+ some wonderlands are kind

[ Sitting in the view of the camera is a sign, written in red crayon.

OPERATION: MAKE FRIENDS SLASH GIRLFRIEND TAKE 1 ]

Hey. [ And the sign gets moved for a second, to reveal a tanned face, a ridiculous shock of curly, dark hair, and bright eyes. That all belongs to Leo Valdez, who you are going to regret listening to in about two seconds. ] The name's Leo, local ship pilot-captain-repair-boy, dragon-fixer, and champion food-eater. I'm from, uhh... that's not really important, but I'm a totally nice guy! I like pretty much anything with a mechanical center, really bad--which really means really awesome--jokes, and trying really hard not to die.

Which, you like too, right? [ Leo gives a grin to the feed, runs a hand through his dark hair, and it's a little more sheepish than he meant for it to come off. ] The not dying part, since that's a problem here, I guess.

[ He rolls his gaze up and off screen for a second, rocks back and forth from his seated position, then returns to actually looking at the camera. ] So on the path of this not dying thing, we should not-die together, and maybe hang out. I mean, if I'm gonna get out of here at some point, I might as well try to do it with a prom date, right?

Right? [ Leo is this a joke. ] So, you know, if you're single and--[ finger guns ] ready to mingle with a...semi-human, hit me up on...

On my not phone. Man, I can't remember the last time I used a phone. That's kinda messed up.

[ There's a brief second of silence before he snaps back to attention and nods at the feed, knocking off a fake salute. ] Right! Okay, well, let me know. See ya!

[ ...click. ]

[ One minute, you're minding your own business in camp, enjoying your victories, and ignoring the impending doom that is becoming a constant cloud over your head, and the next, you're appearing in a mansion.

At first, Leo's ninety percent sure he's getting some weird dream vision from his dad again. Supposedly Zeus put a stop to those, so he's a little impressed with Hephaestus' tenacity, but after a hard pinch to the arm, he's sort of figuring out he's actually awake right now, and someone just transported him out of nowhere to somewhere else. Was it Gaea, or was it something else entirely? No one had ever been able to do this before, and there's something on his person that wasn't there before, like a little phone, so maybe it was his dad--

His mind is racing, to the point where his body is hot to the touch, and then there's no warning and he just lights up, flaring wild orange and red in the middle of the hallway. It's that that brings him back to the present, and Leo swears, loudly, and tries to calm himself down--by the time his fire's been put out, he's standing, butt naked, in the middle of the entrance hall.

Awesome.

The little device he found himself with, however, is unharmed. The demigod pretty much scrambles across the room to find a tapestry to duck behind, covering the important bits, then squints at the device, just laying there, innocently.

There's a moment of indecision before he dashes across the room, grabs it, and runs back. A little curious tinkering reveals the capabilities of the device, and Leo clicks record on the video setting. He looks a little singed, and is holding the device far enough away from his face so that you can just see the tapestry and part of his naked chest.]

So... Am I posting to some kind of kidnapee network? Uh, hi, my name's Leo, and I think I just got kidnapped too, and, uh...

[ He winces, and tries for a smile that might be sheepish. ] Can anybody bring me some clothes?