001; Audio + Action

[signalized]

audio

[Being kidnapped isn't comforting for anyone, let alone someone as deeply paranoid as Bruce. He thinks of a rogue from Gotham that kidnaps young blondes and call them Alice. They're all mad in Gotham.

He wonders if they're all mad here too.

But he also knows how to mask that paranoia and rely on his public persona as he speaks over the network, choosing to keep to an audio post for now.]

My name is Bruce Wayne and while it is unlikely that my name has the weight here that it would have had at home but I figured I would put myself out there all the same. I'm sure you get tired of the same questions over and over again from new arrivals so I'll keep it to just this one.

What's the one thing you wish you had known about this place when you arrived? Advice or information that would have made the transition into Wonderland a little bit smoother, assuming such a transition is even possible, of course.

It goes without saying that you're free to leave more than one thing if you feel so inclined, I'm not going to turn away more information.

Thank you.

[And that's it, that's the post.]

Action

[After exhausting himself looking through the library he's managed to find the bar and order himself a drink to try to take to relax himself. Bruce doesn't remember the last time he felt this on edge -- which is saying something for him because he is always on edge in one way or another. This place seems mostly peaceful so far but it has to be some sort of deception. He was taken from his home, after all. And Gotham may not be the best of places but it is home and he'd like to get back to it. But he knows it won't be that easy, no one would bring that many people here without some sort of ulterior motives in play. They want something from all of them, the only question is what.

He throws back his first drink in one go. He can't imagine the catch is anything good but he has a feeling he'll know sooner or later. After all, there's always a catch. Some might call him cynical for jumping to conclusions like this so quickly but he likes to think he's being realistic. While Clark's death may have restored some well needed optimism to Bruce that doesn't mean he's blind to how cruel and ugly the world can be. He just knows now he has to try to be better than that himself.

What that means for him here, however, remains to be seen.]

Comments

action

[divaricate]

[Wanda is sitting in a nearby seat, very slowly nursing a sangria that was in a glass that could maybe resemble a small vase in size. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees and notices how quickly the man tosses his drink back, so she turns her head to the side to look over at him.]

That kind of a day? [Said with a slightly raised eyebrow. She's not judging, really; she can't when she's the one drinking out of a vase basically (she's also only been here a couple of weeks herself -- not that she knows he's new here).

Her accent, though, is one that sounds east European; if Bruce is familiar with what a Serbian accent sounds like, he may mistake it for something vaguely Serbian but not quite.]

[signalized]

[That kind of life, really, but who's counting? Well, he is. Sorry, he's the saltiest old man, but he's trying at least to be less so. Maybe not at the moment. It was easier to sound calm and collected over the network, to slip into the public persona of Bruce Wayne. The millionaire and the bat are two roles he knows well, when he's just Bruce?

Harder.]

It's not everyday I end up in someplace that looks like it was built by a b list villain.

[Sorry Mad Hatter. Not sorry at all.]

audio

[thesamurai]

There's a pamphlet now. Have you seen it? Didn't have it when I got here a couple years ago. I can probably dig it up for you if you want.

But as for what I wish I knew then?

[ She got here when there were literal skinless giants terrorizing the place. She was just glad to find out that wasn't a normal day - whatever 'normal' actually is. ]

No one's missing us back home. They don't think we're dead, we didn't suddenly vanish. Time just...froze. I wish I'd known that day one. Took some time before I did.

audio

[signalized]

I haven't. A pamphlet could be useful.

[He's not going to need no to more information.

He pauses at her words. Was there anyone left to miss him back home anymore? Alfred, of course, but beyond that? Lucius Fox could run Wayne Enterprises. Gotham would miss Batman but who would miss Bruce? Maybe Diana. Maybe.

Anyway, brooding aside]

That's good to know, at least. Things could go badly if I had just gone missing from my city.

video »

[sorryitasedyou]

[ Yeah, the name means nothing to her... But, she doesn't rule anything out these days. She's more than happy to help however she can with the arrival front and opts to give him a serious answer rather than troll. Crazy how situations can change that kind of stuff. ]

That this place doesn't get easier with time. It still throws me for a loop every now and then. So, I guess prepare for the unpredictable? Or just get really good at rolling with the punches. Also! [ And this one's kind of important and she's not at all speaking from experience... nope. ] Don't bury the dead. People come back, sometimes after a day - maybe two or three. It's not fun to wake up in the dirt after being murdered due to an event. [ Welcome to Wonderland? #awkward ]

video »

[signalized]

[the dead don't stay dead. that's...different. for a man who buried more people in his life than he could ever voice at once it's a hard thing to swallow. the dead stay dead.

don't they?

not here.

not that it'll bring his parents or Jason back, but it's good to know.]

Do a lot of people die here, then?

action

[postictal]

[Tim doesn't drink. Not really a matter of principle, honestly; he's sure he would if he was able to. It sounds great to be able to tune the world out for a few shots. But alcohol doesn't react real well with the meds he's taking and never has, so the bar's only an infrequent location for him in terms of visiting hours. Mostly he stops by if he needs something flammable in a pinch, which isn't often.

In this case, he's only dropped by to light up a few. His nerves have been shot to hell to befit the whole going to literal hell deal he's still recovering from, and he parks himself at the counter as he clicks on his lighter, sparking up the cigarette at his lips.

He inhales slowly, pausing only to regard the guy at his right.]

Do you, uh...mind if I...? [Probably should've asked before he lit the thing but, uh, whoops.]

Re: action

[signalized]

[It's a great way to self medicate, at least for Bruce it is. And sometimes he's been known to mix it with pills basically he is not a healthy person and no one should be taking life advice from him because he is a disaster at being a human being.

He looks up from his empty glass, shaking his head at the question.]

Not at all.

[Who was he to deny someone else one of their vices?]

[video]

[punful]

[Hey, it's a skeleton.]

people can come here from different timelines. so if you meet someone here who seems to be from home, it's possible they're from the future or past. or a world that's just slightly different from yours. that sorta thing.

Re: [video]

[signalized]

[...okay that's really weird but he's seen killer croc before so you know

weird happens.]

That's good to know. So alternate versions of ourselves could exist out in these other worlds, then?

[video]

[wriggedywrecked]

[Wonderland drags in The Goddamn Batman and it's this version? Bruh.]

[Rick has some opinions.]

Man, fuck you.

[video]

[signalized]

I realize I'm not the most popular guy with son but I don't think I warrant quite that reaction.

[Video]

[morethanasidekick]

That I had an evil, nympho, fae-twin with a bad dye job.

[...]

That's probably not very helpful to you, though.

Re: [Video]

[signalized]

I mean, it could be. We can't write out the option that I too could have an evil nypho twin out there.

Hopefully without the bad dye job, though.

voice;

[circlejerked]

Whatever you do, don't go near a closet when thinking about baby animals.

_{[Only in Wonderland does advice like this make any sense, but Anders is utterly serious. Believe him, he knows.]}

Oh, and beware the sea monster. It's temperamental.

Re: voice;

[signalized]

I'm assuming you're speaking from experience?

[But what if he misses his bat friends from the batcave???]

I would assume most sea monsters would be.

[Is he responding too calmly to the term sea monster? Well he did fight an alien abomination back home so you know, anything is possible.]

AUDIO.

[accelerate]

[ what's the one thing barry wished he'd known when he'd arrived in wonderland? that it'd separate him from iris. but that's too much of a debbie downer — and emotional — comment to give. some people aren't even fortunate enough to come in a wave of friends from home like he had. count your blessings, bear. ]

That the Mad Hatter's tea parties are pretty exclusive. Like, super exclusive. No one even knows where they are exclusive.

[ here we go again with his project: get an invite from the mad hatter to attend one of his tea parties. barry sounds pretty offended as he speaks quickly. ]

Did you read the books or see the movies? Because you should probably just forget everything about them. This place doesn't follow the same storyline.

AUDIO.

[signalized]

[Bruce has no constant like Iris in his wife -- unless you count Alfred, but that'
s a little different. even if he does miss his butler/father figure.]

If no one knows where they are, how can they go to them?

[And why would they want to? then again, Bruce has had bad luck with a Mad Hatter in Gotham, he's not sure he'd do better with one here.]

It's been a while since I've read or watched them, but it's good to know there's little similarities, then. I assume I don't have to worry about anything I drink shrinking me then?

[Because he needs a drink.]

action

[blackbirdsing]

[Sarah is just settling in, waiting for Jane when Bruce comes in and tosses back a shot. Raising an eyebrow, she takes a sip of her beer before turning to him.]

We just got done with a terrible event so either you're reeling from literally going to hell or you're new and what I just said is a little alarming. Either way, you have a look. I've been here for seven months and I'm learning every newish person has a look.

[And she has a shot ready to go for him as she's talking, holding out the glass with a friendly smile.]

I'm Sarah.

action

[signalized]

You guys went to hell? [That is a little alarming, and his eyebrows climb appropriately in response, though how much of that is genuine and how much is for show is debatable.]

You caught me, I'm a newbie. And you're not the first person to say I have a look.

[Though that isn't always a good thing. Still he clicks his glass against hers, it can't hurt to be friendly, he might learn more that way.]

Bruce.

audio

[sponsored]

[ ;alkejr holy shit is this for real ok play it cool everything is fine-- ]

Place is kinda conscious. And likes to mess with you -- if you ask the closets for something, be lawyer-level specific.

[ because damn it if that rooster doesn't still like to come out and stalk faith once in awhile... ]

audio

[signalized]

Noted.

[Later he's going to learn this lesson the hard way when he accidentally pulls out versions of the Batsuit like Adam West's or the one with the bat nipples.

That's what he gets.]

I take you're another veteran of this place.

video;

[chocolatepudding]

The tables don't stop giving you food just 'cause you're full. Don't experiment, just stop eating.

[ It's a genuine coincidence he has a Flash cupcake in his hand as he says this--really, it is. At least he's paused eating it instead of talking with his mouth full--he figures his lisp is hard enough to understand for someone new to Wonderland.

It's not that bad, but he's alwyas been self conscious. ]

I nearly puked my first day here. Disgusting.

video;

[signalized]

I'd like to think I'd have enough self control to begin with. [Actually, with Bruce it's a bigger issue with him forgetting to eat with what an obsessive workaholic he is. Especially since he won't have Alfred here to sass him into self care.]

But it's good to know. So they'll give us any food we ant?

audio

[krmvgivv]

That you can go home. Everyone says you can't but it's not really true. It's just that you don't get any say in when it happens, or for how long, or if you'll keep your memories.

[It's faint comfort, but still good to remember.]

And if someone who's been here longer than you tells you something? You should listen to them. They're probably right.

audio

[signalized]

So I just have to always be on alert for the possibility. Do people leave and come back then?

[The way dipper mentions memories makes him assume they do.]

I'm not one to balk at useful information -- learning from other people's mistakes is always preferable to learning from your own.

[ Action ]

[luckynumberthree]

[ The bartender currently behind the bar happens to be a cheerful blond Brit sporting a Santa hat, because it is December (and that's apparently reason enough). When Bruce sits down at the bar, Simon glances up from where he's wiping down the bar and shoots the man a crooked a grin, not recognizing him, but that's not all that strange in the bar. It's usually one of the first stopping points for new arrivals. Everyone seems to show up here eventually, if they're of age. ]

What's your poison? Or do you want the 'Welcome to Wonderland' special of the day?

[ Action ]

[signalized]

[Look, if you're stuck in a new dimension with no escape you might as well drink a little to wear off the shock. -- or something like that. at least the British accent is somewhat comforting, as it's something he's been hearing his entire life.

he misses you already, alfred.]

I'll take the special -- might as well keep with today's pattern of surprises

voice }

[deathlessness]

Forewarned does not always mean forearmed.

[Cryptic? Maybe a little but that's how Wonderland tends to roll in general.]

voice }

[signalized]

But there is warning sometimes?

[audio]

[saved]

What weight would it have back where you're from? [His name. Peter doesn't recognize it at all, but with everyone coming from different universes, it makes sense.]

Uh. There's a lot I wish I'd known when I arrived. I don't know if I can put it into words better than what it'll be like to live it. Events can be hard. Mirrors are really dangerous, and they're always watching.

This place wants our memories. It's what fuels it as far as anyone can tell, but it means all your memories are threatened as long as you're here.

[audio]

[signalized]

I'm the CEO of one of the biggest companies in my world, so I suppose that makes me a bit of a celebrity.

[While Batman is more urban myth but he's not going to bring the Bat up,. especially not in relation to himself]

I've heard about the mirrors from a few of the other inhabitants so far but the memories are a new one -- is there a particular way they target them?

[Because that's....really alarming. As bad as lot of Bruce's memories are, they're his.]

( audio )

[lamiae]

[ nope, doesn't carry any weight, though beckett gets the distinct impression that it should be. for whatever reason, she can't quite put her finger on it, but given the nature of this place... it's not worth worrying about. either she'll figure it out or it'll remain a mystery to her. such is the wonderland way. ]

I'd like to know why they chose that exact moment to bring me here. Why that moment was the ideal one and not any other point in my life.

( audio )

[signalized]

That's a good question, it's something I've wondered about myself. Why now instead of a million other moments before this one? What makes this one so important?