooting. It looks like an absolute catastrophe.]

Maybe we shouldn’t have prototyped them with the basic ability to learn--

Well it w-would have been fine if it was just, y-you know, one of them! They weren’t all supposed to turn on at the same time!

[Suddenly, Alphys turns her head and seems to notice the device, turning herself around and reaching out to grab it, bringing it in close to her and Ford.]

Uh, t-this is totally under control! No need to panic! I d-don’t, uhm, know how long this has been broadcasting, but, it’s f-fine! … And m-maybe don’t come to Ford’s room for, uhm, a little bit, for uh. Reasons.

Is that thing on? Uh, I mean-- Yes! Everything is absolutely, 100% under control. There is no need to worry about anythi-- [Ford cuts himself off and hisses.] Watch out, Alphys! I think it just tasted my blood!!

Oh g-god please don’t let that do anything new.

[And the device blinks off, cutting out the mechanical whirring sounds with it.]

Comments

voice

[mcgucket]

[You can't see it since the video's turned off, but Fiddleford had to resist the urge to roll his eyes at Ford. But at the same time... that habit of Ford's is something we're used to, isn't it? Maybe it's not a welcome one, but it's something familiar in this strange place we've been tossed out into. Instead, he sighs and acquiesces to Stanford's words, for now.]

Alright. I'll start headin' that way now.

[There's a bit of an awkward pause, before he suddenly speaks up again.]

Rampagin' machines aside, I'm grateful'ta have a familiar face here. [Even if we are annoyed with him for Understandable Reasons, Ford's still our best friend. The only friend we have in this unfamiliar dimension now, in fact.] So, ah... try not to get yourself and Miss Alphys killed? Otherwise it's gonna be another thing for me to have'ta worry about here.

[... He's probably still gonna grief you a little about this when he sees you, but he appreciates an intact best friend more than a skewered one, you know?]

voice

[mviw]

Dr. Alphys! [It's a gentle correction.] And don't worry so much about that.

--Oh and, listen: If Lee tries to peck your head, it just means he likes you. Tell him to stop and he'll leave you alone.

voice

[mcgucket]

As long as he doesn't breathe fire, then I suppose getting pecked is a risk I'll have to take.

[Though despite the quip, he assumes that Lee is a normal owl, because Ford would have said something otherwise if that were not the case, right?]

voice

[mviw]

Of course he doesn't breathe fire! He's just an owl. I have this metal plate in my head and he likes the sound my skull makes when he taps his beak against it.

I believe it's a sign of affection since he does it to other people.

[........The answer to that question is about... 50/50. Fiddleford got lucky this time.]

voice

[mcgucket]

[Oh, well that's... wait--]

Uh, alright... I hope you don't mind my askin' for an explanation regardin' why you have a metal plate in your head now, 'cause that sure wasn't a thing last time I saw you.

[seriously what the fuck ford]

voice

[mviw]

I don't mind at all. I documented many of my adventures as I travelled through the multiverse, and I have two of my journals here in Wonderland.

Just make yourself at home, I'll get to you as soon as I can.