[video ]Just a normal dude being normal doot doot

[toolatetochangethename]

 [Okay, so, Wonderland.  Got it.  Cassie loved that book, especially the creepy stuff. His little girl, right there! 

[Nothing too creepy yet, but, hey: he dropped acid in college: he's so ready.  

[ No one knows who he is, and there are precisely ZERO Baskin-Robbins here (you bet your ass he checked) so his secret is safe. So this is his big chance, time to make a fresh start. Right. He's got this.  Eye of the tiger. Be the change. He's sure there's a cliche for it. 

[The point is, maybe this is a good thing. No, it is a good thing. He's got this. ] 

So. Uh. Hi. [He managed a cheezy smile and car salesman's hand wave.] 

I'm Scott....[Aaaand his mind goes blank.  How do people do this?  And why is the first thing that comes to mind 'and I'm totally not an ex-con'? 

[It's not that hard, Scott. Just, you know, sound normal. Whatever you do, don't sound suspicious or like you're trying to hide anything. Because what do you have to hide, right? hahahahahhhhhhhhhhhhh.] 

...and I'm completely normal. [NAILED. IT.]

Comments

: video }

[toolatetochangethename]

Well, sure. I mean, no one's completely normal. [He concedes the point. Especially considering his circle(s) of associates). ]

Or if they are, they're assholes. Like Jim.

Which I'm not, also. An asshole, I mean.

video }

[deathlessness]

Duly noted. Though I'm not sure who this "Jim" is you're referring to.

[If it's a pop culture reference she kinda slept through the invention of movies, television and the internet so ... she's still got some catching up to do.]

Re: video }

[toolatetochangethename]

[Oh did he let that slip? Sorry, 'Jim Paxton' and 'asshole' just sort of run together in his brain a lot. Go figure.]

He's my ex's new...whatever. And he's a cop.

[See? Asshole. QED.]

video }

[deathlessness]

Ahhhh.

[Oh good, she wasn't missing anything. Pop culture stuff oddly enough comes up a lot.]

Was it a bad break up?

[It seems like it obviously was, but maybe he wants to vent?]

video }

[toolatetochangethename]

Is there such a thing as a 'good' break up?

[Seriously.]

Honestly, though. I get why Maggie ditched me. That's fine. It's him I have a problem with.

[He thought Maggie had better taste than that!]

video ; to end }

[deathlessness]

I don't know. I don't really have a lot of experience with the subject.

[Her last boyfriend before Keelin was murdered by her aunt. But sometimes amicable break ups exist? In theory? Do people ever end relationships due to mutual understandings?]

So it's more a matter of you thinking she deserves better.

Re: video ; to end }

[toolatetochangethename]

I guess any guy that gets with you knows he's lucky enough to stick around.





...and I did not mean that as creepy as it came out. [No wonder Hank has that permanent eyeroll going whenever he talks to Scott. ]

But, [AHEM. Right. Back on track.] exactly. If she was gonna upgrade, well, Jim is not an upgrade.

[deathlessness]

[She laughs, so at least there's that.]

I meant it more in the sense that I haven't had many relationships. But I appreciate the compliment?

[She's fairly certain it was meant to be one.]

Well, to you, maybe. But perhaps she sees something you don't.

[Because, you know, you're the ex.]

[toolatetochangethename]

Yeah, uh, let's just forget that whole...words...ever happened.

[Walk it off, Scott. You've said dumb shit before.]

Yeah, I suppose. Actual job, stable income, uniform, cleft chin--If you're into that sort of thing. [Ugh. Okay when he says it like that, even he can see some points. ]

[deathlessness]

Already forgotten.

[Freya doesn't actually care about any of those things but her family is wealthy and they don't believe in jobs so ... whatever works for you, Maggie.]

If she's happy, that should be the thing that matters.

[toolatetochangethename]

How can living with a neanderthal--however law-abiding--make you happy?

Seriously. He's got a unibrow. Like one big shelf of hair on his forehead.

[OK not really but...poetic license or something.]

Point is, he's still an asshole.

[deathlessness]

Funny things make people happy. But I will have to take your word for it in terms of his ... personality.

[Since, you know, she's stuck in Wonderland and has never met him.]

[toolatetochangethename]

Yeah, well, not him. He shouldn't make anyone happy.

[Harrumph.]

He arrested me. I mean. Come on. WHO DOES THAT?

[deathlessness]

Were you doing something illegal?

[It seems like a valid question to ask.]

[toolatetochangethename]

No. [You wound him!

He was returning stuff he stole which is like the opposite of a crime. Maybe.]

Okay, it was kind of a grey area. Legally speaking.

But that's not the point. He. Arrested. Me.

[deathlessness]

I see. That completely paints him in a whole new light.

[Her tone may be slightly dry to the point where it's hard to tell if she's serious or not.]

How rude of him.

[toolatetochangethename]

Exactly. Super rude. Like I said: asshole.

If you'd heard his whole smug lecture, you'd know. 'You had us convinced you were gonna change your ways, Scott'.

[Jim Paxton is The Worst.]

[deathlessness]

The holier than thou are always the worst, aren't they?

[That? That Freya has a fair amount of experience with. This she understands.]

[toolatetochangethename]

Yeah. Exactly. Not like he's so perfect, right?

Just, for the record? When Cassie got attacked, who went to rescue her?

Me.

Not him. [In case she needed a few clues.]

[deathlessness]

Mmmmm.

[A beat.]

Who's Cassie?

[toolatetochangethename]

Cassie is my daughter. And the coolest kid in the Western US. Probably the whole US.

Those two concepts are probably related, by the way.

[deathlessness]

I'm getting that. But I'm also betting my niece could try and challenge her for coolest kid in the whole US.

[She's just saying.]

But, she lives in New Orleans, so I suppose we can let them have their regional wins.

[toolatetochangethename]

Hmmmm, okay. But if we ever have a duel, Cassie gets to bring her ant.

[It's totally not cheating, but a girl with a dog-sized pet ant? That's got to tip any coolness basketball right into the net.]

[deathlessness]

[And Hope and Cassie would basically immediately become best friends and agree that adults are dumb.

To be frank, Hope would probably just be grateful to have a friend, period.]

Her ant?

[toolatetochangethename]

[ Adults are dumb. Scott should know, being one. ]

Yeah, it's like her pet.

On the plus, she wins every show and tell.