Brittany Susan Pierce (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
stoptheviolence) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
entranceway2014-01-16 06:40 pm
stoptheviolence) wrote in entranceway2014-01-16 06:40 pm
[VIDEO]
[The camera unfocuses for a moment before focusing back in on...Brittany. Of course. It’s her camera, so why wouldn’t it be her? But she’s not alone. There’s an adorable miniature pony at her side...with a horn on its head...and the sounds of a chirping squirrel can be heard coming from somewhere just off-screen.]
[Brittany, of course, sees nothing wrong with any of this, and is happily spinning in her chair, wearing her pajamas, despite the fact that her hair is has been expertly styled, and her makeup is impeccable. Beside her, the usual decorations of a youthful teen girl could be seen. Bright colors. Stuffed animals. And a particular picture seen hanging on the wall right over her bed.]
‘sup, Wonderland. I’m Brittany. And this is my new show, the Wonderland edition of Fondue for Two.
...well, four, if you count Lady Winny and Sir Squeakums over there.
[More chirping, as if the squirrel were responding to her. The unicorn remained silent. Content with just sitting there and looking fabulous. As she should. Santana, on the other hand, is sitting nearby but away from the furry creatures, looking...like she is doing this out of love. Being the first semi-guest was not on her to-do list, especially after her experience with the show back home. Again: for love.]
We’re here to bring you the latest and greatest of Wonderland’s cheezy news. [As she says this, she leans forward and reaches down to pick up...something speared onto a large toothpick and covered in Fondue goodness. She makes a show of eating it. Because cheezy fondue. Get it?] And, I guess, whatever else we feel like talking about at the moment.
So if you’ve got the goods, feel free to call in. After all, sharing is caring.
[And then, just before she lets it go to the phones...or Network, or whatever, Santana decides to speak up:]
Do it or Imma break some kneecaps.
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What company?
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[Look at him; he's so proud of himself. Clearly his company is going to get so big that he won't need an ID. People will just know who he is.]
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Is that some sort of made up word? It sounds like a made-up word. Like something out of Doctor Seuss. Or English class.
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[Duh.]
Anyway, it's a Thneed, and it's pretty anything you need. It's the greatest most useful thing that anyone has ever knit. It's softer than silk, and smells sweet like butterfly milk!
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So, it's like a baby blankie or something?
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The only thing you can knit is clothes. You can't knit a mop. You have to buy one.
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[And he takes off his fuzzy pink scarf, and...it looks like a sweater, kind of? But it has a couple extra sleeves that were sewn together, and a hole in the center.]
This is a Thneed!
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I was right.
That definitely doesn't look like a mop.
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It makes no sense. You're trying to make it too many things at once. I know I would never want to wear something that you use to clean with.
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[He sighs.]
Look, you don't use it for everything at the same time. You get a couple of them and then you have a few for fashion, some for cleaning, and one for if you ever take up bee-keeping or scuba diving or something. It has infinite uses!
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And I stand by what I said. I would never want to wear something that you use to clean with. It's totally unfashionable.
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[Literally judging only by this apparently fashion disaster epidemic.]